Healthy relationships in the classroom are an important and challenging task for teachers. It is necessary to build a tolerant attitude of classmates towards inner world each step by step. As it turns out, this is not a simple matter. And often the teacher does not have time to notice that something is wrong.

So what should you do if you are periodically bullied at school?

Find a person with whom you can openly talk to us about any topic. On the Internet, for example. Ask to evaluate the situation from the other side. Perhaps in this look you can find the answer. Exactly what to do.

Ask for advice. Perhaps he or she has also had similar situations or this person is familiar with this type of behavior. Being able to share your feelings rather than keep them bottled up always helps a lot.

The first thing you need to do to resolve this is to make it clear to the teacher that you are uncomfortable in the group. Aggressive behavior often interferes with concentration on studies. The same goes for ridicule or bullying.

In such situations, the student is hardly able to remember main goal schools - learn mathematics, physics or law. And it’s better all together and at a good level.

Of course, socialization during the school period is very important stage independent communication with the world of people. But first of all, children come to school to learn scientific disciplines, and the inappropriate behavior of classmates will interfere with this.

Before using the same means as the aggressors, try to find a connection. Again, don’t immediately push with your victim status. It is unlikely that this will help to find at least some contact.

Try to talk about something in general. Follow groups in the school cafeteria or at recess and try to be part of the conversation. Often, schoolchildren are divided into groups based on their interests, and in one of these you can find people to communicate with.

Try to find contact with these people. This way they can influence other children.

In general, try to avoid such situations in any area of ​​your life. Appreciate your nerves.

Of course, if you can't make connections and your personality remains an object of ridicule, you will have to learn to fight back. But to resolve the situation, there is also the school administration or director. Homeroom teacher, in the end.

Often, such student behavior simply remains outside the school walls. That’s why it’s difficult to see the offenders.

If the administration frankly does not want to be the judge of the conflict, consider transferring.

Don't show your fear or fear. It is precisely this uncertainty that bullies take advantage of in school hallways.

Say to yourself: “I am calm (at)”, “I am in control.” Control your voice, feel how you speak.

Of course, you will need to make it clear that you are prepared to protect your identity. But you must also understand this within yourself. Then the effect of self-confidence will be clearly visible.

However, you shouldn’t overdo it with self-confidence. Try to help, not do more harm.

Realize that it's not about you

Peers can count long nose or oddly shaped ears with something wrong. Understand that they have the right to think this way. But remember also that you have the same right to have a long nose or strange ears. And even be proud of them.

If you think that the problem of the conflict is in you, then you will always think that way.

But your “wrong nose” is your own business. Do not allow others to interfere with the structure of your body or character.

Explain to people who think differently that you will not make excuses about your physiological structure. Hint that no one is perfect. And so do the offenders.

Very often in our lives there are cases when we are faced with either outright anger, or rudeness, or barbs and mockery. Life can be poisoned by constant attacks from a colleague or some acquaintance, and sometimes it can drive you crazy aggressive behavior on the road, in a queue or on the subway. And for some of us, those who do not know how to quickly parry, the question arises: “What is the best way to behave: to nobly leave or to fight back with a caustic word?” The main thing is to learn to behave with the offender with dignity, so that he is ashamed and offended, and not you.

So, The first thing you need to start with is learning to control your emotions. And we may have the following: confusion, depression or aggression. Pull yourself together and say clearly to yourself: “You can’t show your confusion and run into the bushes,” “I can overpower myself and not show depression,” “I shouldn’t be silent with wet eyes or red ears,” “I won’t show my anger and irritation, as if I had really been touched to the quick, and I will not allow the offender to triumph.” It will be easier for you to do this if you imagine your opponent in some pitiful or funny way: an evil gnome, a yapping dog. Or put him in an aquarium and imagine that he is splashing his lips like a swollen ball fish, and you hear nothing, he is trying in vain.

The second point is to be able to give a worthy rebuff.“School of Scandal” is not such a nasty thing. You just need to be able to “slander” not with primitive offensive and well-known words, but beautifully and with humor, in order to preserve your “uniform honor” and leave others without arguments. You should not respond to rudeness with rudeness, although in some cases this is what helps, but more on that later.

