How to calm the inner. How to understand the source of the problem

Are you prone to fits of rage? Do you curse everything, kick things and shout obscenities, scaring away all the people around you? Does it ever happen that you feel like your blood is boiling when you are stuck in a traffic jam, have received a relatively minor bad news or did you just hear something you didn’t want to hear? If this is the case, then you need to find a way to manage your anger before it controls your life. Dealing with chronic rage isn't easy, so it's important to learn how to calm down in the moment and in the long term.

Steps

Calm down in moments of anger

Go for a walk. Walking away from the situation helps you calm down and think things through. It's even better if you can go for a walk in nature, where you can take your mind off the problem and enjoy the beauty of the world around you. Walking will help you burn off some of it instantly. negative energy and move away from the question. If you're having a heated argument, there's nothing wrong with saying, “I'd better go for a walk.”

Resist the first impulse. If you are prone to fits of anger, then it is likely that your first impulse will not be very good. You might want to kick your car, punch a wall, or even yell at someone. Instead, ask yourself if this would be a good and productive action, and stop yourself if necessary. Stop for a moment to understand how you really should act, and think about what will best calm you down.

Your first impulse can often be destructive and completely unreasonable. Don't make things worse for yourself by giving in to him.

Dance. You might think that the last thing you want to do when you're angry is dance, and that's exactly why you should do it. If you feel angry, turn on your favorite uptempo tune and start dancing and singing along loudly. This way, an external stimulus will distract you from negative thoughts.
- If this method works for you, you can even choose a specific song to play whenever you feel angry.
Do a deep breathing exercise. Sit up straight in your chair. Inhale slowly through your nose, stretching it into 6 counts. Then exhale for a count of 8 or 9. Pause and repeat 10 more times.
- Try to concentrate on your breathing, getting rid of thoughts about what upset you.
Count down from fifty. If you start saying the numbers out loud or even in a whisper, you can instantly calm yourself. Try doing nothing during this time so that the only thing you have to worry about is the numbers. Focusing on this simple and specific task will prevent you from becoming overwhelmed with anger and will force you to think about the problem with a fresh mind.
- If you're still angry, repeat the exercise or even start counting down from 100.
Meditate. Meditation allows you to control your emotions. If you feel like you can't control yourself, help yourself with meditation. Try to physically distance yourself from the problem: go outside, onto the stairs, or even to the restroom.
- Take slow, deep breaths. This will slow down your heart rate. The breaths should be deep enough to allow your belly to expand and contract.
- Imagine how golden light fills your body with every breath, and your mind relaxes. As you exhale, imagine something black and dirty leaving your body.
- If you train yourself to meditate every morning, even when you're not angry, you'll feel more calm overall.
Imagine something pleasant. Close your eyes and imagine your favorite place in the world, be it the beach you went to every summer as a child, or beautiful lake, which you still remember from your school days. It can also be an image of a place where you have never been before - a forest, a field of flowers or a beautiful panorama. Choose a place that instantly makes you feel calmer and more peaceful, and you will notice that your breathing normalizes.
- Focus on every detail. The more details you see, the easier it is for you to distance yourself from angry thoughts.
Listen to calm music. Relaxing with your favorite performers will help you calm down and lift your spirits. Music has been proven to make us feel in a certain way and brings back memories. It can calm angry or anxious people, even if they don't know where the anxiety is coming from.
- Classical music and jazz are especially helpful in this regard, but you should find what works for you.
Turn on positive thoughts. You will be able to suppress your anger if you focus your attention on positive thoughts. Close your eyes, let it all go negative thoughts that come to mind and think of at least three positive things. Positive thoughts can be positive aspects of a situation you're worried about, or simply thoughts about something else that you're looking forward to or that makes you feel happy. Here are some examples of positive settings:
- This will pass.
- I can bear it.
- Difficult situations are opportunities for development.
- I won't be angry forever, this is just a temporary feeling.
Learn to communicate productively. In a fit of anger, you may blurt out the first thing that comes to your mind, which will make you even angrier and anger your interlocutor. As a result, the situation will look much worse than it is. If something makes you angry, think about what made you angry, and then express your feelings.
Know when to ask for help. Many people can cope with anger on their own, but you may need professional help if:
- Little things make you angry.
- When you are angry, you behave aggressively: scream, scream, fight.
- The problem is chronic and keeps recurring.
Join an anger management program. Such programs are quite effective. They help people understand the nature of anger, develop strategies for managing it, and learn to control their emotions. There are many options for such programs, and you can choose what suits you.
- There may be some in your region individual lessons for people of a certain age, profession or life circumstances.
- To choose a program, look for information about such programs in your city on the Internet. Please clarify your request if you are interested in any specific topic.
- You can also ask a doctor or psychotherapist to recommend such programs there.
Find the right therapist. The best way to stay calm is to understand the root of your anger. A therapist can teach you relaxation techniques that you can use in situations that trigger your anger. Your therapist will help you learn to control and express your emotions. In addition, a therapist who specializes in issues from the past (such as parental neglect or childhood abuse) can help reduce anger caused by past events.
- There are organizations that provide psychological assistance for free. For example, you can get it.

