The most touching words for a deceased son. How to survive the death of your son: advice from a psychologist
Epitaph for a son
a few lines from the depths of my soul
The most beautiful and kind words, filled parental love, contains the inscription on the monument to his son. Laconic, emotional, touching epitaphs for your son will become a symbol of what you feel towards the angel whom you loved and raised and who now looks at you from heaven. The epitaph for the monument to your son will tell you in a few lines about what has accumulated in your soul.
Epitaph on the monument to his son
The book is not finished
The thought is not finished.
So suddenly and early, a life cut short...
***
Our dear son, I'm sorry
For all your earthly torments.
I'm sorry that you are not here, but we live,
Swallowing tears of bitter separation.
***
Let your boundless give
They will be wrapped in flower wrap,
May your serene dreams be bright,
How are you in our blessed memory.
***
We loved each other deeply
Loved deeply, forever.
Meet me, my dear cat,
I came to you forever.
***
I'm sorry that we are under the starry sky
Wear flowers to your stove.
I'm sorry that we are left with air,
No matter how much you inhaled.
***
You retired untimely,
Leaving us in sadness.
We mourn over the grave on the way,
And you will be with us forever.
***
Here is the love that life gave me,
Here is the sadness that wisdom brought.
***
Let us remain silent over your memory,
Concealing the loss of pain and bitterness...
***
Among the living he burned like a star,
He left and the world became empty...
***
You will not leave our life,
As long as we are alive, you are with us.
***
You are always alive!
Until the end of our days
We cannot come to terms with your loss.
***
Like birch sap is lost in the spring,
So for you we have sadness and tears...
***
What a pity that your life was so short,
But your memory will be eternal...
***
You lived, you loved, you were in a hurry to help others.
Left untimely...
We can't get back our losses
But today you are with us,
We firmly believe in this.
***
You left us in an instant,
But the pain remains forever...
***
You have done a lot in this life
And left his mark on the earth,
But you left us too early.
With pain in our hearts we pray for you.
***
You are not on earth
But in my soul forever
The memory of you will live on.
***
We are proud of your life
And we mourn your death...
***
If you leave, taking with you
All the warmth of the earth, the trembling of my heart,
The world will become empty, the light will darken,
You leave the pain and tears to me.
If you leave...
***
Enveloping me in boundless tenderness,
From heaven you send eternal love...
***
And on the face there is not a shadow of flour,
It was as if he was dozing.
He folded his weakened hands,
I pressed the cross with love.
***
Your eternal peace -
Our eternal pain...
***
You died only for the light
And in the memory of the family
A warm greeting with a smile
Your image lives dear.
***
How hard it is to find words
To measure our pain with them.
We cannot believe in your death,
You will be with us forever.
***
Your clear eyes closed early,
Left family and friends early...
***
Your earthly path
It was lined with thorns,
The heavenly path is decorated
Let it be flowers.
***
We can't bring you back with tears,
And our hearts are always with you...
***
We kiss your eyes
Let's cling to our favorite portrait,
And a tear flows down my cheek, There is no end to grief...
***
Let this sad silent granite
Your image will remain forever for us...
***
To give it to you...
***
We paved the way to you,
She was watered with tears,
Forgive me, my love, my dear,
That you and I broke up.
***
I often stand over your grave,
Watering flowers with bitter tears.
I don’t want to think, my dear son,
That you are in this grave.
***
Unexpected grief, unmeasurable grief,
Everything precious in life is lost.
It's a pity that life cannot be repeated,
To give it to you.
***
Can't express it in words
All the grief and sadness.
In hearts and in memory
You are always with us...
***
You tragically died
Without saying goodbye to us.
We remember you
Bitter tears.
***
You tragically died
Without saying goodbye to us.
We will remember you
Bitter tears.
***
You passed away
Without saying goodbye to us
And grief remains
Don't forget for years.
***
You left home
Without saying goodbye to us,
Leaving a long trail
Don't forget for years.
***
I'm sorry that I didn't save your life,
There will be no peace for me forever.
Not enough strength, not enough tears,
To measure my grief.
***
We love you
We are proud of you.
Forever for us
You are still alive.
***
The day your gaze faded away
And the heart stopped beating
Became the darkest day for us
And we can't come to terms with it.
***
When your clear gaze faded
And the heart stopped beating
Became the worst day for us
And we can’t come to terms with it...
***
Do not express grief
Don't cry any tears.
You are happiness and joy
He took it out of the house.
***
The warmth of your soul
Left with us...
***
Our pain cannot be measured
And you can’t shed tears...
We treat you as if alive
We will love forever.
***
We are without you -
Always with you...
***
Not in the days that have passed your life,
And in the days that remain in memory...
***
We love you
We are proud of you and in our memory
You are always alive.
***
There is no greater pain
There is no worse grief
Before yourself
Bury sons.
***
Still remained
Your footprint on the ground:
You passed away
But from the heart - no.
***
We know -
You can't be brought back
But your soul is with us.
You illuminate our life path,
And we are left with only eternal memory.
***
The dawn of your life has barely risen,
How evil fate
Your bright youth has been taken away...
***
Pilots don't die
They fly away and don't come back...
***
You are no longer here, but we don’t believe you
You are in our hearts forever.
And my pain from that loss
We will never heal.
***
It's so easy to imagine you alive
That it is impossible to believe in your death...
***
Accept the last earthly gift
Beloved son, husband, dear brother...
***
You passed away
Without saying goodbye to us.
We come here
With bitter tears...
***
You passed away
Without saying goodbye to us
He left us grief -
Don't forget for years.
***
Grief and sadness of your loss
They will stay with us forever.
What could be worse and worse
Losing a husband, son and father?
***
More than once you will remember me
And my whole world, exciting and strange,
An absurd world of songs and fire,
But among others, united, not deceptive.
***
Life flashed by and ended,
Cause death can't be stopped
But the memory of you remains,
And we will keep it.
***
You left us very early,
Nobody could save you.
There is a wound in our hearts forever,
As long as we are alive, you are with us.
***
We couldn't save you.
Having left everything, you went into eternity.
Immense sorrow, hearts hurt,
There is no end to our sadness.
***
No one could save you
Died early
But your image is always alive
We carry it in our hearts constantly.
***
No one could save you
He died early.
You are forever alive in memory,
You will be with us forever.
***
Your sweet image is unforgettable
He is before us everywhere, always,
Incomprehensible, unchanging,
Like a star in the sky at night.
***
Let the circle of life be inevitable
Until it's over,
We will remember you
And share my thoughts with you.
***
The century turned out to be painfully short
You left too early
But in our memory you will always be with us
Dear, beloved person.
All our pain cannot be expressed in words...
***
The century turned out to be painfully short,
But in our memory you will always be with us.
Dear, beloved person...
All our pain cannot be expressed in words.
***
You left this life instantly
Left us with pain forever...
***
To the one who was dear during life
***
Can't bear the grief
Don't cry any tears.
You are joy and happiness
He took it away with a glitch.
***
Words are powerless before grief,
He did not die, about whom the memory is alive.
***
Do not express grief
Don't cry any tears.
You are happiness and joy
Took it from home...
***
Oh, Youth!
I didn't have the strength to hold you back
AND
I have not tasted the wisdom of old age...
***
You have gone into the world of eternal dreams
And your soul will forever be calm,
And our grief and memory are limitless...
***
You are our short-lived joy
And eternal, burning pain...
***
Unfair and cruel
This is how fate treated you,
Gone so early, irrevocably
And it became empty without you.
***
Sorry, son,
That they didn't save you.
And before death, all words are powerless,
But the memory of you
Alive alive
In the hearts of relatives,
Both in daughter and son...
***
I wanted to see everything so much
I wanted to understand everything so much
All the love without a trace
Take it and give it right away.
On the threshold of the beginning
Halfway along the way
Death has done me part
From the desire to go further.
***
Your life's path was suddenly interrupted,
Family peace is disrupted.
But you will remain in our beloved hearts forever
Death has no power over family, over love and you...
***
You died too early
Words cannot express our pain,
Sleep, dear, you are our pain and wound,
But the memory of you is always alive...
***
Like drops of dew on roses,
There are tears on my cheeks,
Sleep well, dear son,
We all remember, love and mourn you...
***
You loved life
And I wanted to do a lot,
But the thread broke too soon,
Without letting you fulfill your dreams...
***
Bending low over your grave
I water the flowers with bitter tears.
I don’t want to believe it, my dear son,
That you are buried in this grave...
***
To the sound of the forests
And bird calls
Sleep my dear...
***
Like my dear son
You passed away early.
Left no hope
Only grief, tears and flowers...
***
You are too generously gifted by fate,
May perfection die with you...
***
To whom were you dear during your life,
To whom I gave both friendship and love
For the eternal repose of your soul
They will pray again and again...
***
To the one who was dear during life.
From those who remember and mourn.
***
The last gift of love and sorrow...
***
You can't forget
It's impossible to return...
***
How difficult it is for us to live without you,
You left us forever...
***
How much of yours remains with us,
How much of ours went with you...
***
It's time for the heart to be at peace.
The earth took its earthly possessions.
But how hard it is for us to lose you,
Come to terms with grief, live again...
***
Dear, how little you have lived,
Are you honest
Served the homeland
You were strong, brave, kind.
We remember, love and mourn...
***
You will live forever in our hearts
Relatives and friends...
For us he is alive and somewhere nearby,
In memories, in heart and in dreams
The soul is always alive, it knows everything
And he sees how we are suffering now!
In heaven there became more than one angel,
And this is obvious, I know for sure!
Today, tomorrow and for life
We remember, love and mourn!
I asked God to return everything,
It was as if he didn't want to hear me,
Passed short life path,
We won't be able to see you again...
When we met secretly,
When we played checkers,
Everything was cool then
You were with us Arkashka!
Now you're not there,
Imbued with sadness
I remember all the time
And I really miss you...
Perhaps you came
Well, for God's sake I ask you:
"You come to me more often,
I'm always looking forward to seeing you!"
I feel bad without him... Unbearable
I just exist, I don't live
Oh, Lord, give me some strength!
I don't ask for more anymore
Separation is cutting more and more, suffocating
No air. Only bitter blue smoke
All sounds strain the ear and soul,
And the world somehow became empty and gray
Closing my eyes, I imagine that he is nearby,
Will make your heart tremble in your chest,
His face with an empty and sad look
And quietly I whisper: "Don't go..."
The soul shrinks into a ball,
He was given a short sentence...
And he couldn't do much
Although I wanted to live and could continue to live,
But alas...
The time is over and life is too short...
And it’s not easy to part, but you can’t get anything back,
And a sharp knife for the heart...
And it’s better not to touch anything,
Wanted to help? well...
There's nothing you can do to help
And the strip of the knife will not grow together
You're dying slowly
You scream as if you're not breathing,
But all in vain... He left for another world forever...
You left, the whole world went dark...
my heart is beating barely audibly...
I don't believe you're gone.