If you periodically encounter the problem of “lack of resourcefulness” in the right situation, then prepare several phrases and arguments in advance: universal and situation-specific. What does this mean: the first are suitable in any situation and for any person, and the second should be thought about in advance if you know in advance that there is a high probability that your constant offender will probably go through such and such a topic.

For example, if some official in our thriving bureaucratic apparatus is rude to you, say: “I see from you that you have problems with women, but I have nothing to do with it, I just needed a certificate.” Or someone barked public place, answer: “You can see that life is difficult for you, but why take your anger out on me.” Of course, this is what you should do if you have nothing to lose except your own face, it is better to leave victoriously and not spoil your mood with failure.

But if you, coming to work with new bag, new or when preparing a new report, you are waiting for the next inevitable criticism, prepare in advance. Think about what exactly, at what nuance and in what key this criticism can be directed, prepare a refutation, evidence and the “point” that will be put after your remark. You can even consult with one of your friends and relatives: how they see this situation, what they would say in your place, how they would retort.

And the third point - when and to whom can you be rude and is it even necessary to do so? Of course, learning bad manners is not the most respectable thing. But, unfortunately, in our reality today there are more and more such subjects from whose behavior you need to be able to protect yourself. And, alas, they are often only affected by the same methods of “communication” that they themselves use.

So, first, think carefully about whether it’s worth saying anything to the offender at all. Sometimes people can be aggressive and can go so far as to use physical force, regardless of gender or gender. So sometimes it’s better to quietly leave and not look for adventures in a place that is familiar to us all.

If the “villain” is just an ordinary boor and does not pose a danger, and you don’t want to leave humiliated and insulted at all, then answer him in the same spirit, don’t be shy. Just concentrate all your anger, indignation and pour out your emotions on him in one fell swoop. Maybe even a couple of succinct words. Indecent? Think about it, did he behave decently when he told you about the same thing? So don’t be shy once again, and if the situation allows: a firmer voice, a stern face and a return “shot”. Believe me, after such a “release” of negative words, all your negativity will go away. Sometimes it’s better to let off steam, rather than accumulate resentment and anger inside yourself, and not feel trampled and humiliated all day.

Learn to control yourself, your emotions and find the strength to fight back with dignity and effectively, depending on the situation and those people who are trying to offend you. And you will see that in many ways life will become simpler and calmer. After all, the most important thing is not to transfer your resentment onto loved ones and innocent people, but to be able to give what they deserve to the one who is really to blame.

Arrogant people can be seen from afar. They can easily ruin your mood with their contemptuous attitude unless you learn to fight them back.

For some reason, arrogant people decided that they are somehow better than everyone else, when in fact, we are all equal and differences do not make a person worse or better than others. How you respond to people who treat you arrogantly reflects your ability to stand up for yourself.

9 ways to fight back against arrogant people

Arrogant people share the same personality traits as those with narcissistic personality disorder, according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, IV edition:
● A person believes in his own specialness and uniqueness, and also believes that only the same special and high-status people can understand him.
● Needs constant admiration from others.
● I am confident that everyone owes and expects him special treatment to your person.
● Uses others for his own gain.
● Characterized by a lack of empathy.
● Behaves arrogantly and arrogantly.

1. “Why did you decide this?”

Thus, the arrogant person will have to give logical explanation what he just said. He will immediately understand that his words are being questioned and will most likely remain silent, since you have reproached him regarding his behavior.

2. “Ouch!”

If an arrogant person hurts feelings, yours or someone else's, be direct. Thus, he realizes that he is causing harm to others.

3. “You know that my mother is ____, right?”

Arrogant people like to single out groups of people based on their nationality, sexual orientation, education, etc., and often use negative stereotypes. An arrogant person compares himself with others, while humiliating others and extolling himself.

You can easily stop him with one in a simple way: During a conversation, casually say that someone close to you belongs to a group of people that your arrogant interlocutor belittles. He will immediately understand that his words personally insult you and you will not tolerate it so easily. Most likely, he will quickly apologize and hasten to retreat.