Scientists are sure that nerve cells are not restored, so we strongly recommend that you always be calm and pull yourself together. In order not to worry about various little things, with or without reason, you need to learn to control your emotions. However, doing this is not as easy as it might seem at first glance. Instead, we want to tell you about ways that will help you relax in difficult times, as well as life rules that will help prevent similar situations in the future. So, let's look at each point in detail.

Look at things from a different perspective. Most effective way To calm yourself down is to look at what is happening from the other side - from the better side. Here are a few examples of situations that seem hopeless and make you nervous:

Passing an exam (fear of not passing the exam, being disgraced, being considered a failure, etc.). Now let's look at the situation from the other side: this is the last step, after which you will no longer have to sit at your desk for long and tedious hours. Therefore, you need to smile and enjoy your last hours in school.
Divorce (fear of being left alone, being of no use to anyone, fear of approaching the end of the meaning of life, etc.). Yes, on the one hand, this is a truly terrible situation, but on the other hand, it’s a chance to start life anew, from scratch, and truly create ideal relationship with another person.

Look at things from a different perspective This is roughly how you should think. Find in this situation a small but positive factor from which you will build.

Stop worrying
Take a break. The peculiarity of anxiety is the fact that as soon as you are distracted by something extraneous, all your worries disappear, and you no longer even remember why and why you were so worried. Getting distracted by a conversation or some other activity is not easy, because you must be really interested in this communication or activity. Therefore, find those areas of activity that can really absorb you. Girls, for example, are interested in knitting, men - football. Of course, these are stereotypes, but this is not important, the main thing is that they give a clear idea of what we are talking about.

Tell us about your problem to a loved one. Create an explosion of positive emotions. Anxiety can be destroyed by a positive explosion of your emotions. This is quite easy to do. You need a very funny movie, humorous program or a pack of fresh jokes. But it’s better if you view/read all this in the circle of a large company.

Laughter and a cheerful mood have a powerful ability to destroy any worries, especially if good mood last not five minutes, but the whole evening. Only then are you guaranteed a restful sleep without negative thoughts. Create an explosion of positive emotions. Do what you love. This point is closely intertwined with the “get distracted” point. If you have favorite activity or a hobby that you are ready to spend the maximum amount of free time on, and it perfectly distracts you from everything that is happening around you, then it will be just wonderful.

Perhaps you like to play some kind of sport, or maybe you like to cook or knit, or just play on the computer. The main thing is that the activity occupies not only “your hands”, but also your head. You must be completely involved and focus only on what you are doing in at the moment, and not think about what worries you. Do what you love

Don't think about bad things
Find irrefutable evidence that everything will be fine. To stop thinking about bad things, you need to turn on logic and believe in it. For example, are you worried about something, are you thinking about it, are you afraid that everything will end badly!? If you find irrefutable evidence that everything will end well, then the worries themselves will disappear from your head. In most cases, arguments can easily be found if you stop worrying and take a sober look at the situation. And in essence, there is no point in thinking about the bad; it is more logical to worry later, when the worst has already come, and not now, when it supposedly can happen.

And if thoughts about an upcoming event haunt you, then it’s better to start preparing a “basement for retreat,” that is, options for what to do in the event of an unsuccessful outcome of events. Find irrefutable arguments that everything will be fine. Perform the lungs physical exercise. You can remove negative thoughts from your head through active physical exercise. If you are in a panic attack, you feel fear and bad thoughts don't give you rest, do 15 squats.

If you cannot do this for certain reasons (for example, you are at work), then fast pace work with your hands (clenching and unclenching your fists). Of course, various arm swings, pull-ups and push-ups help the best. You can get rid of a panic attack in a matter of seconds if you immediately perform a large amount of exercise. Perform light physical exercise. Wash cold water. You can quickly bring yourself to your senses by washing your face with cold water.