Why did it all turn out this way?
You left, taking everything with you...
Tears froze in my eyes...
But in my heart there is only silent pain...
We will forever remember YOU...
Hearts burn and candles cry
According to our dear, dear ones.
And early in the morning, in the afternoon and in the evening
We remember them, yearn and mourn
We ask for eternal rest for their souls
Let's keep the love and memory
And we pray on our knees
And again we yearn and mourn.
All poems are for you, my angel,
Pain pierces them every word,
And the soul cannot find its peace
Until we are together again.
You will live in eternal memory,
And no matter what anyone says,
There, behind the cemetery fence,
The world keeps your memory.
People like you will not be forgotten so easily,
Your eyes will remain shiny with tears.
And for a very long time people will still be
Carry you bouquets of scarlet roses.
Are you sleeping. But everything is so unusual.
Everything reminds me of you.
And only the rain is so quiet, barely audible
Knocking. As if he were saying hello.
It's so hard for me to live without you,
And you - you tease and worry.
You can't replace me
The whole world... But it seems that you can.
I have my own in the world:
Deeds, successes and misfortunes.
I just miss you
For complete human happiness.
It's so hard for me to live without you:
Everything is uncomfortable, everything is worrying...
You cannot replace the world, -
But he can’t do you either!
Our loved ones don't die -
They return with warm rain.
They even return from paradise,
To see how we love and wait.
Running through the gardens and across the field,
Having watered both the flowers and the forests,
Having breathed plenty of native air,
They rise up into the heavens.
They rise up with evaporation,
Turning into a cloud again.
And they spill again - like a downpour,
To see our love.
Our loved ones don't die.
There was a man and suddenly he was gone.
His heart stopped beating.
Mom is crying, my beloved is crying,
What have you done, you ruined him.
But everything could have been different
And don’t help your grief by crying.
You don’t know how to continue to live,
Only during life do you forget to love.
I can't hear my native voice,
No kind, sweet eyes are visible.
Why was fate cruel?
How early you left us!
The Great Tribulation cannot be measured,
Tears won't help me,
You are not with us, but forever
You will not die in our hearts.
Nobody could save you
Died too early.
But the bright image is your dear
We will always remember...
When someone closest to you leaves,
Dear, beloved person.
The whole world will appear as a bitter drama
Where everything turns black, even the snow.
And never! Nothing in the world
The warmth of their hands cannot be replaced.
While you're alive, don't skimp
Give your love to your family...
You have gone into holy eternity,
And our pain cannot be helped,
And the name of pain is infinity...
You left us for another world - there,
From where there is no return,
Leaving a memory of yourself, love,
Sadness and pain of loss.
You reign in heaven,
And we should bring roses to the grave.
May the earth rest in peace to you,
And the soul - eternal peace.
Words cannot express the pain of loss,
Nobody knows when trouble will come.
Fate alone is to blame for this,
That You left us forever, forever.
May it be easy for you there,
And the memory of You will remain here with us.
Sleep well, swan's down to you,
And for the soul - the Kingdom of Heaven.
You have gone into holy eternity, and our pain cannot be helped,
and the name of pain is infinity...
You left us for another world - where there is no return,
leaving memories of yourself, love, sadness and pain of loss.
You reign in heaven, and we carry roses to the grave.
May the earth rest in peace to you and eternal peace to your soul.
The most beautiful and kind words, filled with parental love, contained epitaphs for his son. Laconic, emotional, touching - they will become a symbol of what you feel towards the angel whom you loved and raised and who is now looking at you from heaven. In just a few lines you will tell about what has accumulated in your soul.
The book is not finished
The thought is not finished.
So suddenly and early, a life cut short...
Our dear son, I'm sorry
For all your earthly torments.
I'm sorry that you are not here, but we live,
Swallowing tears of bitter separation.
Let your boundless give
They will be wrapped in flower wrap,
May your serene dreams be bright,
How are you in our blessed memory.
We loved each other deeply
Loved deeply, forever.
Meet me, my dear cat,
I came to you forever.
I'm sorry that we are under the starry sky
Wear flowers to your stove.
I'm sorry that we are left with air,
No matter how much you inhaled.
You retired untimely,
Leaving us in sadness.
We mourn over the grave on the way,
And you will be with us forever.
Here is the love that life gave me,
Here is the sadness that wisdom brought.
Let us remain silent over your memory,
Concealing the loss of pain and bitterness...
Among the living he burned like a star,
He left and the world became empty...
You will not leave our life,
As long as we are alive, you are with us.
You are always alive!
Until the end of our days
We cannot come to terms with your loss.
Like birch sap is lost in the spring,
So for you we have sadness and tears...
What a pity that your life was so short,
But your memory will be eternal...
You lived, you loved, you were in a hurry to help others.
Left untimely...
We can't get back our losses
But today you are with us,
We firmly believe in this.
You left us in an instant,
But the pain remains forever...
You have done a lot in this life
And left his mark on the earth,
But you left us too early.
With pain in our hearts we pray for you.
You are not on earth
But in my soul forever
The memory of you will live on.
We are proud of your life
And we mourn your death...
If you leave, taking with you
All the warmth of the earth, the trembling of my heart,
The world will become empty, the light will darken,
You leave the pain and tears to me.
If you leave...
Enveloping me in boundless tenderness,
From heaven you send eternal love...
And on the face there is not a shadow of flour,
It was as if he was dozing.
He folded his weakened hands,
I pressed the cross with love.
Your eternal peace -
Our eternal pain...
You died only for the light
And in the memory of the family
A warm greeting with a smile
Your image lives dear.
How hard it is to find words
To measure our pain with them.
We cannot believe in your death,
You will be with us forever.
Your clear eyes closed early,
Left family and friends early...
Your earthly path
It was lined with thorns,
The heavenly path is decorated
Let it be flowers.
We can't bring you back with tears,
And our hearts are always with you...
We kiss your eyes
Let's cling to our favorite portrait,
And a tear flows down my cheek, There is no end to grief...
Let this sad silent granite
Your image will remain forever for us...
To give it to you...
We paved the way to you,
She was watered with tears,
Forgive me, my love, my dear,
That you and I broke up.
I often stand over your grave,
Watering flowers with bitter tears.
I don’t want to think, my dear son,
That you are in this grave.
Unexpected grief, unmeasurable grief,
Everything precious in life is lost.
It's a pity that life cannot be repeated,
To give it to you.
Can't express it in words
All the grief and sadness.
In hearts and in memory
You are always with us...
You tragically died
Without saying goodbye to us.
We remember you
Bitter tears.
You tragically died
Without saying goodbye to us.
We will remember you
Bitter tears.
You passed away
Without saying goodbye to us
And grief remains
Don't forget for years.
You left home
Without saying goodbye to us,
Leaving a long trail
Don't forget for years.
I'm sorry that I didn't save your life,
There will be no peace for me forever.
Not enough strength, not enough tears,
To measure my grief.
We love you
We are proud of you.
Forever for us
You are still alive.
The day your gaze faded away
And the heart stopped beating
Became the darkest day for us
And we can't come to terms with it.
When your clear gaze faded
And the heart stopped beating
Became the worst day for us
And we can’t come to terms with it...
Do not express grief
Don't cry any tears.
You are happiness and joy
He took it out of the house.
The warmth of your soul
Left with us...
Our pain cannot be measured
And you can’t shed tears...
We treat you as if alive
We will love forever.
We are without you -
Always with you...
Not in the days that have passed your life,
And in the days that remain in memory...
We love you
We are proud of you and in our memory
You are always alive.
There is no greater pain
There is no worse grief
Before yourself
Bury sons.
Still remained
Your footprint on the ground:
You passed away
But from the heart - no.
We know -
You can't be brought back
But your soul is with us.
You illuminate our life path with it,
And we are left with only eternal memory.
The dawn of your life has barely risen,
How evil fate
Your bright youth has been taken away...
Pilots don't die
They fly away and don't come back...
You are no longer here, but we don’t believe you
You are in our hearts forever.
And my pain from that loss
We will never heal.
It's so easy to imagine you alive
That it is impossible to believe in your death...
Accept the last earthly gift
Beloved son, husband, dear brother...
You passed away
Without saying goodbye to us.
We come here
With bitter tears...
You passed away
Without saying goodbye to us
He left us grief -
Don't forget for years.
Grief and sadness of your loss
They will stay with us forever.
What could be worse and worse
Losing a husband, son and father?
More than once you will remember me
And my whole world, exciting and strange,
An absurd world of songs and fire,
But among others, united, not deceptive.
Life flashed by and ended,
Cause death can't be stopped
But the memory of you remains,
And we will keep it.
You left us very early,
Nobody could save you.
There is a wound in our hearts forever,
As long as we are alive, you are with us.
We couldn't save you.
Having left everything, you went into eternity.
Immense sorrow, hearts hurt,
There is no end to our sadness.
No one could save you
Died early
But your image is always alive
We carry it in our hearts constantly.
No one could save you
He died early.
You are forever alive in memory,
You will be with us forever.
Your sweet image is unforgettable
He is before us everywhere, always,
Incomprehensible, unchanging,
Like a star in the sky at night.
Let the circle of life be inevitable
Until it's over,
We will remember you
And share my thoughts with you.
The century turned out to be painfully short
You left too early
But in our memory you will always be with us
Dear, beloved person.
All our pain cannot be expressed in words...
The century turned out to be painfully short,
But in our memory you will always be with us.
Dear, beloved person...
All our pain cannot be expressed in words.
You left this life instantly
Left us with pain forever...
To the one who was dear during life
From those who remember and mourn.
Can't bear the grief
Don't cry any tears.
You are joy and happiness
He took it away with a glitch.
Words are powerless in the face of grief; he is not dead whose memory is alive.
Do not express grief
Don't cry any tears.
You are happiness and joy
Took it from home...
Oh, Youth!
I didn't have the strength to hold you back
AND
I have not tasted the wisdom of old age...
You have gone into the world of eternal dreams
And your soul will forever be calm,
And our grief and memory are limitless...
You are our short-lived joy
And eternal, burning pain...
Unfair and cruel
This is how fate treated you,
Gone so early, irrevocably
And it became empty without you.
Sorry, son,
That they didn't save you.
And before death, all words are powerless,
But the memory of you
Alive alive
In the hearts of relatives,
Both in daughter and son...
I wanted to see everything so much
I wanted to understand everything so much
All the love without a trace
Take it and give it right away.
On the threshold of the beginning
Halfway along the way
Death has done me part
From the desire to go further.
Your life's path was suddenly interrupted,
Family peace is disrupted.
But you will remain in our beloved hearts forever
Death has no power over family, over love and you...
You died too early
Words cannot express our pain,
But the memory of you is always alive...
Like drops of dew on roses,
There are tears on my cheeks,
Sleep well, dear son,
We all remember, love and mourn you...
You loved life
And I wanted to do a lot,
But the thread broke too soon,
Without letting you fulfill your dreams...