4. “Are you aware that there are other points of view?”

Everyone has the right to their opinion, but arrogant people need to make it clear that not everyone agrees with their negative opinion.

5. “What makes you think that ____ is better?”

Arrogant people believe that they are better than others. Ask them to explain why they think they should be treated differently. You may hear a lot of interesting things in response, but, most likely, your interlocutor will begin to prevaricate, since you will make it clear to him that he is no better than others.

6. “It would be wonderful if these were your last words on this topic.”

End the conversation on the same rude note that the other person started it on. This way, you let him know that you are ending your conversation and stopping the flow of his speech. Nevertheless, arrogant people like to talk a lot and so you may need the following phrase.

7. “Shut up now”

There is one simple way to end a conversation with an arrogant interlocutor: just pick up and leave. However, before you leave, make him think about his behavior. There is a possibility that you will not influence him in any way, since such people think too highly of themselves and do not recognize criticism addressed to them.

8. I’m sure you didn’t mean to seem so arrogant, right?”

With this phrase, you imply that your interlocutor had good intentions, when in fact, they didn’t even smell like them. This way, you give him the opportunity to get away with it, but at the same time make it clear that you refuse to listen to him humiliate others.

9. “Do you realize how arrogant you sound when you say something like that?”

Point out your arrogant behavior and make it clear that you find it unacceptable. Psychologists who study character traits explain: “ Humble people are not focused only on themselves, while arrogant people have too high an opinion of themselves and cannot objectively evaluate themselves.” Arrogance is associated with calculating and manipulative behavior towards others in social settings.

Translation of the article - 9 Comebacks For Dealing With Arrogant People via Kluber

Instructions

If you come to work with a new hairstyle or handbag and you know that this may cause unfounded criticism from one of your colleagues, then simply tell her in response: “I knew that you would like it, you just don’t know how to hide your envy, you need to learn it.” .

Restless sleep. This can manifest itself in different ways: someone wakes up several times during the night, someone wakes up at dawn or, conversely, does not find the strength to get up. But each of these people equally does not feel rested.

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Useful advice

Each of these symptoms alone (except suicidal thoughts) does not necessarily correspond to depression. Several signs together should already make you think. In order to recognize depression, you can also use one of the many psychological tests, developed by specialists. But keep in mind: even a doctor cannot always accurately determine whether it is depression.

Sources:

• how to identify symptoms of depression

Tip 6: How to recognize depression in time and give it a worthy rebuff

If depression is not recognized in time and action is not taken, it can become protracted. A person faced with this unpleasant condition feels depressed, unable to take any action, and unnecessary. Prolonged depression, as opposed to ordinary sadness - serious problem, which can lead to dire consequences.

Instructions

Learn to recognize depression and distinguish it from sadness, grief, fears, etc. It is normal to worry and be upset, so it is natural for a person to feel bad after being forced to quit, or even after failing an exam. The difference is that sadness goes away over time, but depression can remain for a long time.

Try to identify depression. Start doing what you previously liked, meet friends, watch your favorite movies. If all this helps to lift your mood and distracts you from gloomy thoughts, then you are able to recover from the stress you have suffered. If you feel irritated, don’t want to see your friends, or your favorite hobby doesn’t bring you relief, most likely you are faced with depression.

Pay attention to your physical condition. Depression is often accompanied by increased fatigue, decreased performance, frequent headaches, unpleasant sensations in the heart area, insomnia, a sharp decrease in sexual desire.

Don’t try to force yourself to have fun, and especially don’t get angry when you can’t do it. This will only lower your self-esteem and make the situation worse. You shouldn't watch comedies or listen to funny songs if they don't help you lift your spirits and only disappoint you.

Use natural antidepressants, such as chocolate. It is also advisable to go for a relaxing massage if possible. Aromatherapy helps a lot: in particular, you can use oils of pine, sage, lavender, clove, rosemary, myrrh, cypress, and lemon. In extreme cases, you can take medications, but only as prescribed by your doctor.