This procedure must be repeated several times. Of course, there will be little pleasant, but it quickly brings to the consciousness of any person who is overtaken by bad thoughts. If you can’t wash your face, then at least wet your handkerchief cool water and apply it to your forehead, the scarf should also touch your temples, this way the effect will be better. But you should understand that washing with cold water should be used only in extreme situations (at the peak), and not constantly. Otherwise, in addition to a bad nervous system, you will still make money colds, which will in no way brighten up your condition. Wash with cold water. Take a contrast shower.

A similar tip, but more effective in impact, is a contrast shower. A cold douse, and then a hot one, makes you “sober up” much faster than just washing your face with cold water. The only problem is that taking a contrast shower is not possible in all cases. We are not always at home, and bad thoughts come regardless of our desire.

Take a contrast shower A contrast shower should be taken every morning and evening. In the morning, you should finish your bath with cold water so that you are alert and ready for any difficulties. In the evening, on the contrary, it should be warm, so that the contrast shower will “wash away” all the accumulated problems from you, and the last warm douche will set you up for the coming sleep.

Control your feelings
Find your “salvation pill.” If experiences become an integral part of your life, and you are already starting to worry about it without it, then you need to consult a doctor. But if you consider these signs of distress not so serious as to warrant going to the hospital, then we will advise you to find your “salvation pill.” That is, find the remedy that often helps you calm down best. You can find it only through numerous experiments and observations of your body.

As a rule, there is a placebo effect here, that is, in fact, you may feel better even from a mint candy. The main thing is to catch the remedy that will help you, and your consciousness will remember it. Find your “salvation pill” Get rid of bad habits. Unfounded worries may arise due to excessive use alcoholic drinks or tobacco, despite the apparent help, because many seek a sense of calm in alcohol, and it is a deadly destroyer of the nervous system. Because of it, a person becomes irritated and can constantly worry about even the smallest things.

In addition, to become more calm, you need to start leading healthy image life, and the elimination of bad habits is the basis for creating a healthy lifestyle. Get rid of bad habits. Maintain a healthy daily routine. Sometimes the cause of anxiety and depression is an incorrect daily routine, in which insufficient time is devoted to sleep, rest, or vice versa - there is no physical exercise. Your daily routine should be fully consistent with your biological clock, which dictates the correct daily routine.

If you change it in any way, you may run into health problems, which will begin with mental disorders. Therefore, we strongly recommend that you listen to your body and start living according to the rules. Maintain a daily routine. Correct and healthy eating. Of course proper nutrition- this is the basis of all fundamentals, it is thanks to food that we can both cripple our body and heal it.

To carry out prevention and strengthen your nervous system You should always enrich your body with all essential vitamins, macro- and microelements. We also recommend consuming honey before and after bedtime, which has a positive effect on your nerves. Proper and healthy nutrition
Let's stop worrying about trifles

Seek help from a psychologist. When the situation completely gets out of control, when attacks of psychological disorders are repeated over and over again, this is the first sign that it is time to turn to a psychologist, a specialist who can help you get rid of constant anxiety. Even with the help of medical techniques, you cannot get rid of this in 1-2 sessions, and the more you delay with this, the worse it will be for you. Seek help from a psychologist.

Give yourself control over the situation. In general, you can stop worrying with the help of ordinary self-hypnosis that everything is fine with you and everyone is healthy. By repeating these phrases to yourself many times, over time you will begin to believe it yourself and the anxiety will go away. But in this situation, you must have a suggestible character in order to be able to believe in your own beliefs. Instill in yourself control over the situation. Go to bed. Our final advice on how to overcome any anxiety would be this: go to bed.

Sleep is not only calming, but also very powerful remedy, which restores strength, which allows you to live on and enjoy every day. If it is difficult to fall asleep, then take a sleeping pill. Go to bed. To summarize, we would like to repeat that the ability to control yourself and not get nervous over trifles is a very important and useful skill in life. And not only your current condition, but also your future health depends on it, but it can easily deteriorate due to constant nervous breakdowns.

Watch thematic video:

We live in a rapidly developing world. The endless bustle and never-ending to-do list gets on our nerves at times. We begin to worry about it and without it. In some situations, experiences even benefit us, they encourage us to act and force us to pull ourselves together. However, more often than not, any experience has a destructive effect on our nervous system.

Scientists have found that nerve cells do not recover. That’s why you should pull yourself together and ask yourself: how to stop being nervous?
How to stop being nervous - a guide to action

For the most part, emotional experiences appear in a person just like that. That is why the first thing you should do is learn to control your emotions and learn to relax.

You see, when we are nervous and worried, fear constrains our body and does not allow us to relax.

At first, try meditation, yoga or calanetics. These activities help you connect with your inner self and become more spiritual.