Bending low over your grave
I water the flowers with bitter tears.
I don’t want to believe it, my dear son,
That you are buried in this grave...
To the sound of the forests
And bird calls
Sleep my dear...
Like my dear son
You passed away early.
Left no hope
Only grief, tears and flowers...
You are too generously gifted by fate,
May perfection die with you...
To whom were you dear during your life,
To whom I gave both friendship and love
For the eternal repose of your soul
They will pray again and again...
To the one who was dear during life.
From those who remember and mourn.
The last gift of love and sorrow...
You can't forget
It's impossible to return...
How difficult it is for us to live without you,
You left us forever...
How much of yours remains with us,
How much of ours went with you...
It's time for the heart to be at peace.
The earth took its earthly possessions.
But how hard it is for us to lose you,
Come to terms with grief, live again...
Dear, how little you have lived,
Are you honest
Served the homeland
You were strong, brave, kind.
We remember, love and mourn...
You will live forever in our hearts
Relatives and friends...
We love you, we are proud of you,
And in our memory you are always alive...
You died too early
Words cannot express our pain,
Sleep, dear, you are our pain and wound,
But the memory of you is always alive...
So I reached the finish line,
Life is behind us, infinity lies ahead...
Everything is behind: and the moments of flight
And young, crazy carelessness...
And the pain of the wounds and the pain of loss
They merged into one a long time ago.
I believe there will be a day of reckoning
For this vile war.
No one could save you
Died early
But your image is always alive,
We carry in our hearts constantly...
My mother lost her son.
Not even that. My brother, the eldest, went missing.
On the one hand, it's better than death. This is a lifelong wait, mixed with hope: what if he returns?
On the other hand, it is worse than death. This is uncertainty delayed in time, a portion of daily torment, an unfinished point, an unfinished sentence. This is a rebellious soul that refuses to believe in death and finds no reason to believe in life.
After her son disappeared, my mother took the steps down every day into the cellars of the mind. Simply put, she was going crazy. But this became clear later, when the depth of the problem became visible to the naked eye. And at first everyone decided that my mother’s character had simply deteriorated. Mom looked like an ordinary person, went to work, dressed up in dresses and even painted her lips a scarlet poppy, but madness was brewing inside her.
At first it was almost asymptomatic. Mom could not forgive those around her for the worthlessness of their problems. Against the background of the child's death, all other people's problems faded like a winter day after noon. Mom hated everyone a little because they were worried about two children, utility bills and the weather. She was rude, unrestrained and dismissively arrogant.
Mom wanted to go up to every person in the world and slap them in the face. Wake up! Your baby is alive! Here he is, next to him, in a hat and one mitten, ruddy from the frost, sniffling. Here he is. Do you see? Live, you fool! And you are talking some nonsense about an old sheepskin coat, sour salad and problems with repairs.
People around are tired of my mother's inspired suffering. They thought it was time to calm down and get over it. It is easy to set limits on someone else's misfortune without feeling the vastness of its boundaries.
“Nina, that’s enough already,” they said to my mother as her tears flowed for no reason. - Well, 10 years have passed...
I also judged my mother. I got the most out of her suffering. I was deathly tired of them.
A year later I learned that the volume of my sympathy is limited. And I don't have it anymore. And I wanted to say: “Nina, that’s enough already...”, but I couldn’t. I was already guilty before my mother for not suffering myself: I saw my brother several times in my life, due to the fact that we grew up in different cities, and didn’t feel any sense of loss.
I was sad that I was alone in the family, but it was more like selfishness: why should I alone endure a dysfunctional family? It would have been easier with two people. Where did you run off to, brother?
It seemed to me that the years that quickly fly by, emptying tear-off calendars, should have long ago dusted off the pain. It’s not for nothing that they say: “How many years, how many winters!” Winters cover the pain with snow, autumns fill it with rain, springs distract with drops, summers with the intoxicating berry smells of happiness.
But my mother stubbornly held on to the pain of loss. I always mentally returned to that day, which could have been lived differently, and then, perhaps, my son would not have disappeared. The day that derailed her life. That day before which there was life, and after which there was forced living out the time allotted by God.
Mom lived in the subjunctive mood. In the particle “Would”. What if I hadn’t left?.. What if he hadn’t disappeared?…
My mother appointed me as the sponsor of her life. That’s what she said: “If you weren’t there, I wouldn’t have waited a minute...” Mom hinted that since she was suffering because of me, then I, weighed down by responsibility, should study well and not upset my mother. I would like to note that my mother was upset by everything that brought me joy: sunrises met with friends, and the first crazy loves.
My diaries did not have grades lower than an A, I was diligent to the point of nausea, so correct that if my daughter was even a tenth like me, I would shake her by the shoulders and say: “Daughter, die away!!! Live, live, do you hear?” But this was my price for my mother’s life, and I paid it regularly. I had no right to extinguish my mother’s suffering, I followed his lead and lived by his rules. Until the moment of “rebellion by marriage,” but that’s a completely different story...
One is mine good friend experienced a similar tragedy. Her brother died. Drowned. Just here it was on Tuesday, and on Wednesday - curtained mirrors and mother without a face. My friend, Valya, was eight years old when this happened. She honestly cried for her brother for a week, but then she was distracted by the copy books and the new playground in the yard. And nothing could distract mom. Mom went to the cemetery as if she were going to work. Every morning. In a black scarf, tied so low that the crying eyes are not visible. Mom didn’t know how Valya studied or what she ate. Mom knew that her son was no more, and this knowledge filled her soul one hundred percent.
They say that on the fortieth day the soul of the deceased leaves the house. Coming from the cemetery that day, my mother realized that she could not breathe. Just like her son couldn't breathe. There, under the water. Mom called Valya, who was doing her homework in the next room, and said:
- Valya, I want to die. For me, living like this is unbearable. It really hurts, you know?
Valya didn’t understand. She was very sad without her brother, she often cried, but it didn’t hurt. It was a shame. Why don't you play with me anymore, brother?
- I’ll make an agreement with Aunt Masha, she won’t leave you, she’ll adopt you after my death...
Valya regained her sight. She realized that her mother was saying goodbye to her. Like the day when she was leaving for Moscow for three days and explained to her and her brother that there was a pan of cabbage rolls in the refrigerator, and that at night they should double-lock the door. And now my mother is leaving again, only this time forever. He goes to his brother.
Valya began to cry from fear and resentment.
- What about me, Mom? – Valya asked.
- What about you?
- I will feel very bad without you. There will be two of you THERE, and I will be alone here. Aunt Masha smells like vinegar, I don’t want to live with her. Then take me with you... I want to go with you.
Mom was frightened by Valya’s words. She thought: “As if we were discussing a trip to the seaside...”
- How much time do you need? – Mom asked busily. It was implied: for me to stay nearby. Support your childhood with your adult shoulder.
- Until I grow up.
- How much is this?
- Don't know.
- Fine. I will live with you until I am 16 years old. That's eight more years. Next - herself.
We made a deal.
For eight years Valya lived with her mother. That's right. Not “with mom,” but with mom. Mom still went to the cemetery to visit her brother every day and did not know how her daughter lived. But there were cabbage rolls in the refrigerator, and at night my mother sewed custom-made fur products, for which they paid well. There was enough for cabbage rolls.
People, meeting Valya’s mother in a black mourning scarf, said, frowning: “Well, stop wandering around the cemetery already. Think about your daughter!” And the mother answered: “I agreed with my daughter on everything.”
On Valya’s sixteenth birthday, her mother gave her a fur coat made from different pieces of fur. Valya was happy and a little regretted that the late, slushy autumn did not allow her to try on new clothes immediately.
Valya asked for time off to celebrate her birthday with friends. Among them was black-haired Vanechka. Valina's first love. They partied until midnight. Vanechka accompanied her to the entrance and kissed the birthday girl for a long time in front of the door.
And in the morning Valya was woken up by the local police officer. He was very young, slightly over twenty, and for the first time he had to tell his family terrible news.
Mom drowned. In the black cold autumn water lake, the same one that took her brother from her.
Orphaned Valya looked at the district police officer, whose resinous hair had begun to show the first gray hair, who was crying with horror and fear of being in her place.
“Don’t cry,” said Valya. - Mom and I agreed on everything...
Now Valya is already an adult. She married Vanechka and lives with him for many years. Vanechka, or rather Professor Ivan Kuzmich, asked Valya for a long time to give birth to his son. But Valya is against it.
Valya will deceive fate and will never give birth to someone whom it hurts so much to lose. It hurts to death. Valya will be more cunning than fate.
No, Vanya, you won’t have a son with your middle name. No, Ivan Kuzmich, don’t even think about it. And this is not selfishness. It's an experience. I am already saving you today from the day when a gray-haired twenty-year-old policeman rings your doorbell...
What if he doesn't call? – Vanechka is worried.
Silly. There is no subjunctive mood. And if, yes, there were mushrooms growing in my mouth...
The main question that has tormented Valya all her life: that night when she, with lips swollen from kisses, tiptoed past her mother’s room, was her mother no longer there? Or was it still there?
And if she came in and hugged her, shared her happiness, would she change her mind about going on a date to the oil-black, uncomfortable lake of death? Or…
My friend Natasha recently lost her son completely. In an accident. Ridiculous. Stupid. Suddenly.
I missed everything. I treated my daughter. I had no time for other people's tragedies.
Now I am slowly returning to life. I'm very lucky. My daughter is alive and almost healthy. And he lives most of the time in a great mood.
And Natasha, step by step, step by step, descends into the basements of the mind. Writes long posts about afterlife. Presents “fair” claims to God. Natasha was surprised to learn that her righteous life is not a guarantee of the absence of tragedies. What's wrong good people bad things happen. That justice does not exist.
Why did her handsome and promising son, talented and kind, die, while the neighbor sitting next to him, a drug addict who regularly took away his elderly mother’s pension, escaped with a broken collarbone? Why not the other way around?
Sometimes it seems to Natasha that even the elderly mother of a drug addict would prefer “the other way around”... Lord, why did you decide otherwise?
“Talk to her,” friends ask for Natasha. - You know how... My daughter stayed there. Seven years. We have to save it somehow...
What can I do? The words are the same. I don't have any others. I can't do anything like that. I speak ordinary words. Just sincerely. With all my heart. And it seems that these are special, the right words. But no. I'm just speaking from my heart.
But I don’t know what to say to a mother who has lost her son. Forgive me, Natasha. It doesn’t seem that if I come to you with my “special” words, you will tell me: “Your daughter survived. What do you know about the pain of losing a child?” And all my words will be broken against this truth.
Nothing. I don't know anything, Natasha. You're right. God loves me, weak, and sends only those trials after which I can breathe. And smile.
But, you know, Natasha... THERE he feels good. It doesn't hurt. And here you are in pain. But that means it has to be done so that it hurts, Natasha.
Pain is a trainer. Trainer of all other senses. Pain mercilessly, without sparing tears, trains the desire to live, develops the muscle of love.