Try to walk more often, in the summer - go to the beach and sunbathe. If possible, try to do physical exercise, since they contribute to the production of the so-called happiness hormone. Great option– yoga classes for, because they will not only provide physical activity, but they will also teach you to control your breathing, distract yourself from dark thoughts, and free yourself from negative emotions.

Tip 7: How to get rid of depression and start new life

Something happened in your life, and your whole life turned into a tragedy. How to help yourself in such a situation, how to stop worrying, increase confidence in own strength and start a new life?

Instructions

First, realize that everything passes. Everything that happens to you is temporary. And so does what happened now. Try to look into the future, noting all the positive things now. It's difficult in this state, but still calm down, take a deep breath and concentrate on something positive. If the cause of your condition was a love drama, then in order to start a new life, you need to let go of the situation and forgive all the insults to this person.

Second, make a list of the most urgent issues and problems that need to be resolved. Analyze the situation, write down all the necessary things that require an immediate solution. This often helps organize thoughts and feelings and relieve stress. And this, in turn, gives impetus to the beginning of a new stage in life.

Thirdly, seek support if you feel that anxiety and depression are overwhelming you more and more. Talk to relatives, friends or a psychologist. People who go through difficult times in society cope with stress more easily. Don't isolate yourself, you probably have friends who have experienced something similar, their advice may be useful to you.

Often, when everything in life goes wrong, we begin to blame ourselves that we did something wrong, that everything should be done differently. But we all learn from our mistakes, without them it is impossible to gain experience. No one did anything the first time, often those around us and life itself are simply unfair to us. Don't get carried away with self-flagellation. Focus on the fact that the difficulties that have arisen will help you become stronger and give you the opportunity to start a new life without repeating similar mistakes in the future.

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Depression is a psychological illness that is accompanied by bad mood. Depression can make a person irritable towards other people. Almost any case of depression can be stopped.

Instructions

To prevent depression from getting worse, you need to do something interesting. For example, visit a cinema or theater, go on a visit, ride a carousel.

Sports are the best way to cope with depression. You can find yourself a partner.

Under no circumstances should you leave a depressed person at home alone. You can get together with friends for a walk in the forest, barbecue or go fishing. Many people benefit from these activities.

In order to find a way out of depression, you need to sit down and analyze the situation. Having seen all the causes of problems, only then can depression be stopped

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Sadness caused by difficult life circumstances may visit you from time to time. Such conditions do not require special treatment. One has only to reconsider one’s attitude towards life, choose the right strategy of behavior, and problems can disappear, taking with them negative emotions. Unlike ordinary stress and minor troubles in life, depression will not go away over time without the help of a specialist. Therefore, it is important to diagnose it at an early stage and take the necessary measures.

Early signs of depression

A complete loss of interest in life and a reluctance to get up in the morning may mean that a person has become depressed. Such an individual goes to work with great displeasure, does ordinary things through force, and simply falls into a stupor and does nothing.

Among the physiological signs of the disease, sleep and appetite disturbances should be noted. And both in one and the other direction. A person may suffer from insomnia or, conversely, feel drowsy all the time. Sometimes a depressed person eats almost nothing and forgets about the need to take food, does not feel hungry, and in other cases he eats too much and often, as if he is eating something inside.

Even if a person previously led an active lifestyle, with the onset of depression comes physical apathy. The individual's movements become slow and unhurried. In general, a person tries to move as little as possible.

The first problems arise at work and school. After all, a person, even a very successful, quick learner and quick-witted one, in a state of depression, finds it difficult to concentrate on something and perform simple tasks. habitual actions. Memory and the ability to think coherently and logically deteriorate.

An individual who becomes depressed tries to remain alone and indulge in his dark thoughts. Unlike ordinary blues, neither changes in life, nor walks, nor friends will help in this state. More precisely, maybe they would help. But the individual sees absolutely no meaning in them and remains in the same state.

A depressed person has neither the desire nor the strength to somehow change his life. He doesn't see the point in making unnecessary movements. The world around us he's not interested. Communication with others becomes a burden.