Now let's act and get all unnecessary thoughts out of our heads.
Stop worrying and solve problems as they arise

I am 100% sure that everyone knows about this council, but not many people do it.

Apparently you just like to be nervous and dwell on your experiences. If not, then start thinking about solving problems only when they arise.

Don't try to solve all problems at once. In any case, you will not be able to correct yesterday’s troubles, but you will solve future ones in the future. If any problem arises, do not waste time worrying. Better concentrate on solving the problem itself.

I'll give you an example of what not to do.

So, at one time I worked for a corporate travel organization. Our boss was so nervous that she liked to worry about everything. He takes the documents for a visa and begins to think: what if they refuse, what if they don’t issue it on time, what if the flight is cancelled, what if...

Now tell me: why bother at all about some stranger’s uncle’s visa?

If you worry about every uncle like that, then by the age of 30 you can go crazy. In any case, nothing depended on our boss in this case.

If the embassy decided to refuse a visa to the director of company N, then this is his problem, not someone else’s. In any case, no one from our organization was responsible for the embassy, and therefore not responsible for the visa refusal.

IMPORTANT TO KNOW: How to get rid of obsessive thoughts?

So draw your own conclusions! Don’t create problems out of the blue and don’t invent them for yourself in advance.
To stop being nervous, let’s analyze the reason

Every person is nervous for their own reasons. If you can't get rid of anxiety, don't brush it off, but try to find the real reason similar condition.

For example, it’s 10 pm, my daughter is not at home, her phone is switched off.

Don’t immediately tear out your hair and call the police. It is possible that the girl is simply saying goodbye to her boyfriend at the entrance, and the phone’s battery is dead.

Or the husband said that he was leaving work, and after 1.5 hours he is still not there. In this case, he could simply have been stuck in a traffic jam or his boss stopped him on the way out.

NOTE: We completely change your life!

By analyzing such situations and bringing them to their logical conclusion, you will see how quickly you will stop being nervous and find peace.
Let's look at things from the other side

When you start to feel nervous, try to find something positive in the situation.

Know: even in the most hopeless situation you can see a ray of light.

For example, say you are taking a final exam. Instead of thinking about retaking, think about yours last day at school. After all, tomorrow you will pass the exam, and the day after tomorrow you will be free!

If your husband has left you, you should not feel sorry for yourself. Instead, think: “It’s great that my husband left right now, when I’m still young and beautiful. Tomorrow I’ll create a profile on a dating site, and new fans will ask for my hand!”…
Getting rid of irritants

In this case, you need to get rid of all the friends, relatives or colleagues who make you even more nervous.

Thematic video:

Understand - all these instigators are energy vampires and are recharged due to your nervous state.

For example, you are 1 day late in submitting an important report. You don’t seem to be worried, but then a colleague starts to mess with your brains with a fine, dismissal, loss of bonus, etc.

And here you are from calm person you turn into a neurasthenic. You start to work yourself up and drink valerian.
Letting off steam

However, the most effective methods physical activity is considered.

If you often get nervous, scream, throw things around, then hang a punching bag at home and hit it to your heart's content.

You can also go bowling, play tennis or football.

Not interested?

Then maybe you will be interested in fitness, dancing or karate?

By playing sports, you can not only stop being nervous, but also improve your mood
Let's get rid of guilt and stop being nervous

It is quite common for us to feel nervous due to guilt.

We worry because we lied to someone, misled them, etc.

Get rid of this destructive feeling and then you can stop being nervous.
Eating right

As strange as it may sound, stress and nerves can also originate within us. How? Yes, very simple!

At night we devoured a plate of pasta with mayonnaise, ate a piece of cake and washed it down with cola. As a result, we can’t sleep all night, we get angry, nervous, and we walk around broken the whole next day.

That's why you should seriously reconsider your diet. Eat only vegetables with meat, replace coffee green tea and eat more fruit.

Once you start eating right, within a month you will see improvements occurring in your mind and body.
Let's chase down our fears

We are all human and we are all imperfect. We are afraid of everything in the world, as a result of which we become anxious and nervous. We are afraid of dismissal, betrayal, old age, war, etc.

Stop being afraid of everything!

After all, we are not rabbits! If you lose your job, you can always find a job you like. And if your husband cheated, then throw him away.

The only thing traitors can give you is syphilis and gonorrhea.

Do you need them?

You can always lose excess fat, but if you don’t want to grow old, drink poison when you’re 40 years old and the problem will disappear by itself.