Be patient, Natasha. How many? Don't know. I don’t know how many years, how many winters... As long as you can, Natasha. To the brim.
Just know, Natasha, you don’t have to live in “By”. Everyone has their own path. And it must be passed without “B”. To die while alive is even worse than death. Walking around the world without a face, with empty eye sockets gouged out by grief, is... dishonest. Understand? This is deception. Yourself.
And if someone from above gives you a priceless gift that you don’t need right now - life, take it. Please take it. And live. Live, okay? For what? Don't know. Well, make up your own mind. Well, at least for the sake of not ruining the fates of those who love you, those who are turning gray from the inability to ease your pain, those who are so desperate to earn stupid A's to make you happy.
What did your daughter eat today, Natasha? What was she given in math?
And if you already live, live honestly. Bright. Juicy. It's like it doesn't hurt. As if grief hasn't taken away your ability to love and feel. Don't move to "BY" Nothing, nothing will change your “Would”. This is fate. You can’t get around her with your “By”, you can’t deceive her. Do not mentally rewrite the rules of fate. You can't regret anything. Today, live today. In an apartment, not in a cemetery. Laugh. Cry. Farewell. Give thanks. Dress up. Paint your lips a scarlet poppy.
And if pain squeezes your throat and the black lake of death beckons with its oily depths, save yourself with the thought that... IT doesn’t hurt THERE. It's good there. Everyone. And you will feel good. When the time comes. Don't rush it. Don't rewrite the rules of fate. Follow this path to the end. And your “good” will wait for you. You just live. And passionately, with all your might, worry, I ask you, about two children, utility bills and the weather.
Learn to sincerely worry again about all sorts of, God forgive me, nonsense. And give birth to Vanya a son. Give birth. Please. Do you think those who give birth to children are not afraid of calls from gray-haired police officers? Everyone is afraid. It's just that life isn't just about waiting. bad news. This is completely different. These are deuces in the diary. Utility payments. Sour salad. And the weather. From year to year.
Snow, rain, drops and berry happiness.
So many years. So many winters.
A letter arrived in my email inbox from a grieving mother. Over the years, she managed to survive the death of her son, and now she is ready to support others in this grief.
My name is Valentina Romanovna. 53 years old, from Moscow.
I was probably able to survive the death of my son, but as soon as I talk about it, I begin to understand that this is impossible.
When death comes tragically, you are pierced by blinding shock, sobbing and the need to organize a funeral “with strong pills.”
You are already experiencing the death of your son, being in a soulless, half-dead stupor.
I will say frankly that I had an only son, and my relatives supported me with all their might.
All gray-haired and instantly aged, the husband did not leave a single step.
My friends fiddled with ammonia, helping me survive the loss in silence.
It is impossible to find words, and only a few people are capable of this.
After my son's funeral - 9 days. Wake.
I deny, I don't believe this happened. Now the door will open, and the son will enter the room, and this terrible torment will end.
At this stage (9 days) it is simply impossible to realize that the son is already resting in the grave.
Everything reminds you of him, and you worry that you won’t survive this grief.
As a mother, I was overcome by despondency, I went into the depths of my soul, gradually beginning to understand that these were not nightmare visions.
After nine days, my husband and I were left alone. They called us and continued to express their condolences. Acquaintances often came, but I drove everyone away - this is our personal grief.
On days 10-30, I wanted only one thing - to be reunited with my beloved son as soon as possible.
I was sure that after his death I would not last long. And this, oddly enough, gave me stingy and ruthless hope.
They say that you need to throw away (take away from your eyes) all things that remind you of your son.
My husband did just that, leaving photographs as souvenirs.
Consolation did not come, I lost the meaning of life, somewhere in my mind I understood that I was obliged to share this cross with my husband, who could barely control himself.
Yes, I forgot to say, when our son died, we were 33.
We sat in an embrace and reassured each other. They lived on their parents' money. And it was even harder for them - their only grandson left forever.
On day 40, I felt that I had “let go” quite a bit.
They probably really say that the soul flies to heaven, leaving loved ones and relatives.
I continued to worry, but it was a slightly different stage of grief.
You can’t bring your son back, and I finally believed it.
Only after this, my body (guardian angel/psyche) - I don’t know exactly, began to pull me “from the other world.”
I have lost weight, aged and haggard. She began to “peck” little by little, without appetite or pleasure.
My husband and I went to the cemetery, and then I felt bad again.
The experience of the death of my only son came in leaps and bounds, and merciless time was the healer.
It can cut burrs from the soul, and in some incomprehensible way connect the sufferer with people who have also experienced the loss of a child.
For about six months I didn’t want anything, avoiding any desire.
When the feelings dulled a little, I began to go out into the street, answering questions with an unambiguous answer.
So a year passed. I got a job light work, holding his son's death deep inside.
Two, three, four, twenty years...
It is impossible to survive the death of a son. You don't live, you just go on living.
Images are erased from memory, mental wounds heal, but grief still returns - unannounced and piercingly.
You'll forgive me for rambling.
But I still don’t know how to survive the death of my beloved son.
Valentina Romanovna Kiel.
The material was prepared by me, Edwin Vostryakovsky.
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Number of reviews: 96
After what happened, my husband and I were left alone, truly orphans.
Everyone left us: relatives, acquaintances, employees; it is generally inappropriate to talk about friends.
Everyone said that they were in shock, did not know what to tell us, and went to their calm, prosperous, happy life mind your own business.
Our only son, who was 27 years old, died in an accident, or rather his car was destroyed by a MAZ, an hour was cut out of the Ministry of Emergency Situations car, then an hour was taken to the hospital, 8 hours of intensive care, and our decent, correct, honest, responsible child left...
There were no tears for a month, no understanding, no perception...
We, always so independent, suddenly felt the need for people, but they weren’t around...
I began to look around for people like me, those who had already experienced this...
You can only talk to those who understand what grief this is!
You wake up in the morning and it seems like you dreamed it, and then you realize that reality has not gone away.
You ask questions: WHY, FOR WHAT, HOW TO LIVE NOW?
There will be no children, there will be no grandchildren - this is unnatural for human life!
The pain is overwhelming more and more often, and you wash yourself with tears more often...
Everything was for the sake of him, my son, and the psychiatrist said that we had to live our own lives. And in the church - to love only God...
They take the best: my son died on Trinity...
I experienced the passing of my only son.
And they gave me the same advice. I try to live my life, but this is not life, but a parody of it.
I don’t go to church anymore, because, in my opinion, “material gain” rules the roost there.
Soon it will be 3 years.
Nobody will give you advice.
You are left with your husband, which means you have someone to take care of.
I was left completely alone.
As long as you live, the memory of your son lives on.
The hour will come and you will go to your son, I don’t know what it will be - a meeting in Heaven or nothing at all, but the fact that you will lie in dust with your son is for sure.
But the pain will not go away, it will only become less acute.
He was only 19 years old. And although everyone tells me that you are strong and I need to live on, I don’t have the strength to live.
I want to see my beloved son, and no words will help here.
I also stopped going to church, and I only think about meeting my son.
Life is now like behind glass.
I look around and don’t understand what I’m doing here.
Why should I be here?
Neither work, nor friends, nor family helps.
It’s as if a door has slammed shut behind which there is laughter, joy, happiness and pleasure from the small joys of life.
Life is over. Only fragments remained.
My son died.
He was 24 years old.
All these years I lived with him, for him.
I don't know how to live without him.
Yes, it turns out I’m not the only one, I’m 28 years old.
I'm slowly going crazy too!
Marina comments:
I'm slowly going crazy too!
I beg you, hold on.
Even though I utter empty words.
For all my sins, forgive me.
Hello!
He was only 25 years old.
God! How painful and difficult!
No one will console you - neither friends, nor family.
I really understand everyone who wrote here.
It is impossible to survive this, no amount of time can heal.
There's no point anymore.
There is no point in putting things away and the portrait, the child is always in the soul and in the heart.
Marina comments:
Hello.
I read your letter and am choking on tears.
In August, my only son Maxim was killed, and my whole life lost its meaning!
I just want to know one thing - will we meet there? And nothing more!
It hurts so much - words cannot describe it...
Good evening.
I am one of those mothers who have lost their children.
I still can’t find the strength to start living, even though I still have a daughter who just turned 7 years old.
But since I raised them alone almost all my life, for me my son was everything in this life.
And with the loss of him, I lost the meaning.
I can’t understand why God takes away children who had so many dreams and desires to live!?
It will be 6 months soon, and I cry every day and cannot find an answer: WHY!?
We all need strength and patience.
Why is something constantly pounding in my brain?
It shouldn't be like this! It's the children who have to bury their parents! How unfair!
There was no one and nothing left - just me and my pain!
I flinch at every sound, run to the door to open it for my son, but then the realization of reality comes, and I want to scream, tears roll down like hail, and then again the pain is so sharp and burning, and then there is emptiness.
God, how can this be? For what?
And so day after day, and there is no end to this pain!
Arina comments:
Why is God taking the children?...
Be strong and support those who are drowning in this grief.
I beg you, live, and forgive me for touching your misfortune with my awkward lines.
Julia comments:
Marina comments:
I just want to know one thing - will we meet there? And nothing more!
You know, I was also torn that I would never hear his voice and jokes again, or rejoice at his victories.
The Lord takes the best, and I always knew that death is not the end...
My son began to come to me in my dreams.
First, in the form of his human image, only consisting of smoke or fog, then he came, accompanied by someone who looked like a monk with a scythe, kissed me, as if saying goodbye, and went into a bright spot in a dark kingdom.
I then cried a lot and asked God not to erase his soul, to save it, and that no matter what form he was in, and no matter what world he found himself in, I would always love him and look forward to meeting him.
And today he came to my dream again - in the form of a warm, kind, green ball.
At first I didn’t understand that it was HIM, but by the end of the dream I felt it in my soul, in my heart (I can’t explain it in words), and I recognized HIM, and my soul brightened, and the joy appeared that HE was ALIVE.
I really love him in this form too.
Yes, I don’t care what he looks like, our LOVE IS ETERNAL!
I want to support everyone.
Try to communicate with them through meditation and internal concentration.
I did it and it made me feel better.
The main thing is that they are ALIVE, THEY are just different.
The Son himself told me this when he came to sleep. I told him: “Son, you’re dead!?”, and he said to me: “No, mom, I’M ALIVE, I’m just “DIFFERENT.”
I treat death as a long journey on which my son went, and on which I, too, when my time comes, will go, and we will definitely meet there.
And I'm sick!
It's almost a year since I buried my son.
Epilepsy attack - stroke - fracture of the base of the skull, 7 hours of surgery and three days of coma.
I already knew that he would not survive. She herself said: “Everything is Your Will, Lord!”
From infancy there was a fear that he would die, and I buried him in my sleep dozens of times.
Everyone said: “He will live a long time.” And he lived for 38 years.
He carried me in his arms and always pitied me.