Depression at an advanced stage

Over time, the depressive state worsens. A person stops taking care of himself, does not look after his own appearance. Neglect of hygiene products and at least some food culture are signs of depression at a later stage.

The individual becomes weak-willed. He is indifferent to what is happening around him, even if the events directly affect his life. A person has no desires, incentives, motives. He is half alive and seems to be in a dream.

If at the beginning of this condition a person might have thoughts of being depressed, later the individual’s mind ceases to resist the disease. They are starting to appear. In this condition, the help of a specialist – a psychologist or psychiatrist – is simply necessary.

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Tip 10: What the body may be lacking when depression sets in

Depression is one of the most common mental disorders. It is characterized by a decrease in mood, activity and interest in life. There are various theories explaining the causes of depression. Among them is a biological approach, indicating a lack of certain substances in the body.

Lack of mediators and neuropeptides

Information from the brain is transmitted from one nerve cell to another using mediators defined chemicals. A lack of three of them can contribute to depression: norepinephrine, serotonin and dopamine. Each of these mediators functions in a specific part of the brain. Norepinephrine promotes the transmission of nerve impulses through the pleasure centers, limbic system and hypothalamus. These structures are responsible for feelings, impulses and reactions to stress. Serotonin works in the centers responsible for anxiety arousal and sleep. Dopamine functions in the center associated with emotions.

The direct relationship between the depressive state and the content of these mediators has not yet been proven, therefore the content of one or another mediator can only be indirectly determined. Some patients showed quite high level norepinephrine, and not all patients were helped by antidepressants that increase its level. Thus, the role of norepinephrine in depression is controversial. The same applies to serotonin, the content of which is also elevated in patients. However, the majority still lack it. Dopamine levels definitely decrease.

In addition to mediators, neuropeptides may be related to depression. These substances affect perception nerve cells signals from the brain. These include endorphins, which are responsible for pain sensations and reactions to them. In depression, they are usually deficient, as is gamma-aminobutyric acid. This acid reduces anxiety. Some scientists believe that depression causes changes in all of the above chemicals.

Hormonal and sleep disorders

Disturbances in the functioning of the endocrine glands that produce hormones are also observed in patients with depression. Controlled from the brain endocrine system hypothalamus and pituitary gland. These brain centers use the aforementioned transmitters to transmit impulses: norepinephrine, dopamine and serotonin. With depression, the level of the hormone hydrocortisone increases, which causes increased mobilization of the body in stressful situation. This is due to dysfunction of the pituitary gland, which continues to stimulate the release of hydrocortisone, regardless of the degree of its concentration.

Some patients have a decreased level of growth hormone, which is associated with sleep disorders. Some scientists believe that disturbances in the biological mechanisms of sleep can cause depression. Patients with depressive disorder benefit from lithium, and lithium affects these mechanisms.

Secondly, cause for concern may be causeless irritability, bad mood for no reason, increased tearfulness and apathy.

Thirdly, a persistent feeling of hunger. If, on business or without work, your hands reach for the refrigerator, and all the food is consumed indiscriminately, then we can say with confidence that depression is taking place.

If you notice similar symptoms, you don’t need to immediately run to a doctor or psychotherapist; at the initial stage, you can cope with the disease on your own.

To overcome depression on your own, you need to follow a few tips from psychologists

Gray and dull colors in clothes and the surrounding space need to be replaced with brighter, more rainbow ones.

To overcome fatigue, you need to move more and get physically tired, no matter how strange it may sound. Every morning you need to start not with watching TV, but with a walk or light aerobics.

Entertainment, travel, meeting with friends and shopping - good way get rid of a depressing mood.

To avoid becoming overweight, you need to include more fruits and vegetables in your diet. They contain necessary for the body vitamins and microelements, which means they contribute to the rise of vital energy.

There is no need to isolate yourself; sometimes a heart-to-heart conversation with a loved one brings much more benefits than visiting a specialist.