In conclusion, I would like to give you a simple and effective advice: Admit your imperfections. Don't worry about trifles. No one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. After all, even presidents are not immune from mistakes. The main thing is not to focus on your crooked nose, short fingers or mistakes you've made.

It happens that we are looking for complex recipes to improve the quality of life. We think: “If I go to yoga, I’ll immediately become calmer.” And of course, we don’t go to yoga. And we have a heartfelt excuse - why do we feel so bad? There is no good yoga in the area! Sadly...

And yet, there are primitive quick-fix self-help remedies that have been used for centuries in cases of stress, irritation, frustration, in a situation where someone or something is eating your brain out.

They were used for recommendations by general practitioners (and not only) of the old school. One of those who took the patient by the hand, and this already made him feel better. Self-help tips were taught by physical therapists, massage therapists, and athletic trainers. Now advice is more expensive and more difficult to formulate. Self-help is suppressed, this is not a market approach.

And we'll go back to the old ones good times, when self-help was encouraged.

Method 1: Get distracted by something

This way to remove emotional stress suitable in cases where you are trapped, driven into a corner and cannot escape anywhere. For example, sit at a planning meeting and listen to your boss, internally boiling. You can’t escape, but... Being distracted by the contemplation of something extraneous, neutral and being carried away by this extraneous thing - best way Don’t beat yourself up over trifles.

For example: “However, what is Masha’s manicure like... I wonder how she did it?”

This only works if you yourself understand the benefits of such a strategy - don’t look at the nasty, don’t listen to the nasty. If you like to fume and get into arguments, that’s your right.

Method 2 Leave an annoying situation (aka emotional zone)

Did something make you sad at someone else's birthday? On a picnic? You can’t stand some group, public page, page social network? Do you dream of removing an unpleasant person from your friends list?

So, we quickly left the group forever. They banned an argumentative provocateur, a troll, a boor, a fool. Deleted your profile, if that happens.

Quickly call a taxi (don’t squeeze, don’t squeeze), kiss the hostess and rush home - away from the party, away from the barbecue, away from the irritating, emotional zone.

Method 3 Drink some water

This is already the signature recipe of all brilliant therapists who do not sell dietary supplements from pharmaceutical corporations.

A glass of water, drunk slowly, stops everything famous sciences seizures. The first thing they offer a person who has suffered something terrible is a glass of water. Drinking water triggers the body's self-rehabilitation mechanism. Most often, people feel ill for two reasons:

hysteria (sympatho-adrenal crisis in another way),
dehydration of the body that was not noticed in time.

Since we don’t listen to our body and don’t teach healthy lifestyle, we drink tea, coffee and soda all day - we all have dehydration, and you have it too. Go drink a glass of water right now, and then read on.

Method 4 Get involved in an exciting, interesting activity

This method is suitable in a situation where you cannot be “let go.” You need to break the stuckness of chewing “And they, And I, And fuck them all” with something cool, even if it’s stupid and tasteless. Reading a detective story. Computer game. Hunting and gathering. Surveillance and tracking. An attempt to reveal someone's secret. Even by spying and eavesdropping, damn it.

You must be involved in the intrigue, in the detective story, in the rapid development of events, in the hunt, in the game, in courage, in flight.

Your ears should lift and your tail should twitch.

You yourself know what can captivate and amuse you. Everyone has their own, individual thing. Just don't get carried away with this surveillance. Don't harm anyone.

Method 5 Physical discharge

Everyone is familiar with this method firsthand, but, as usual, no one cares. And I remind you once again that rapid physical discharge, which includes:

walking,
swim,
general cleaning apartments (possibly someone else’s),
sex,
destruction of trash,
work in the garden,
dance,
mopping floors and washing by hand

relaxes twisted muscles and relieves stress and frustration fantastically effectively. General washing by hand even helps to cope with grief - again the advice of the old doctor, which I share with you.

Method 6 Come into contact with water

Washing dishes is a free session of hypno-psychotherapy. The sound of clean running running water relieves our fatigue and takes away with it all the “dirt,” not just household dirt.

In addition to washing dishes, there is a well-known classic: take a bath, take a shower, go to the sauna, go early in the morning or in the evening - swim in the sea, in the river, in the lake, in the spring. Refresh yourself, in short.

Method 7 Positive reframing of a stressful event

So much has been written about positive reframing (including by me) that I don’t want to repeat myself. I'll just give an example:

“It’s so good that it turned out that I won’t go anywhere this summer! I'm finally taking classes English language, for fitness and also for self-development courses! When else would I allow myself such a “useless” luxury? And in the summer there is low season everywhere and there are only discounts around. So I’ll save money too!”