One dream: to hug him and hear the usual words: “Don’t worry, mommy!”
What could happen to me now? I'm choking on tears.
I know that he has a good time there, and I will definitely see him.
Glory to God FOR EVERYTHING!
Everyone turned their backs on us.
Thanks to my son’s friends, they supported us as best they could.
I don’t know how I survived without going crazy.
This pain, melancholy, tears - they will never end.
Everything collapsed.
There is only one desire - to see my son, just to hug him.
Marina comments:
I believe that I am alive, but in another dimension.
But what kind of “hellish hell” is it to stay here without him...
I have been grieving for 5 years now.
In October 2011, my son, 22 years old, passed away.
And I want to tell you that this pain will never subside, and on the contrary, over time it only intensifies.
I fall asleep thinking about him, wake up, and all day I think about only one thing.
There are moments when I can be distracted for an hour or two, and then it’s like an electric shock.
I went to a psychologist, it didn’t help!
I haven’t communicated with my friends since then, because there were rumors that I was crazy and I urgently needed to be taken to a mental hospital (they decided this because I was constantly crying).
The husband started drinking, and now there is nothing left of the happy family (of the past).
I realized how cruel and unfair the world is, because my son was killed by drunken scoundrels.
Together with heartache I was filled with anger and hatred. I don't show them, but they are there.
And also a feeling of guilt for not saving my son.
He felt that he would soon be gone, and he told me about it every day.
I was scared to listen to this, and I scolded him.
Now I understand that with these conversations he was asking for help.
I didn't help!
My heart is breaking with pain.
Finally, I would like to say: “People, love and take care of each other, especially parents of children. There is no worse grief than the loss of a child, after which life is divided into before and after.”
Afterwards it is no longer life, but suffering.
Vita comments:
Valentina Romanovna, 53 years old, I was just looking for that person who experienced grief, as I am experiencing now - Vita Nikolaevna, 49 years old.
Good afternoon.
I read your lines and see my own similar grief there.
Just like yours, my only son, 21 years old, died at work.
My husband and I have been together for 8 months now.
I want to find a person and communicate, mutually helping to survive, giving will and patience.
If you don't mind, we could chat.
Goodbye.
Your love and pride for your child, his love for you and his family is a great happiness.
It will be painful and difficult, but try not to upset your children.
Write, help others, don’t close your soul.
This happened to us, it was impossible to change anything - such a deadline.
I'm one of you.
5 years ago my son died. He was 23 years old.
They should be proud of us.
Get up and say thank you to them that we have them.
Children see you, live and surprise them.
We are strong!
He worked as a truck driver, went home for a day and died.
I wasn't at home.
Maybe he could have been saved: they said he had a cerebral hemorrhage and cardiac arrest.
I can't live without him.
Why did this happen?
He was so strong, all his organs were healthy.
Well, how could he die?!
On September 26, 2016, my son Artyom’s heart stopped beating, but the worst thing was that we found out about this 11 days later - and all this time he was lying in the morgue, useless to anyone... he was 28.
None of the hospital workers, while he was alive, or the morgue staff, when his son was already dead, even thought of finding his relatives - he had a passport with him.
He was beaten, brutally, on the head... on his way to work for his shift.
And he was lying on a cold iron shelf in the morgue...
I don’t know why I should live, for what – he is my only child, everything was for him, his future family, grandchildren...
Some scum drug addicts deprived me of everything.
Despair, anger at people, pain - these are the feelings that remain.
What should I do?
As I understand you.
I do not live, but exist.
Because I don’t believe that he is no more.
The door will open and my son will come in.
I AM ALONE.
I keep thinking: when will I come to him?
It's very hard to live...
She hugged him, lying in a pool of blood, already lifeless, and even this was a consolation - to caress him, to support him.
He himself did not expect this. Wasn't going to die. He and I were very close. I was proud of him.
I always believed that there is no death with the Lord. And now I don’t feel anything at all and I don’t understand...
And of course, no one cares about our lives, people cannot even imagine such horror that we are experiencing, and instinctively move away.
This is our personal maternal grief, our heaviest cross.
Perhaps we will become cleaner, kinder.
After all, nothing will console you except the hope of meeting THERE...
Is it true what they say that when you cry often, you drown it there with your tears?
I cry every day. I don't sleep well at night.
I keep thinking, how is he there alone?
After all, my son was only 19 years old. So young and beautiful.
And even now I will never have grandchildren like him.
And I'm so lonely. There is no one to talk to about this.
Only the photographs remain.
And I really want to hug and kiss my own child.
Where can I find solace?
Dear mothers, reading your bitter, incredibly bitter stories, I cannot stop crying.
Your every sigh, every phrase resonates in your heart.
Only after losing your only son, your only hope, can you understand all the horror, all the nightmare going on in the soul of an orphaned mother.
On May 28, 2015, my capable, smart, beloved, educated, wonderful son died. My pride, my life, my breath. Now he's gone.
Back on April 4, he came to visit us - a handsome, strong, remarkably built, energetic man.
And on April 12, on Easter, his back began to hurt; on the 13th he was hospitalized at the Botkin Hospital with very poor blood counts: low hemoglobin and platelets.
They took a spinal cord puncture, did an MRI and made a diagnosis: stage 4 stomach cancer with metastases in the spinal cord, bones, lymph nodes...
And after a month and a half, my child was gone, every hour my boy became weaker and weaker, the damned disease simply sucked all the strength out of him, and he died in my arms.
Questions about why, why, how and why to live now drill into the brain from morning to evening and from night to morning. The meaning of life has disappeared.
Such melancholy, such darkness all around, and nothing to cling to.
My son was buried on Trinity Sunday.
In seven monasteries and in many churches Sorokoust read about his health. We prayed, asked, hoped...
A year and seven and a half months have passed since my boy passed away.
The tears don't stop, the pain doesn't subside. My husband and I are alone. Everyone moved away from us. It’s as if they are afraid of being infected with grief. We are outcasts.
I go to the Temple on Saturdays, and there I just cry.
This is how my child wanted to live. He helped people a lot. Why is he doing this!?
No answer...
They take the best, the brightest. BUT WHY???
There is NO strength to live in this terrible looking glass.
Dear mothers, I read and feel your pain with every cell, my soul, like an exposed nerve.
There is nothing more painful than losing a beloved child.
They say that time heals. IT'S NOT TRUE, time passes, but inside everything bleeds and hurts, and the main thing is that nothing can be changed, and this makes it even more painful.
Yesterday it was a year and a half since the death of my son Kirill, but everything seems to have just happened, and when I come to the grave, I don’t understand that my son is “there”, and I wait and wait for him.
Kirill, healthy and strong, left home in a car on his day off, and never returned to me.
He passed away two weeks after his thirty-fifth birthday.
I searched for him for 9 days, put up leaflets, put an ad on local television, called all authorities in the region.
And all this time Kiryusha was lying in the morgue of the neighboring region, and no one told us, but he was found in his car and with all the documents.
He was buried only on the thirteenth day, and all this was due to the negligence of the police.
And how scary it was to see my beloved son at the identification parade in the morgue: he lay so cold and helpless, sewn up with these terrible threads.
Can something like this be forgotten? Can time heal something like this?
Dear mothers, I wish you only strength to bear the grief that has fallen on our shoulders.
The Kingdom of Heaven for our children.
Valentina Romanovna, I agree with you, because I still don’t know how to survive the death of my beloved son.
When they bury small child, this is one thing, but when a 20-30 year old leaves us...
This can really blow your mind.
It’s as if he never lived at all...
There is nothing left...only a monument and memory...
I keep wondering why the Bible doesn’t write about how a mother should live?
How did Mary live after the crucifixion of her son Jesus? She found strength in herself.
And I'm in complete despair.
How familiar is this GRIEF to me, dear mothers.
And there are no words of consolation!
Living without your BELOVED child is unbearably painful.
And sometimes it seems like I've gone crazy.
My son was 29 years old.
2 years and 10 months have passed, and the wound is getting deeper.
I didn’t go for two years, but ran to the cemetery and to the place of death in the hope of seeing him.
And only recently I began to understand what really happened - and I don’t want to live.
The world has become different without him... the sun shines differently... and it’s like she’s in another dimension.
Only tears, tears...
THE MEANING OF LIFE IS LOST.
Before my eyes only his mutilated body and emptiness...
And my DIMULYa was smart, affectionate, loved skiing since childhood. In general, an accomplished person.
I just wish I could live and be happy, but...
Try to fold your infant and an adult - put it in your closed hands, maybe it will be a little easier.
It helped me.
Talk to them, ask for advice, make them happy with your mood.
They are nearby and see us!
This is just life, my dear moms and dads.
My son died at 23...
How and who admits that travel, healthy, athletic, with higher education a guy who loved life and people suddenly died at work?
Why does a mother need such a cross?
For raising a good man?
He was only 25 years old, and his wedding was planned in 11 days.
The bride cries every day.
How to live now and why?
I read the comments of women-mothers, and my very soul is torn to pieces.
Why didn’t God give him a chance, took him away, as if he had picked a flower?
There were no signs of terrible grief.
How to live?
A 34-year-old son died of cardiomyopathy.
Didn’t complain about anything, where did this come from, why?
Write, maybe someone has had such grief?
My son passed away 2.5 years ago.
I had a stroke, recovered well, then my husband died, things started getting worse, and then he had a brain hemorrhage, and that’s all...
In 10 months I lost my most beloved men.
I still can’t come to my senses: it’s not true—time doesn’t heal.
It’s especially hard on holidays and family dates.
We were very happy family: loving attentive son, smart and handsome.
There were no risk factors for stroke, except perhaps the pace of life, but whoever has it now is calm.
I cry every day, I communicate less with my friends, I think that they cannot understand me.
We raised our children together, and their problems seem so trivial to me.
I don’t understand what LET GO means?
Is it to forget and not remember?
I have a wonderful daughter and a beautiful granddaughter, I am constantly afraid for them!
But even their love and care does not help calm down!
The place in the heart that my son occupied and still occupies cannot be taken by anyone or anything!
Constantly thinking about WHAT and WHY!
In the morning, hysterics with sobs, then pills.
I try not to tell my daughter everything, she is very worried about me.
All sorts of thoughts come into my head, it’s very painful to live, and only thoughts about her stop me.
But it hurts a lot!
I constantly think that I didn’t do everything, I didn’t tell him everything about how much I love him, although he always knew it.
The feeling of guilt that he is gone and I live constantly squeezes my heart...
Eight months ago, after a serious illness - a brain tumor - my son died. He was 36 years old.
At first, apart from unaccountable horror, I felt and did not understand anything.
Then thoughts began to break through his consciousness: that nothing could be returned back, that nothing could be changed, that he would never live again.
And it became even worse from this hopelessness.
I live - I eat, I work, I perform some actions like a robot, but nothing reaches my consciousness.
As a person, I simply don’t exist – it’s not me.
I can’t think of anything - except: did I do everything to cure him?
Helplessness in the face of this disease simply completely deprives me of strength.
We trusted each other very much, and until the last I tried to believe myself and instill in him hope that we could cope with it.
But... life...
I know he was scared because he was trying to find out: is there something beyond the boundaries of existence?
How is he doing now?
What can be done to make him feel good there if he cannot be returned?
Thank you, Tatyana.
Your words made me feel a little better.
My son, 22 years old, just recently died.
It's not even 40 days yet.
I think I'm going crazy.
I feel him very much - on the day of his death I suddenly felt a strong joy, such a boyish one, and relief, as if he had lifted a huge load from his shoulders, not for long, I felt it for a minute or two, for 3 days he was still the same as before, he was happy when I I thought about him in meditation, and our souls met.
9 days - already different - he rethought a lot of things, then after 3 weeks his soul came to me in a dream, already without personality - just a luminous outline of a person, even without gender.
I know that on the 40th day the soul leaves completely for other worlds, I’ll probably stop feeling it like that.
Yesterday I watched the film “Our Hearth”, I felt better for a while.
I do spiritual practices, I really feel people, and I really feel my son.
I know that there is no death, there is only the death of the body, that the soul is eternal, but the mind still refuses to understand this.
Dear girls, how did you stand it, without knowledge, without techniques, without the ability to restore and put yourself in order?
Be strong, don’t close yourself off, don’t become embittered, find the strength within yourself to love and have compassion for people, help and love your loved ones and more - this will be your salvation.
It was as if something had opened up in me, very strong compassion, caring.
What previously didn’t touch me at all now causes a bunch of different experiences.
Nothing just happens, everything has God’s great plan, everything is His will.
There are many things we cannot understand at our stage of development.
You just need to accept it as it is.
Find in yourself faith, love, gratitude and humility before His will.
To believe that everything happens out of love for us and our children.
Today I was in church - the Virgin Mary also went through this - the death of her son.
No one is immune from this; on the contrary, it is the lot of the strong.
On the 9th, after lunch, he felt bad, I called an ambulance.
They asked about his details, and when I said that the policy was left at home in Baymak, they replied that he should apply at his place of residence.
In the evening, the condition worsened, blood pressure and shortness of breath rose.
I called an ambulance again, a paramedic arrived, I told him that he had suffered a heart attack on his legs, had pneumonia, he measured his blood pressure, gave him an injection for blood pressure, told him to go to an appointment tomorrow, for some reason, to see a surgeon and, citing the lack of insurance, left him at home.
After that, the son fell asleep.
But early in the morning he became very ill, with severe shortness of breath.
I called an ambulance again, the team arrived in 25 minutes.
But it was too late, he died in my arms.
He was only 44 years old.
The doctor himself.
All his life he worked as a massage therapist, raised seriously ill people to their feet, and was a kind and sympathetic person.
He built a two-story house and did everything in it with his own hands.
Today I was in the hospital in Baymak.
And there I found out that on March 6 he had a fluorography, where he was diagnosed with double pneumonia.
The attending physician (last name hidden by the administration) prescribed only outpatient treatment.
He went to see her in March, April, and May.
I lost 21 kg: I weighed 83, now I weigh 62.
On May 26, a doctor was called to his house, he felt bad, but she again prescribed only medications and left.
Today I met with her, and she began to prove that he was cured.
And this is said by a doctor with almost 40 years of experience, who headed for many years VTEK.
Why then did he die of pneumonia?
Soon it will be three months since my son died, but I cannot forget him for a minute, everything is before my eyes.
Why are people who should care about people's health so callous, inconsiderate and soulless?
This question does not leave me, how guilty I am before you, my boy, son.
I’m sorry that I wasn’t there, I’m sorry that I didn’t hear you right away, I’m sorry that I was busy at times, I’m sorry a hundred thousand times.
I am 41 years old, and I have an only son, he was 19 years old, smart, very handsome, but had health problems.
They were observed while still at the institute, and everything was stable: he grew up, lived, studied, entered medical school.
But another disease appeared. Diabetes mellitus.
There was no way to muffle it, constant jumps, but this is not a reason for death!
In July '17 I went to Krasnodar region All my relatives came to my grandmother: my brothers, wives, children.
We planned to arrive a little later - by the end of August - by the beginning of September, but my son did not wait and went alone.
It was unbearably hot, but during the day he did not go outside, but sat at home under the air conditioner.
On July 18, my brother and nephew went skating on the courts, in the evening we went to a cafe, came home happy, happy, but on the morning of July 19, my son’s legs hurt, it happened to him that he was lying on the sofa.
In the evening, my dear only child called me and asked how things were.
I was at work.
He said that he had measured his sugar, everything was normal, but his legs hurt, it was hard to stand up, and that I should come quickly...
I can’t write, I’m shedding tears...
To which I replied that I would call him back after work.
But in the evening my brother called me and said: leave urgently.
I started getting hysterical, my husband and I left immediately from Ulyanovsk, I didn’t believe it, and I don’t believe it now.
08/19/17 my son left our lives, a paramedic arrived, and he couldn’t even give an injection or measure his sugar.
From helplessness on his part, the son began to panic and suffocate.
There was no stretcher message at the hospital, the doctor started calling the intensive care unit, and my son was leaving, 30 minutes later she arrived, but it was too late, time was lost, my son left, conscious and in memory, sudden cardiac death, that’s what they wrote .
But how could I, the mother, not feel the trouble, didn’t say how much I love him, wasn’t there, I can’t forgive myself for this, everything would have been different, my whole life revolved around him, but now everything has broken down and lost its meaning.
My mother and I are left alone, we cannot talk about our beloved son, our beloved grandson, how painful, unbearably my heart is tearing into pieces.
For us he is alive, and he just came out...
Elena comments:
Good day, I no longer have the strength to hold this unbearable pain within myself, I can’t comprehend, my brain refuses to believe that this happened, the most terrible grief has crossed the threshold of our cheerful and friendly family: for what, and why so early?!
Hello Elena!
My name is Sveta, I'm 42 years old.
He was everything to me after the birth of our first stillborn daughter.
A month before turning 19, my son had his first seizure.
My husband and I couldn’t believe it: how could a normal, healthy young man suddenly get sick?
Then there were two more attacks, we went to the doctor in the morning, he prescribed pills, I went to work, and my husband went to the pharmacy.
The son fell at home and died.
Life has become empty, so we think about the child.
Maybe all is not lost and the meaning of life will appear?
I have three sons, smart, decent guys, my husband and I were jealous of the kind of sons we raised.
My middle son Anatoly died in an accident; he was a driver and fell asleep at the wheel.
The son was 40 years old.
Left behind are grandchildren, a good, beautiful and smart wife...
Hello.
There is no way to survive this.
17 years old. How so?
I was returning home from school. “Electric arc” was walking and just fell.
Friends called and said that he didn’t seem to be breathing.
I'm still going crazy.
The ambulance took an hour.
I think he died in my dad’s arms.
They tried to hold him.
I breathed for him, dad massaged his heart, but alas.
There are also 2 brothers and a sister left.
I pray for him.
I cry day and night, they say I can’t...
How many of us are such mothers, waiting to die and meet our sons?
But time does not heal, on the contrary, it becomes more painful...
I cried while I read it.
How I feel sorry for the mothers who lost their children.
My beloved son died at work at the age of 23, it will soon be seven years since he has been with me, and I still don’t believe it and can’t come to terms with it.
My relatives turned away, and my acquaintances shied away from me like I was a leper.
I live with this unbearable pain, nothing makes me happy, but what should I do? I thought that I wouldn’t last long, but now it’s been December 28th for seven years.
I sympathize and condole with all mothers, peace in your soul!
Elena comments:
But how could I, the mother, not feel the trouble, didn’t say how much I love him, wasn’t there, I can’t forgive myself for this, everything would have been different, my whole life revolved around him, and now everything has ended...
So I, mother, didn’t even feel that my son was dead, even my heart didn’t predict anything! How so?
Why do they say that a mother’s heart feels trouble, but why was mine silent?
And now he’s tearing himself apart and how I regret that I probably didn’t tell him enough that I love him, he’s my son!
Forgive me son, forgive me...
At 7 months, hepatitis B was introduced along with the vaccination.
How much we suffered with him is beyond words.
We were in 6 hospitals.
At the age of 5, our enzymes returned to normal and we were taken off the register.
All this time, he and I followed diets. Everything was fine.
At the age of 18 he got married and had a child.
But at some point I missed it.
Problems arose with work, he began to drink and, naturally, his liver could not stand it.
For the last three days he hasn't been himself.
He said that his stomach hurt and he had diarrhea.
He never complained of pain, and then he didn’t tell me that he was vomiting and loose stools with blood.
He was taken away by ambulance with low blood pressure.
I didn't see him again.
From big loss blood, he went into shock.
He was given a sleeping injection, and his son never woke up.
I have three children, he is the oldest.
Kind, sympathetic, always helped us and was always there.
I still can't believe he's gone.
My health has deteriorated greatly.
I go to doctors, but I think it’s because I miss my son.
On the morning of March 9, they drank tea with sweets given to them for the holiday, and in the evening Zhenya was taken by ambulance to in serious condition, and after another 2 weeks he was gone, his kidneys, lungs, and heart failed.
Even in intensive care, while he could still speak, he was always eager to go home, he did not even admit the thought that he was dying.
I have no one else, no one at all, alone in a strange city - we moved 8 years ago, but there have always been only two of us, the rest are strangers.
There are 4 cats and a dog left, they are the only ones they keep, and there is only one desire - to get to Zhenya as soon as possible, I even prepared a place for myself next to him.
I don’t believe in God anymore, I don’t want to believe in a God who takes away a mother’s only child.
But I still pray for my son as best I can, maybe he will feel better from my prayer.
Once in a dream, or maybe not in a dream, Zhenyushka asked me to let him go, I try, but it doesn’t work out well, i.e. It doesn't work out at all.
And also a huge, terrible feeling of guilt: I didn’t save him, only me.
He was so wonderful, smart, handsome, he did so much for me, but I didn’t save him.
My hell has already arrived, I probably deserve it.
If only my boy felt good there, or at least wasn’t in pain anymore.
I love you so much.
Once upon a time, in 2001, I buried both of my parents within a month, it was a nightmare, but now it’s completely different, there are no words to describe all the horror that’s happening to me: feelings of guilt, unbearable melancholy, fear, hopelessness, emptiness, grief and despair.
The only thing that saves me is work, there are moments when I feel like before, but it passes quickly, tears every day, but no one sees them.
My son told me before that I’m strong, but I’m not like that, life just puts me in such circumstances that there’s nowhere to go, I have to climb further, which is what I’m trying to do now.
I just want him to feel good now, I don’t expect anything else.
I’m 43 years old, I’m no longer afraid of dying, but I also have a 9-year-old son, so we’ll move on.
I wish you all, mommies, good health, comfort, strength and patience.
And our children are now with us forever, and always young.
My mother-in-law’s eldest son died two days ago, I am the wife of the youngest.
I want to help her, but I don't know how.
Tell me how to survive such grief?
Greetings, Irina.
I sincerely sympathize with you.
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1.5 years have passed since my son passed away.
But the pain is still the same - time does not heal.
It may heal, but they just don’t live that long.
I have no holidays now!
The pre-New Year bustle - people are all running somewhere, buying something, bringing Christmas trees, gifts, but for me everything is in a fog.
I look at them as if they were savages and walk around as if they were detached.
In every young guy I see my son, I want to call out to him, and then reality comes - a terrible, vile, unfair reality! I cry often.
My friends have all moved away - no one is interested in communicating with me now - I am always sad, never laughing.
People, can you imagine, I forgot how to laugh!
Nothing makes me happy in this life - I am alone, always alone with my grief.
The day has passed - and okay. And so it always is...
Fourth New Year without son.
Holidays don't exist for me anymore.
Dimochka would have been 33 years old, but he was crushed by a freight train.
Handsome, smart, beloved son.
Over the years there was everything: disbelief, denial of what happened and thoughts of suicide: just to see him faster.
I constantly went to the Church, to the cemetery and to the place of death in the hope of seeing him (maybe a silhouette would flash somewhere) - and it was easier for me because I was really looking for him for three years, and this forced myself to live.
In passers-by, everywhere, and suddenly I realized that I was slowly going crazy.
And at that moment everything broke off.
Now I am stuck in a state that is incomprehensible to me: I am between heaven and earth.
I am completely empty, I don’t want anything, it seems like life goes on, but I am NOT in it!
3 months have passed since my beloved son has passed away.
He passed away on September 30, 2017.
He turned 27 years old on June 2.
Heart failure.
This happened in another city, and we were told about the whole horror on September 31st by phone.
God! For what and why?
He went to enroll in St. Petersburg, his favorite city. We ourselves are from Estonia – Tallinn.
He kept telling me: “Mommy, what could happen to me here? I'm in the middle beautiful city peace. Everything will be fine!".
And this is true - the pain does not go away, and time, and the Church, and prayers do not help this grief subside.
I’m not alone - I also have a daughter, and she just turned 10 years old.
I understand that I need to live for my daughter and find the strength to make her life happy.
But so far it’s not working out very well - she often sees me cry.
I communicate with my son’s friends, and this gives me a little strength - that they remember him as smart, kind, and cheerful.
He wrote poetry and essays, and was a very talented and caring son and brother.
To everyone who has lost their children - just live!
And for the sake of the memory of our children, we must live confidently, and find the strength not to isolate ourselves in our grief.
Good evening, dear girls.
I hate this day, this number.
In the tear-off calendar, right at the beginning of the year, I tear off a piece of paper with this number.
It doesn't get any easier.
It’s like they tied a weight on your heart and said: drag it! And you drag it. And you are silent.
No one is interested in your pain, your tears, your torment.
This can only be understood by those who have experienced it.
I don’t go to Church, auto training doesn’t help anymore.
She became an angry, grumpy aunt.
And you know, I stopped being afraid of something.
I say what I think, I tell the truth, I go ahead, so I stopped communicating with my relatives, who, instead of supporting me after the funeral, came to me to borrow money for their urgent matters.
That’s when I realized that I would not reveal my soul to anyone, show my tears and experiences.
Now I don't care about anything: neither crises, nor bad weather, no gossip at work, nothing.
After all lived before and I was afraid: maybe they’ll fire me from my job, maybe my boss will yell at me, maybe people will think something wrong.
But they should be afraid of this kind of ending. Once and done!
Open the gate - the death of a loved one has come and become the mistress of your home.
She is everywhere: in your head, in your bed.
He sits down at the table with you every day.
And every day you show her nothing - with anger, with hatred.
And you live and walk not with your head down and teary eyes, but looking directly into the eyes of people who are just waiting for you to become limp, to become pathetic and unhappy.
No, girls!
We must live and remember our boys!
After all, they only have us, and we only have them.
Hang in there.
I went to the billiard room with friends.
They parted at 20.00, and at 00.15 he was found on the railway platform.
He took his own life.
I don't believe that my son can do this.
In September he himself entered the institute. Worked.
We live in Moscow.
How did this happen, and what was he doing there?
I go to Church, it helps me a lot.
I pray morning and evening.
We all need strength and patience.
God does not give trials that a person cannot survive.
Dear friends, out of great grief, I wrote earlier about my terrible loss of my only son.
And I often return to this section.
The feelings and thoughts of most of you, girls, are very close, but I cannot agree with Olga that God does not give a person more trials than he can withstand.
There are a lot of examples of unfortunate mothers leaving after their children.
I’ll say about myself: I became a different person, not a trace remained of the kind-hearted woman.
There is no pity or compassion in the soul, only ashes.
The world is dressed in black and gray tones.
Like Oksana, I became angry and unpleasant.
Me, my soul, was burned, destroyed by the merciless death of my only son.
Saint Ignatius Brianchaninov wrote that death is an execution.
Only they executed not only my son, but also me.
Sorry if I wrote something wrong.
It's very hard...
I also buried my son.
Some scum killed him at work during his shift.
There was no investigation, they paid off.
Now the only thing that matters is money.
They brought him in a zinc coffin.
For some reason I didn’t even cry for a month. But now I cry several times a day.
I’m waiting for my son to come home, I can’t believe he’s gone.
She lost her parents at the age of 7 and was raised in an orphanage.
I don't go to Church.
Where is God, why is he so unjust?
They steal by the billions, they kill people, and these scum go berserk because of fat and mock the people, but God does not punish them.
Tomorrow it’s nine months since I buried my beloved son.
Death snatched it from my hands.
I am alive, so to speak.
I don’t believe that he is no more, that I will never see him, that I will never hear his affectionate “Mommy.”
And I wait, I wait...
I think about him every second. I remember.
He is like our sun, always with a smile.
And now everything has faded, darkness, an emptiness that cannot be filled.
I scream and howl every day. I can't cope.
How to live, why? Why is this so?
Nearby is the family of the eldest son.
They don't leave me, but that doesn't save me.
I buried my 17-year-old son in 2004, 8 months later my mother died, and another 8 months later my mother-in-law died.
My husband and I are still living in grief, it will never be easier.
Hello!
Suddenly, it seems absurd.
I live, I don’t know how.
Hold on, be strong, only time will help and everything will fall into place.
Save, Lord, parents and help them, who have lost the most precious thing - their children.
Three years have passed, it’s a little easier, but why does it hurt so much sometimes...
Hello!
In December 2017, I accompanied my son to the next competition in another city.
Three days after the game, we called each other, talked quickly, I was in a hurry and told him: “Let’s discuss everything in the evening?”...
30 minutes later he was gone.
14 years old, handsome, smart.
Two months passed in a state of delirium.
It doesn't get any easier.
Endless pain, despair.
I have youngest daughter, I’m trying to somehow pull myself together for her sake, but it’s not going well for me.
Through the prism of grief, everything seems different - friends, relationships, life itself.
Nice, kind people.
I was looking for help and came across your site.
He was 33 years old and was returning from his shift.
I talked to him for an hour 2 hours before departure.
What remains is my wife, two children and my pain.
She tears the heart, the soul.
I walk around like a zombie, I don’t understand anything.
9 years have passed and they haven’t buried us yet, we’re waiting, there’s no news from Moscow.
Father said that we must humbly accept the death of children, just as the Mother of God accepted the death of her son Jesus Christ.
I understand with my mind, but not with my heart - after all, my soul and my son left me.
I look at the photo and ask for one thing - to take me home.
Valechka, dear, I really want to say words of support to you, to relieve your pain at least a little.
But this is impossible.
I lost my only son 2 years and 9 months ago, and no one said anything to ease my pain one iota.
There was a son in my soul, and now there is pain.
Darling, dear sister, hold on.
It is unknown why such a fierce punishment is given.
And you have to live with it.
My infinitely dear, but invisible brothers and sisters.
I just read all the comments left by heartbroken people.
He hid his eyes so that no one could see the tears of a man who has no right to advise you anything.
My soul mourns next to you, carrying sadness and loss through my heart.
Please accept my sincere words of condolences and try to find strength for the sake of those who remained close. They need you.
Forgive me.
With a low bow, Dmitry Nikolaevich. And to be completely open, Dimka is from Moscow.
Thank you, Dmitry, for kind words support.
Dima, thank you for this site.
For your sympathy and compassion.
It's worth a lot.
Most people try to abstract themselves from the horror that befalls the unfortunate mothers.
Even seemingly close people move away, as if afraid of being “infected.”
And there is no support in the Temple: “God gave, God took.” How and what to live with?...
My deepest bow to you, Dima, for your participation.
Thank you, Dima, and my dear friends in misfortune.
Many people go, call, sympathize, and then everyone has their own life, worries and problems.
You are left alone, apart from those closest to you.
During the day at work, but when you come, you look at the photo and howl like a wolf.
No strength. It seems like you understand that you have to hold on, but you can’t.
My son died on February 28, 2017, right at work.
I already wrote here.
Child-Angel, an athlete with a higher education, beautiful in both soul and body.
God took him, simply tore him out of life.
A year has passed, has it gotten any easier? No.
Pain, resentment, a sense of injustice and indifference to previously life values.
Everything suddenly went dark.
On February 23, 2018, I lost the most dear person - my only son.
He was only 33 years old.
I can’t believe he’s gone, the pain of loss, the emptiness.
It seems that he is somewhere nearby, but does not let you approach him.
My hands are taken away, I can’t do anything.
He walked to our house that day, but never arrived.
After lunch we still talked with him, and at 14-30 he was no longer there.
I felt so bad at that moment, my heart obviously felt that something was wrong with it.
They started calling him on his phone, but he didn’t answer.
And in the morning we found out that he was no longer there.
He was kind, sympathetic, played sports, but an absurd death cut his life short.
It’s probably true what they say that God takes the best to himself, but why so early?
At first you don’t understand how you can go to work, watch TV, sleep, walk, etc., because he’s not there, he won’t come to you, he won’t call you.
All that remains are memories: you see him as a little teenager, then the army, and then it’s all over, in an instant.
This is unbearable!
It sits in your subcortex, and with this you continue on your way.
You know, before I always dreamed about different things, but now it’s like it’s cut off.
The day has passed, oh well.
People are fussing about something: cars, loans, apartments, new phones.
And you know that you don’t need any of this, you look at the photo and ask: well, say at least a word, at least once hear: Mom, it’s me.
It’s empty, girls’ souls, it’s empty.
Dear mothers, please accept my most sincere condolences.
Losing a child is beyond human strength!
Let our children have a good time on the clouds, and we will definitely meet them and hug them tightly.
On January 31, 2018, my son Roman passed away.
Today is the sixth month that he has been gone.
I really want to see him.
I cry every day.
I want to die to meet him.
I don't want to live.
My son is in my head all the time.
Every day the date approaches - six months.
I’m scared, it hurts to realize that my child has been gone for so long and that he will never come or call.
I saw information on the Internet that supposedly I feel sorry for myself when I cry and suffer for my son.
My good women, I read all your letters - I read them and cried quietly.
You saved me: for 2 weeks now I have had one thought - I don’t want to live.
My son, thank God, is alive, but is in pre-trial detention.
He is not a rapist or a murderer, he got there through his own stupidity, for which he will be held accountable.
For my husband and me, this news turned out to be the end of the world, but, thank God, friends and relatives were nearby - no one turned away.
You need to ask God for help and pray, he will definitely hear and help.
Thank you very much.
My son, he is 24 years old... He died, and I don’t know what to do next without him! My life was cut short. I don't want to live...
Dear Kotya's mother.
I am incredibly sorry for you, myself and all the bereaved mothers who wrote to this site.
My only son Sasha has been gone for three years and two months.
Three years of tears, despair, protest.
Here Natasha writes that we need to ask God for help, pray, and God will help. Didn't help me.
Good, poor Kotya’s mother, I know how hard and hopeless it is for you.
I would like to help in some way, to ease this universal pain. But I can only cry next to you...
Tell me God, why did you do this?
After all, I prayed and asked you: To preserve Him as you would yourself.
Did you take revenge because I loved my son more than I love you?!
What have you achieved with your cruelty?
It just proved that you don’t like people...
The soul screams, all the strings are torn in it: For what? For what?
After all, I needed him more.
I ask you a question.
I am Mother! And I have the right to know this!
Are you silent?!
Which means there is no answer...
Or don't you want to answer this?!
Hello moms!
I, like you, lost mine youngest son. He was 27 years old and died in a plane crash that occurred on March 6, 2018 in Syria, in the city of Khmeimim. He is a guard senior lieutenant.
I passed through more than one hot spot, but unfortunately, due to the pilot’s mistake, 39 families were orphaned.
I want to support YOU all in this huge grief, I, like you all, constantly cry.
There were a lot of plans and prospects, but alas, there is such a terrible word DESTINY.
I try to survive only with my mind, inner emptiness and indifference, I think we all experience this.
But there is one BUT that gives me a chance to survive. My son would be against me suffering like this. He came to me on the third day after death and showed me how they died, this question tormented me very much.
He comes very rarely, but he shows that everything is fine with him. And I have no right to let him down.
We must let our boys go to heaven, otherwise we are simply preventing them from finding peace with our tears and thoughts.
We act like selfish people who feel bad and sad, forgetting that this only brings pain to our boys, and while protecting us, they cannot go to heaven until the end.
We have a very strong connection with the boys.
I always felt this very strongly, and my son was always surprised that I called him in difficult moments.
I decided for myself that I love my son VERY much, and therefore I have no right to disappoint him.
I once asked him at a grave whether he could see and hear me, and at some point I saw a thin cobweb on my finger that went into the sky.
I was very happy, thanked my cub, and promised that I would try very hard not to bother him.
So I’m surviving little by little. And I ask YOU all, let your sons go little by little.
We cannot correct the situation, but we can create peace for them.
We love them and for the sake of our sons, we must do this.
If fate has decided so, then we still have to finish something in this world.
And our boys are always with us, and protect us foolish ones. Hang in there, girls, only we can help ourselves.
Lyuba, thank you. Your message helped me think...
Poor, unhappy mothers.
No matter how old a child is, he will remain a child for parents, especially mothers.
Such grief destroys, rather than cleanses, a person’s soul.
The soul is empty and life seems empty. I'm one of you too.
You can’t live, you can’t die either, there’s nowhere to put a comma...
Awakening begins with the words: me and now. Over the past eight months, waking up has become incredibly painful, the cold consciousness that I’m still here does not come right away... I always used to love waking up, I jumped out of bed in the morning with a smile, so happy, which my boys never understood... They probably thought, that only people who do not understand one thing can rejoice at a new day simple thing– now is not just a moment, it’s a reminder that yesterday’s happy day has moved away by a day, the last happy year has moved away by a year, and sooner or later She will come..., they say, what’s the hurry... I smiled and kissed them on the cheeks...))
Now, to get up in the morning, it takes time, I need to remember who I was before, what I looked like, how I should behave... Having gotten dressed and putting the final “gloss” on my stiff and quite tolerable appearance, I remember what role I have ahead of me. What I see in the mirror is not a reflection at all, but rather a silent request: JUST STAY TILL THE EVENING.
Maybe this is too much, but on the other hand, my heart is broken just like all the mothers here, I feel like I’m going to the bottom, drowning, can’t breathe... There was at least some meaning in my life when you felt that there really was someone next to you, a soul who understands you all, whom you love endlessly. to my only son was 20 years old. On December 22, 2017, he passed away. Egor died tragically......
They say the older you are, the more experience you have. Complete bullshit! Now I understand that over the years I have become much stupider. After all, experience is not what happens to a person, but what a person does with what happens.
... For the first time in my life I don’t know what awaits me, every day is like a fog. Nothing will change anymore...
06/08/2018 at 15.40 a car hit my daughter. She was 16 years old. 10 minutes before, I spoke to her on the phone. She came to my work to see a doctor. I work in a clinic. She came and was so sad. It also began to rain and wet us while I was seeing her off.
I stood there, looking after her, as if I felt that I wouldn’t see her again. And I didn’t see it.
And then the nightmare of this day began. I couldn't get through on the phone. I thought why I didn’t get home. She was hit by a car near her house. At the bus stop.
While I was driving, while the ambulance was taking her, she died on the way. I arrived at the morgue. I didn’t believe it until the very end.
And then I saw that she was lying covered in blood - all from head to toe. My girl. And there I died with her. So I don’t know how I live. I seem to be breathing, but I don’t seem to be breathing. Don't know. I feel like I'm behind glass. Like an alien.
I have had this feeling of “life behind glass” for four years now. People live there, rejoice, fuss with their worries, funny problems... All acquaintances, friends, and even the Church are there... And here I am alone, and sadness, and tears, and resentment, and hopelessness... I have no strength...
On August 05, 2018, my beloved, my only natural son, tragically passed away. He was only 21 years old. The feeling of guilt that I am alive, but he is not, does not leave me for a minute.
Every day I go to the cemetery. One day it’s just hysterical, the next day there are not even tears, just emptiness. You go crazy from hopelessness.
At the end of June they killed my 22nd - year old son, in the evening he drove his car to his friends’ dacha, but didn’t get there - he was brutally shot at point-blank range by unknown people, and the car was put up for sale.
My husband and brother found our boy’s body themselves (using the track from the car tracker that was on my phone). The investigation is ongoing, there are no results yet.
My husband and I were left alone, our son was late, the only one.
The son was very bright, kind, smart, graduated from college brilliantly, served in the army (as a military driver), worked for 11 months in an auto parts store as a cashier-consultant - he managed almost everything in his short life, met a girl, he had so many plans.
We are 52 and 61. That's it. Dot. The meaning of life has disappeared. We are looking forward to meeting our son. I go to the Temple, try to pray, confess, take communion, but somehow everything is mechanical, not like before (when I was expecting my son from the army).
My son, aged 38, passed away on July 10, 2018. Heart failure, 2 resuscitation teams could not save him. There were no signs of trouble. The ambulance station told me that there are about 200 thousand such cases in Russia every year. A year ago I was in Jerusalem, asking God for health for him...
Now I live in another dimension - I remember it every minute.
2 years ago, on October 30, our only and best passed away. I will never accept this. The pain killed everything alive inside, and this cannot be explained to anyone. Only those who have experienced it will understand. All relatives and friends disappeared. The world is cruel and unprincipled.
I don’t believe in God after the tragedy: my husband and I have aged and generally changed. We sincerely forgot how to rejoice and laugh - there is no happiness without our son. I have had thoughts of suicide many times, but I understand that this is not a solution. I work, go dancing, it’s distracting, but this is temporary self-deception.
There is no full life without my beloved and dear son, and there is no life. Everything around seems artificial. Things that used to make you happy have lost their value. There is no value in anything, I only regret my mother.
When I was 13 years old, my sister died tragically in 2000, she was 17 years old, and now we have the same story.
It's very difficult. Psychics and fortune tellers only profit from grief. They have no humanity, they are only interested in money. I don’t even know who to contact anymore. We live somehow.
After the first year I wanted to divorce my husband, but he had no one but me, then I realized that I couldn’t do that. It's like betraying my son.
We fought and blamed each other. Then we realized that it was all pointless.
The psychotherapist could not help us.
Sometimes I write poems and dedicate them to my son. In those moments I feel better, as if I was talking to him. After he left, I wrote 6 long and serious poems. It seems to me that he himself seemed to dictate to me what to write. I started writing the book “On the Edge, the Silent World.” It is still under development. I write about experiences and silent grief.
I read all the comments and started crying. It turns out I'm not the only one! 2 months ago my son died. He was 2 weeks shy of turning 22. We were planning a wedding in the summer. He didn’t even have time to have grandchildren. Such emptiness inside. Emptiness and PAIN! I don’t know how to live further. I no longer have the strength to cry and suffer. Keeps you afloat eldest daughter with grandchildren, but they are far away. We communicate by phone. Indeed, I don’t want to do anything, there’s only one thought in my head: why, for what? Who needs this? The church is not helping, it is getting worse. It seems that if I had gone to Church earlier, I would have saved her and prayed for her. The feeling of guilt eats away. I'm afraid I can't stand it! How not to do something irreparable? My husband also cries all day long. He was the only one he had. So many hopes were pinned on him! Also, almost all relatives and friends refused. Who needs someone else's grief? No one calls except my daughter.
Valechka, dear, I used to go to Church, pray to the Lord, especially to the Mother of God for my son... Nothing helped, no one protected me from a severe illness. And now it only makes me feel worse...
I don't want anything more in this terrible life. She buried her son in 2018 on January 31st. I think about him constantly. There wasn't a single day, not a single minute that I didn't think about him. I want to see him and miss him very much. Where is my son? Lord, where is my child? It's unbearable.
On June 17, my son died. He was my only child and close person. I will punish myself for not being able to help and protect him. He doesn't even come to me in my dreams. How can I make him feel calm and happy there? Should I continue to live? I'm all alone. Can I correspond with any of the survivors of this tragedy? It's very difficult for me.
Irina, hello. I am your namesake and the grief of losing my only son four years ago fell upon me...
On July 19, my son, my beloved son, died, this pain cannot be survived, should I start smoking, I once smoked, or maybe drink? He was 43 years old and was hit by a boat propeller in the water. I just can’t get over it, my heart is constantly aching, I don’t want to believe in this whole nightmare. People, help!!!
My little Angel was 14 years old, we fought for two years with a disease called Sarcoma. Stage 4. On 08/04/2019 he left and left me alone. The soul is torn to pieces, it really hurts a lot. We must continue to live in memory of him.
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