Tip 12: Hidden or masked depression: main signs and symptoms

IN modern world different shapes depression affects everyone more people. Experts note that in lately the hidden form has become especially widespread depressive state, unconsciously masking itself with something. This type of depression is called masked or hidden. By what signs can you suspect yourself or someone loved one is this a disorder?

Signs and symptoms of depression behind the mask

The first thing to understand and remember in the context of latent depression is that, as a rule, the sick person is completely unaware of his current condition. He does not even allow the thought that there might be something wrong with his psyche. For a person, in the picture of his world there is no such thing as depression. He will look for other reasons and reasons why certain symptoms appear, or he will not pay attention at all to any changes in his condition until it becomes completely difficult.

Recognizing a hidden form of depression can be difficult even for doctors; data received from family, friends, and immediate circle can play a large role in making a diagnosis. It is often not difficult from the outside to suspect masked depression in a person if you know what points to pay attention to.

Somatic, physiological symptoms of masked depression

In many cases, a person's appetite changes in this state. The patient may consume many times more food than before, and the taste preferences. Depression is characterized by a craving for sweets, spicy foods, any bright and rich tastes, and exotic dishes. Also dominant is the desire to drink coffee or hot chocolate, cocoa more often, and regularly drink any alcoholic drinks. A person who previously could not stand sushi, but now constantly orders it for himself, may wonder why he has such a craving for seafood. However, the patient cannot accept the idea that unconscious depression is to blame for everything. Another option is almost complete or complete refusal of food. A person has to be literally force-fed.

Either your head is splitting, then your heel is hurting, then there is pressure on your neck, then breathing is hard and painful. For a patient with masked depression, algias are typical - these are certain painful sensations that can occur simultaneously in different parts of the body, without having an organic cause. For a depressed patient, it becomes a habit to constantly feel pain, which can become very aggravated in stressful or crisis situations, under the influence of nerves and experiences. The pain usually varies, from stabbing to dull and aching, with soreness usually present in several areas of the body or organs at once. Psychogenic pain can “walk” through the body in waves, disturb the stomach, then switch to muscles and joints, then affect the throat, etc.

Against the background of masked depression, changes hormonal background, they begin to work differently internal organs and systems, libido decreases. A person who eats a lot of food can lose weight. Often, against the background of hidden depression, the patient experiences symptoms of gastrointestinal or heart diseases. Depending on which organ (or system) is the weakest, imaginary violations will occur. The second reason: the physiological symptoms will be exactly the same as what disease (or diseases) the person is very afraid of. If a patient with hidden depression is very afraid that he will have problems with the liver, hidden depression will begin to emerge through this organ - typical symptoms of liver inflammation or cirrhosis will appear.

Despite the fact that latent (masked) depression most often shows itself atypically, non-standard symptoms of the disorder come to the fore; it is characterized by a decrease in motor activity, fatigue, and drowsiness. However, periods of depression can quickly be replaced by activity, insomnia, and vigor. Against the background of such changes, the patient’s mood changes very dramatically.

Psycho-emotional symptoms

1. Sudden mood swings, sometimes several times a day. Often, sweet foods, doing favorite things, or pleasant music have a positive effect on the patient’s mood.
2. Periodic affective outbursts. At certain moments, a patient with hidden depression may lose control of himself. This manifests itself in increased aggressiveness, hostility and irritability, or the person may burst into tears for seemingly no reason in a public place. After such episodes, a person usually feels very depressed and tries to find an excuse for himself.
3. Increased suspiciousness. Dominant abnormal hypochondria.
4. The appearance of symptoms of anxiety disorders. Symptoms of latent depression may include: panic attacks. Exacerbation of phobias and fears. In general, emotions seem to become brighter.
5. For a patient with masked depression, the presence of various obsessions is typical.