Method 8 It could have been worse, it was even harder for others

Are you not satisfied with the outcome of the event? Imagine that there could have been a worse outcome. Imagine how bad it is for some people around you. If you master this art and stop turning your nose up at this strategy, then you will not need any psychotherapy at all.

Method 9 Laughter kills everything scary and terribly important

Ridiculing, reducing, vulgarizing something inflated and important - old recipe human culture, starting from the Neolithic. Thanks to grandfather Bakhtin for his term “carnival-laughter culture.” Read it, take an interest.

Or watch one episode about the adventures of SpongeBob Square Pants. When he was terrified of speaking at a school seminar, a smart squirrel gave him super glasses. Wearing these glasses, SpongeBob saw all the students and the teacher... in their underpants. That was funny! True, out of laughter, he never read out his report. And what kind of panties did the teacher have... Mmm...

Method 10 Counting to 10

Just read until ten. Slowly. Controlling your inhalations and exhalations. To myself, not out loud. This is the recommendation of doctors and sports trainers.

Method 11 Cry

Crying relieves stress. Those that leave the body with tear fluid toxic substances, which are formed under the influence of stress hormones. If you can’t cry about your own things, come up with a pitiful topic and specifically cry over it.

Method 12 Verbalization of everything that is on your soul

Pronunciation or verbalization is putting a vague “something” into clear words. However, great thing. Or better yet, write it all down on paper, write a long letter.

Just don’t send it anywhere!

Here are 12 tips for dealing with stress and the diseases that stress then causes.

These 12 are those that help us and do not require money for it. And the rest is expensive and from charlatans.

Hello friends.

Today I want to help all those who are often nervous, worried and suffer greatly from this. In this article, I will explain in detail how to stop being nervous and become calm.

Why will they help? Yes, because I myself used to often get nervous and worry about trifles, which caused big problems in life. And I spent a lot of time on the question of why we get nervous and how to get rid of it.

Having understood the reason and got to the bottom of it, I got rid of not only nervousness, but also all others.

Nervousness prevents us from living

I know that your anxiety brings you a lot of problems. Everyone knows the situation when we have an important meeting, interview or exam ahead of us and we need to have a clear head so as not to fail.

But out of nowhere, we are attacked by jitters, we shake, sweat, begin to fuss, or, on the contrary, we fall into a stupor and do not understand anything. Here she is main problem nervousness: instead of productive thinking, which is necessary at a crucial moment, we, on the contrary, begin to do stupid things, say nonsense, and simply do not know what we are doing.

Let's list the main disadvantages of a nervous condition and what it can lead to:

when we are nervous, we stop reacting correctly to the situation;
we cannot concentrate;
We don’t think well with our heads;
nervousness takes away vitality;
As a result, we quickly get tired and accumulate chronic tension.

And there are many more to list negative consequences such a state.

Sooner or later all this will lead to physical and mental illness.

After all, it is known that most diseases are caused by nerves, from improper functioning of our psyche.

When we are nervous, our blood pressure rises, our heart rate increases, our hormonal background. This is how the body reacts to a stressful situation. On short time this is justified, it is inherent in nature. But if we are nervous often and for a long time, a malfunction occurs in the body, and the imbalance within us does not go away and becomes chronic.

Often nervous people They give such a mysterious diagnosis as VSD (I was given this too).

In general, there is no such disease abroad.

And there is no point in treating it without eliminating the main cause of VSD - nervous overstrain due to frequent experiences.

Therefore, get rid of increased nervousness if you do not want to get sick, but want to be healthy and respond adequately in any situation.

We don't have to be nervous

Our path to eliminating nervousness will begin with the psychological attitudes that you must instill in yourself.

They will help you realize the true state of affairs and reduce inappropriate reactions to what is happening.

The first setting will be like this. Alone and in complete silence, close your eyes and say to yourself the following phrases:

“I will never be nervous again, because it bothers me and brings problems. I always remain calm, in any situation.”

Thus, you leave in your subconscious an attitude to fight your nervousness.

Next, you must understand that such a reaction of your psyche is not a natural, but a painful state that can and should be eradicated. Of course, when danger arises or when you are in an unusual environment, the body reacts by increasing the heart rate, releasing adrenaline and other stress reactions. This is how nature designed it so that we can either quickly run away or start attacking. But this reaction should be short-term and not cause so much pain and trouble to us and our body. And the stress reaction is delayed for for a long time due to improper functioning of our psyche, which leads to illnesses and other problems.

Therefore, the second installation will be like this. Say this phrase to yourself:

“My nervousness is not a natural reaction of my psyche to what is happening. But a normal reaction is when I calmly treat any troubles in life.”

Many people think that constant anxiety and a nervous state is their character trait, which cannot be changed, which means that nothing needs to be done. But they are very mistaken and make a big mistake. If nervousness is not a natural state, then you can ensure that your psyche works more correctly and you stop being nervous. Any character, any program in your brain can be changed, you just need to take charge of yourself, and know how to do it. So the last setting will be like this.

“I will change. I will win over nervousness, it will go away from me. I will have a different character, more calm.”

At first, try to find time every day and say these phrases to yourself. Over time, they will take root in your brain and do their job. But this is only the first step (but a very important one) in your fight against nervousness, so suggestion alone will not correct the matter.

The main thing is that you must understand and understand for yourself, consolidate in your head that we don’t have to be nervous, that we can and should get rid of nervousness.

Causes of anxiety

It is useless to get rid of nervousness without eradicating the causes of this condition.

And the root of anxiety is a wrong attitude towards life and an inflated ego. What does it mean?

We interact with the world incorrectly, we look at everything around us with distortion. To put it simply: with their own cockroaches in their heads, each with their own look. The main distortion, because of which we often get nervous and experience it very serious attitude to the situation.

When going to an important meeting or exam, we put our career and future on the line. financial situation or something else important to us. The subconscious contains a failed scenario with a terrible outcome, all this creates tension and, as a result, a nervous experience. To soften the tension, and therefore stop being nervous, you need to reduce, or better yet remove, the importance of the upcoming event. After all, in fact, this importance is mainly inflated, artificially created due to the wrong attitude towards life.

You need to treat everything more calmly, look at life philosophically. People have long come up with attitudes and well-known phrases that will help with this. For example, “come what may”, “to hell with it” and others. In fact, you need to easily accept your fate, any situation in your life.

Here another reason for nervous experiences appears. We are afraid of a negative outcome of an event, which means we are afraid of difficulties, afraid of losing. After all, not everyone can calmly endure failure, get up and move on. People usually give up after defeat and give up on their goals.

By becoming brave, accepting any outcome of an event, we take away the importance and stop being nervous about defeat. We know that even if we lose, we will learn from this and be more prepared in the next battle.

In other words, we are afraid of the difficulties of life and constantly hide from them.

That's why important advice: when going to a responsible event, you should not be afraid of a negative outcome and accept any event that happens. Let go of everything in yourself, relax and say to yourself:

“I accept everything that happens to me, what will happen, will happen. If I’m lucky, good, if not, well, that’s fate.”

Let go of the importance. Religious people are good in this regard. They blame everything on God, they trust him. And you trust this world, let it accomplish any event.

Of course, all this is not very easy to achieve. This requires work on yourself, but by realizing the wrong reaction to the environment, you can move yourself and live more calmly and happily.

And an inflated ego is when there is something wrong with us correct settings, negative traits character. Excessive pride, an increased sense of self-importance, or, on the contrary, self-doubt, give rise to the need for obligatory approval, praise and cause the fear of being ridiculed, of being left out in the event of failure.

For example, when a guy goes on a date for the first time, he has a strong fear of being rejected by a girl, ridiculed by friends, and other complexes. All this gives rise to strong excitement which the partner feels. Girls don't like insecure guys, and as a result, the date either fails or doesn't go as expected.

Therefore, be simpler, relax and everything will be fine.

Before an upcoming important event for you, you must instill in yourself the attitudes that I mentioned above.

Bring to your mind the fact that if you worry and are nervous, you will simply fail the whole thing. Take the importance off the event, don’t be afraid to lose, put your pride aside, be confident in yourself. Of course, all this is not easy to achieve. But the foundation will be laid, in a stressful situation the subconscious will remember this, and you will worry less. If this does not help, do not despair and think again about everything that I told you, instilling in yourself the correct attitudes.

Be aware

Usually a person understands that he shouldn’t be nervous, convinces himself that he won’t worry, tries to take the importance off the event, but as soon as he gets into a stressful situation, nervousness comes over him again.

The psyche and body react out of habit, and it takes time for them to readjust. It is important at such moments to catch ourselves being nervous and remember the correct settings. So be aware. Once nervousness has consumed you, try to distance yourself from it. Look from the outside at the feelings and emotions that have taken over you. The main thing is that you do not merge with your experiences, as is usually the case, but remember that you are getting rid of them. This helps a lot.

I will give an example of how to react in stressful situations. Let's say you made a mistake at work and your boss called you in for a showdown.