Other manifestations of depression in disguise

You can also suspect the development of a depressive state in a person due to the following reasons:

• desire to attract attention by any means, seeking help, support, approval;
• fear of criticism;
• tendency to generalize; a depressed patient avoids specifics in his speech; for example, if it serious condition lasts only a couple of weeks, he will insist that he has lived this way all his life;
• a penchant for existentialism and philosophizing; for a patient with hidden (masked) depression, strange searches for the meaning or hidden meanings of everything around him become typical;
• a constant desire to take any medications or herbs, in some cases even a simple placebo alleviates the patient’s condition;
• in the context of latent depression, standard symptoms of major depressive disorder are rarely dominant; as a rule, the patient’s speech is normal, not confused and understandable, not slow; motor activity usually present; consciousness is not confused, thoughts often have clear boundaries;
• Often a person with depression tries to hide his state of mind under a mask of positivity, he tries to help everyone, an incredible altruist awakens in him; at the same time, the person is very afraid of causing concern and upsetting the people who are close to him, therefore he tries to avoid complaints and demonstration of his condition;
• people with depression successfully and almost constantly look for excuses, only to be alone with themselves again and again, not to go on dates or parties; however, study or work can become those beacons that will support a person, since increased responsibility may dominate in him during a period of depression;
• refusing to think that he is suffering from depression, a person tries to independently find a way out of the situation, cope with his condition, and come up with something that could improve his well-being and mood; this is dangerous because at some point a depressed patient, whose self-preservation instinct may be reduced, will engage in risky activities and acquire dangerous habits, for example, drugs;
• in moments of depression, a person begins to look at the world differently; in the context of the patient's condition, the patient may unexpectedly become creative or his progress in creativity will be surprising.

Unfortunately, the culture of society is decreasing every year, so it is not at all surprising to meet boors in transport, in a store, or just on the street. However, it’s not as scary when random passers-by allow too much as those people you see every day. These could be work colleagues, bosses and even relatives. To fight back against such people, it is not enough to simply raise your voice or respond in kind, because such a reaction can cause many consequences. How to put a person in his place in this case? The easiest way is to use one of the guaranteed methods that will allow you to emerge victorious in any situation and not aggravate the conflict even more.

Learn to understand the situation

The first thing you need to do is not just choose any method that allows you to repel boors, but understand how best to act in a specific situation. Many people, having read some general advice, immediately try to put them into practice, which further aggravates the situation. You need to understand that, for example, if your manager is rude to you, then showing aggression or harsh language may well cost you your job. In this case, the whole struggle becomes completely pointless, because you could simply quit and never see such a person again without any dialogue or attempts to reason with him.

It is also worth understanding that if your relatives are rude to you, then the choice the right way most often depends on the specific situation. If you fail, you can turn even more numbers against you. For example, if you have a strained relationship with your mother-in-law, who constantly interferes in your personal life, any raised voices, insults and accusations can completely destroy your entire family, after which any struggle again becomes pointless. Therefore, you need to learn:

• Understand which method of resistance is best applicable in your situation;
• Weigh the advantages and disadvantages;
• Be absolutely confident in what you do and say;
• Use raised tones and rudeness in response in the rarest cases.

No. 1 Ignoring and silence

Do you want to know how to beautifully put someone in their place? Then learn to ignore it. Moreover, do not try to tolerate his rudeness by withdrawing into yourself. This will not only not stop most aggressors, but will even increase their zeal. You need to ignore as demonstratively as possible, expressing with all your gestures that you are above the situation in which you find yourself. For example, if you are constantly being pestered by your boss, try to ignore everything that is not related to your work, passing only those comments that are relevant.

It is not without reason that they say that calmness is an insurmountable obstacle for any boor. Therefore, remember that tolerating and ignoring are completely different things. Arm yourself and the number of unpleasant situations in your life will rapidly go to zero.

#2 Smile

Another powerful weapon that can often surpass even ignoring. If a conscious reluctance to react to third-party aggression or insults can cause a real attack of anger in a person, then a smile is a “weapon” on a completely different level. She rather suppresses the manifestation of aggression than reflects it on the boor. You may have probably noticed situations where some people just have to smile and all the negativity towards them instantly disappears.

You also need to understand that a smile is different from a smile. There are people whose smile can cause the opposite feelings. Also, do not mix a smile and a mockery; the latter is not the best best way pacification conflict situations. Finally, a smile suggests that even in the case of open rudeness, it is impossible to get a person to show the same emotions, therefore even the most persistent aggressor will very quickly lose interest. Thus, to put such people in their place, you just need to smile, thereby responding to their manifestations of rudeness. After this, it is unlikely that anyone will want to continue to behave in the same spirit.

#3 Mirror effect

One of the most universal methods, who works both in a team and in any public place. However, the only downside is that it requires people around you, even random passers-by. In a personal conversation, he acts much worse, although even in such a situation he cannot be called useless.

The basis is the reflection of all aggression on the one who generates it. For example, if something doesn’t work out for you at work and your boss, in front of the whole team, constantly puts you in an awkward position by making frequent comments, try to “return” everything back. You can publicly ask him to show you how to do it right.

Especially good this method works in cases where you are confident that you are right and know your business. Then, having tried to do something better than you, the aggressor will very quickly encounter the same problems. After this, he is unlikely to pester you, although such people often try to find another reason for showing rudeness. However, it is important to remember that any situation can be turned against a person, thereby getting rid of his boorish attitude. At the very least, it will keep him in line.

#4 Consent

As a rule, the expression of rudeness is most often designed to ensure that a person will not be able to fight back. You need to understand that real cowards who take advantage of power, the state of affairs, subordination and other conditions often behave this way. In this case, you can disarm the boor, not just by putting him in his place, but also by depriving him of any desire to continue. To do this, try to support him in every possible way and agree with everything he says. If there are slight notes of irony and sarcasm in your tone, this will further enhance the effect, but do not overdo it. Even the best way to fight back can lead to completely unexpected consequences if you go too far.

For example, if your boss tells you that you are incompetent, try jokingly agreeing with him. There will be no loss of dignity in this gesture, but you will be able to put him in his place once and for all. As a rule, such people expect in every possible way that in response to their accusations and aggression, they will begin to argue with them, swear, or show emotions. In this case, consent completely discourages the “attacker,” forcing him to stop all attempts to get at you.

№5 Psychological techniques and politeness

It's no secret that most often boors are notorious people who, for some reason, feel superior to others. That is why they can afford boorish statements and ridicule towards specific people. In this case, you should never go to their level and respond in kind. Politeness is one of the most powerful weapons that allows you to save face in any situation. Even if they are rude to you and use obscenities, try not to do the same in response. At a minimum, this will make it clear to the aggressor that you are excellent.

You can also use the so-called “Socratic Method”. It is based on a way to force the aggressor to answer questions that can only be answered with a strict “yes” or “no.” In such cases, it is very easy to lead the boor into a logical dead end. Simply put, he will shut himself up. For example, if you are constantly required to perform certain duties at work, without skimping on expressions, ask whether they are on the list of your job responsibilities. In addition, ask if you are paid extra for them? Such a move will easily discourage the boorish boss and all his nagging will be completely unsuccessful.

#6 Frontal attack

This is probably the most daring and even daring way to put a boor in his place, regardless of his authority. To do this, you just need to ask why a person allows himself to behave this way towards you and who gave him such a right. As a rule, most boors cannot answer this question, especially if it is asked in public. Even in the case of personal hostility, the aggressor will not have anything to answer or how to justify his behavior.

It is also important to understand that the question must be asked without expressing reverse aggression. Try asking in a tone that sounds like you're trying to find out where to find the nearest store. Keep cool, don't raise your tone, and any boor will not be able to resist such a formidable weapon.

#7 Always maintain dignity

Remember that sometimes looking decent in difficult situation much more important than shutting up another boor, even if you are forced to see him every day. Often people advise each other to start being rude in response, which is a fatal mistake. In this case, you will not only begin to become like a boor, but moreover, you will do it consciously. Instead, always try to be composed and show that you are in complete control of yourself. Also, feel free to use sarcasm, a sense of humor, and other types of “verbal weapons.”

Keep in mind that retaliatory aggression can lead to the conflict becoming physical, which can already cause problems with law enforcement agencies. In this case, any attempts to put the boor in his place with the help of fists will put you in an awkward and obviously losing position.