First, prepare for the meeting. Close your eyes and tell yourself the following:

“I’m not afraid that my boss will scold me, because I don’t care what he thinks of me. After all, no matter what I do, he can always find a reason to punish me. Should I then grovel before him and worry , thinking whether he will scold or not. After all, the main thing is that my colleagues at work know that I am a good worker, but most importantly, I know my own worth. After all, I am not a slave, but a free person. Therefore, I am not afraid of him and will behave. with dignity and calm. I take the importance off this meeting and accept any outcome of the event. Even if he fires me, well, that’s my fate. That’s what the world needs. There is always a way out, and I will definitely find it good job. If I behave calmly, my boss will appreciate it and see me as a worthy person. If I’m nervous, then on the contrary, the boss will stop respecting me and will certainly scold me or fire me.”

This is an approximate formulation, which will be different in each case. Use your imagination. The main thing is that you must take the importance off the event, not be afraid of defeat and accept any outcome. If you are calm, your head will be clear and everything will go fine. Otherwise, usually the employee is so worried about meeting the boss that he loses control over himself and makes mistakes, saying something he didn’t originally want.

But that's only half the battle. You will still be nervous during the meeting itself, although less so. It's OK. Just at this moment believe that you can be calm. But most importantly, don’t let your worries consume you. Try to look at emotions as if from the outside. Don't fight the anxiety, just let the feeling go and watch it, even if it grows. The main thing is to observe from a distance and observe again. Believe me, you will feel better and your nervousness will subside. The main thing is to train in the skill of observing from the outside, because... this does not happen right away.

The importance of the meeting will also decrease if you take it in a humorous manner. For example, imagine that instead of the boss, some funny goblin from a comic book is sitting in the chair, and you just grin at him. Come up with something of your own.

How to calm down with breathing

How to quickly calm down and get nervous? This will also help you a lot good welcome, stopping nervousness. This is a transfer of our attention to breathing and slowing down the respiratory rhythm. After all, when we are nervous, the breathing rhythm increases, becomes intermittent, and basically we begin to breathe through our chest. If you specifically start breathing with your diaphragm, i.e. stomach and slow down your breathing, you will stop the physiology of the nervous state and gradually calm down. But most importantly, you need to attach attention to the breathing rhythm. This way you are distracted from negative emotions, depriving them of energy, and they decrease.

Do this exercise in any stressful environment, unnoticed by others, and you will feel calmer.

By applying my recommendations, your nervousness will decrease and not cause you anxiety, and you will become calmer and calmer. The main thing is to work on yourself, react correctly to life, not be afraid of difficulties, and develop awareness.

How to find peace of mind everywhere and always

Following my recommendations, not everyone will be able to stop being nervous. The thing is that many people have a nervous system so weakened by everyday stress that this will not help them. Or rather it will help, but only a little. So what should we do? How to calm down and stop thinking about bad things?

It is necessary to strengthen the nervous system, bring the mind and psyche to a state of peace.

Our restless mind generates many negative thoughts and emotions, all of which are out of our control. This is where the anxiety and nervousness come from.

Lead a healthy lifestyle. The state of the nervous system directly depends on general condition the whole body. Healthy man in good spirits, feels more often positive emotions, less afraid and worried. There are many methods that are suitable for achieving health, which you will also learn about from this blog.
Stop using and. Many people believe that alcohol and nicotine calm and relieve nervousness. In fact, they only cloud the brain, blocking the perception of the source of nervousness, and also destroy nerve cells. Like an ostrich, you buried your head in the ground, became cowardly, and ran away from the problem. The problem has not gone away, but with alcohol and nicotine you have only weakened your nervous system. You have become weaker and you will endure the next stress much worse.
Learn relaxation techniques. This and . The relaxation acquired in them will gradually turn into daily life, and you will feel calmer about any troubles.
Get busy. Thanks to her, you will forever forget about anxiety and nervousness. It will clear your psyche of any distortions, you will find peace of mind and body. She will teach you how not to be nervous and control yourself.

I’ve already written a lot about meditation, so I won’t repeat myself. Follow the link and read.

By doing meditation, you will gain an incredible thing called greatest power peace. You will never fuss, but everything will work out for you. You will stop making mistakes because you will have a clear mind, not clouded by a fussy mind. If you want this, then meditate.

Be sure to read about fortitude.

By following these four points, you will stop being nervous forever and will be calm in any situation. But this, I repeat, is in the long term. The result will not come immediately. But I assure you, it's worth it.

That's all for today.

See you soon friends.

Be calm and everything will be fine.

And finally, calm music to relieve stress: