What is sentimentality? Is it harmful? A sentimental person, how to get rid of excessive sentimentality.

Sentimentality is a person’s manifestation of excessively strong emotions where they are inappropriate. Empathy, admiration, tenderness, grief - these are just some of the quite common experiences for a sentimental person. However, all this appears in an exaggerated, inappropriate form, which makes such people weak or unrestrained in the eyes of others.

Manifestations of sentimentality

The desire to find out is understandable, given how often this word is used in literature and cinema. Sentimentality can manifest itself in different ways, depending on the person. Some are prone to excessive empathy, constantly putting themselves in the place of some kind of victim. For example, while watching a sad, dramatic film, a sentimental person may burst into tears at a particularly emotional moment. This kind of display of affection may be cute if performed by a woman, but a man's reputation can be seriously damaged after such an incident.

A sad book or a soulful song can also touch a sentimental person. Naturally, excessive sentimentality concerns not only negative emotions. Admiration or tenderness can also overflow, even if others see no reason for this. Therefore, excessive sentimentality can become a problem if it is not brought under control.

Control over emotions

It would seem that since sentimentality brings so many troubles, it would be better to keep a tight rein on yourself and restrain the flow of inadequate emotions. But this approach only seems correct at first, because constant suppression of strong emotional impulses can lead to disaster. The repressed material will be deposited in the depths of the subconscious, so that one day it will break out from there in a terrifying torrent. To avoid having to resort to the services of a psychotherapist later, you need to act gently, trying to better understand your own emotions and understand the reason for such intense experiences.

You should allow your emotions to come out, just do it alone, then over time you will be able to take control of your sentimentality without suppressing or torturing yourself.

Sentimentality in women

Women are affected by emotions much more than men. When thinking about what sentimentality is, images of sensual, unbalanced ladies come to mind, whose lives are subordinated to feelings, and not to the voice of reason. Such women are able to loudly admire every little thing, keep memorabilia for years, reverently remembering the past days.

A small child, kitten, puppy or other cute things evoke such strong affection in sentimental women that it can simply shock others.

Over time, sentimentality has become firmly associated with the standard image of a woman, but this is just a stereotype, because not all of them are overly sensitive. However, usually the older a woman is, the more sentimental she is. Everyone has come across compassionate aunties, ready to faint at the first opportunity or melt into emotion as soon as they see a child.

Sentimentality in men

If a sentimental woman is a fairly common phenomenon that does not cause disgust or hostility in most people, then a man showing extreme sensitivity is a completely different matter. To understand what sentimentality is for a man, just imagine a grown man crying over a melodrama or squealing with delight in the middle of the street. A man who is too sensual looks ridiculous, it is difficult to gain respect for him, because a stereotypical male representative should be a strong and stern titan, and not a wimp who pities all living things around him.

Excessively intense expression of feelings is considered a weakness in cruel world men, and women too, are looking for strong, viable partners. However, anyone who believes that a sensitive person is always such simply does not understand what sentimentality is. Only the sensual side of the personality cannot constantly dominate in a person - usually it manifests itself and immediately fades back into the background. Therefore, the sentimental subject can be cruel and inhuman in everyday life, and unbridled tides of sympathy or delight only temporarily hide his true nature.

Is it bad to be sentimental?

There is nothing wrong with someone being driven by sentimentality. The importance of such human qualities as pity or sympathy is greatly underestimated in modern society, built on competition.

The modern world encourages the ruthless removal of any obstacles to wealth. Over time, a person may completely lose qualities such as empathy or kindness, in favor of a meaningless race for material well-being.

Therefore, if you know how to empathize with living beings and feel sorry for those who are in difficult situations, this can become your advantage and fill your life with meaning and beauty. It is only important to competently manage your feelings, otherwise they will begin to control you. What is sentimentality - a gift of fate or a curse? Depending on the person, it can either bring positive experiences or cause negativity and depression. It all depends on you.

Sometimes tears suddenly roll in for no particular reason - I just suddenly remembered something or the music I heard is so beautiful that it’s hard to keep the feelings inside, but I can’t express them in any other way. In all these cases we're talking about about such a feeling as sentimentality.

What does sentimentality mean?

The meaning of the word sentimentality becomes clear, once you look at the French root “sentiment”, which translates as “feeling”. That is, this is a certain property of the psyche, which is characterized by high receptivity and daydreaming. If a person is in a sentimental mood, then all the impressions that he draws from the world around him have an impact not on the mind and thoughts, but, first of all, on feelings.

Sentimental people can show enthusiasm, tenderness, emotion and empathy for no particular reason. They are not indifferent to what others do not pay attention to or do not react so sharply to.

Increased sentimentality

In general, the concept of increased sentimentality is quite individual and depends on the norms of an individual person. For some, it’s normal to shed a tear over a book and squeal with joy when accidentally meeting an old acquaintance, but for others, they cannot afford to show their feelings at a funeral. loved one, because he considers it a sign of weakness.

But if emotional reactions are too strong, a person cannot control them, and shows them inappropriately, then such sentimentality can be defined as excessive.

Increased sentimentality is usually characteristic of women. Men also become more sensitive over time, this is due to age-related changes, in particular, with a reduction in the production of male hormones, but rarely reach the level of the fair half of humanity.

Excessive sentimentality can be constant and situational. If you are used to not keeping feelings to yourself, but openly expressing them in sometimes eccentric ways, and this does not interfere with your life at all, then you should not worry.

But situational sentimentality can manifest itself even in reserved people in connection with a certain mood, state of health or event. We always become more vulnerable under the weight of problems or when something hurts. There is also a risk of losing control over the expression of emotions if you hold them back for a long time. Convincing myself that strong people they don’t cry, and ladies always behave with restraint, you are literally dooming yourself to a breakdown, which can happen suddenly.

How to get rid of sentimentality?

Let's start with the fact that you need to get rid of it only if it really bothers you. Otherwise, such violence against one’s nature is completely unjustified.

Try to realize that you don’t always need to restrain your emotions; there are situations in which they are not only possible, but also necessary, because at the very least it brings people closer together. Most likely, you should control yourself at work, but with your family and alone you don’t have to be ironclad. Do not avoid close contacts; it is extremely important for any person not to experience all moments of joy and sadness alone.

Clearly identify those situations in which you can show emotions and try to experience as many feelings as possible in them and concentrate more strongly on them. This will help you better understand yourself and examine your reactions. You will always know what to expect next. In addition, emotions will not accumulate and will not be able to suddenly burst out.

Try to make this change in your life and after some time give yourself a kind of “sentimentality test”. After all, if you consider yourself a too unrestrained person, you probably have situations in which this manifests itself. Now it’s easy enough to get into them, for example, turn on a movie that you couldn’t watch to the end because of rolling tears. The reaction may not change, but in this case, you should again think carefully about whether you need to fight sentimentality or whether you should accept it.

Or excessive tenderness in expressing feelings; tearful emotion, tenderness.

Modern encyclopedia. 2000 .

Synonyms:

See what “SENTIMENTALITY” is in other dictionaries:

sentimentality- and, f. sentimental, ale adj. 1. Property, quality of sentimental. Sentimentality of relationships. BAS 1. || Excessive sensitivity, sentimental attitude towards someone or something. ALS 1. Sensitivity is irritable, tender, tearful, cloying... Historical Dictionary of Gallicisms of the Russian Language

This is the emotional promiscuity of people who are incapable of any feelings. Norman Mailer We must distinguish sentimentality from sensitivity. A sentimental person may be privacy extremely cruel. A sensitive person... ... Consolidated encyclopedia of aphorisms

Sensitivity, tenderness, tenderness, good-naturedness, sweetness, sentimentality, tearfulness, touching, sweetness, sentimentality Dictionary of Russian synonyms. sentimentality sensitivity; sentiments (colloquially ironic);… … Dictionary of synonyms

Sensitivity, excessive tenderness in expressing feelings, tearful emotion, tenderness... Big Encyclopedic Dictionary

Sentimentality. Sentimental (sweetly sensitive; sentimental). Wed. There will be many people who will accuse me of excessive sentimentality, unnecessary outpourings that no one needs, accuse me of unnaturalness and a desire for... Michelson's Large Explanatory and Phraseological Dictionary (original spelling)

- [se] (or sentimentality), sentimentality, female. 1. units only distracted noun to sentimental in 1 value. “Since I am kind to the point of sentimentality, I cannot be happy alone.” Dostoevsky. 2. Sentimental act; sentimental... ... Dictionary Ushakova

SENTIMENTALITY, and, female. 1. see sentimental. 2. Sentimental act, sentimental expression. Put aside sentimentality. Ozhegov's explanatory dictionary. S.I. Ozhegov, N.Yu. Shvedova. 1949 1992 … Ozhegov's Explanatory Dictionary

- (from French sentiment – ​​feeling) receptivity, dreaminess. In his prod. “Naive and Sentimental Poetry” (“ber naive und sentimentalische Dichtung”, 1795) Friedrich Schiller wrote that naive poetry has all its roots in... ... Philosophical Encyclopedia

- (from the French sentiment “feeling”) mental property, receptivity, daydreaming. A mood in which all external impressions act primarily on feelings, rather than on reason and thoughts. This is a predisposition, emotionally valuable... ... Wikipedia

SENTIMENTALITY, SENTIMENTALITY (French, from sentiment feeling). False direction of sensitivity, cloying sensitivity, tearfulness. Dictionary foreign words, included in the Russian language. Chudinov A.N., 1910. SENTIMENTALITY See... ... Dictionary of foreign words of the Russian language

Books

• Barchester Towers, Anthony Trollope. "Barchester Towers" - the second and most famous novel series "Barchester Chronicles". A novel in which truly Victorian sentimentality coexists with evil, caustic criticism...
• Lecture “Taffy – the angel of Russian literature”, Dmitry Bykov. IN pre-revolutionary Russia Nadezhda Teffi was the “Queen of Humor”, each of her stories became a bestseller, and her popularity was so great that there were even Teffi perfumes and candies. IN…

Anna basis

There are people who can be moved to tears because of yet another melodrama, and for some, even touching personal circumstances do not evoke emotions. What is the reason for such different reactions to events? The point is a person’s personal qualities, or rather, one trait that forces him to take everything too close to his heart and constantly identify himself with strangers and events, worrying for no serious reason. This mental property is called sentimentality - increased receptivity and daydreaming. For such a person, impressions received from the outside world affect the feelings, and not the mind and thoughts. So it turns out that a sentimental person sheds a tear from reading a book, watching the news or a sad story that happened to strangers.

In a certain sense, this trait refers to hypersensitivity, which, even under insignificant circumstances, greatly changes. Such individuals show tenderness, empathy, and tearfulness for any reason. They do not remain indifferent even in situations that do not awaken feelings in other people. Some consider sentimentality to be a type of pity, when a person identifies himself with a disadvantaged object and acutely experiences the emotions inherent in it. However, these concepts should be separated: if pity is compared with chronic disease, then sentimentality is a short and instant attack of illness, followed by inevitable relief.

Is sentimentality good or bad?

It is better to consider each character trait from different angles, from the point of view of necessity and value for a person’s life. Therefore, many people wonder: is being sentimental good or bad? It is impossible to give a definite answer, besides, everything in life is relative. However, it is worth speculating on this matter so that everyone can draw the right conclusion for themselves.

Is it bad when a person is able to heartily empathize with others? Individuals endowed with this quality fully share the sadness and joy of those around them. And how nice it is when, at a wedding ceremony or when being discharged from the maternity hospital, loved ones do not hold back their tears. Perhaps sentimentality in a person is nothing more than a sign of a living, unossified soul. After all, in modern society people are closed and lonely. It is no longer customary to go on a visit without an invitation, to simply help women carry a heavy bag home, and even to give a compliment to a colleague is considered unnecessary by many. Everyone is fixated on their own problems, and openness and naturalness are considered strange and suspicious.

One thing is clear that sentimentality is not a negative character trait, but in a sense important and rare. However, one should not assume that people with this quality are weak. History shows that some famous writers and cruel rulers were sentimental individuals and were touched in certain situations. It follows from this that this character trait does not apply to all spheres of people’s life. Some people are moved to tears by animals, although when communicating with people such a person can be firm and even merciless.

Excessive sentimentality

As it says folk wisdom: everything is good in moderation. It is believed that excessive sentimentality has an adverse effect on the individual and the people around him. However, everything is individual and everyone determines the boundaries of the manifestation of feelings. For some, it is common to squeal with joy at a long-awaited meeting or burst into tears at a sad movie, but for some people such behavior will seem like weakness, and they will hold back their emotions in any circumstances. There are situations when emotions go off scale and a person is no longer able to control them, displaying them in absurd and inappropriate ways. In such cases we are talking about excessive sentimentality.

As a rule, this property psyche is inherent in to a greater extent women. However, the stronger sex also develops sensitivity over time, this is due to a decrease in male hormones and age-related changes in the body.

Excessive sentimentality can manifest itself in different ways: constantly or in certain situations. If a person is used to keeping emotions to himself, but sometimes gives them vent in original ways, this does not harm his state of mind. It is more difficult for people endowed with hypersensitivity, who for some reason cannot openly express feelings. For example, when there is a difficult situation at home or at work, and expressing your feelings seems inappropriate. Constantly holding back strong emotions inevitably leads to a psychological breakdown in an unexpected situation. at the moment. Particularly susceptible to this are people who consider tears to be a sign of weakness, and who think that ladies and gentlemen always behave with restraint and under no circumstances “lose face.”

Nature is much smarter than a person, and it was not in vain that she awarded certain personalities with certain character qualities. In fact sensitive people It is useful to “let off steam”, otherwise contact with the world of emotions may be disrupted. In this case, increased sentimentality is manifested by constant tearfulness or painful sensitivity. So, a girl can constantly cry at the slightest trouble, leading to bewilderment and annoyance of loved ones. To an extreme degree, there is even inappropriate behavior, when a person is so immersed in extraneous events and problems, deeply feeling and worrying about them, that this interferes with normal everyday life and takes you away from your own goals.

How to get rid of excessive sentimentality

When increased sensitivity disturbs personal peace and prevents you from living normally and sleeping soundly, you should study information on how to get rid of excessive sentimentality. This will help restore contact with the world of emotions and get rid of unnecessary worries about any reason. A number of special exercises related to working on the correct and relevant expression of emotions are recommended:

"Here and now." Several times during the day, distract yourself and ask yourself the question: how am I feeling at the moment? And in your mind go through all the emotions you experience. It is better to perform such actions as carefully as possible, to delve into and identify minor shades and subtleties of the state of mind.
You should find out how many words expressing feelings a person uses in everyday life every day. During the period of time allotted for this exercise, you need to increase this number at least twice.
“Empathetic guesses” are fantasies about how others feel. The exercise can be performed anywhere: on the bus, at work, at home. Moreover, it is even worth asking household members about the correctness of the assumptions. Older children should be involved in such activities school age, it will benefit them: against the backdrop of an exciting activity, the vocabulary of feelings will also be replenished.

It is worth understanding that it is not always necessary to suppress emotions: in the circle of loved ones and alone, it is better to take off the mask of indifference and express true feelings. There is no need to shy away from close communication, because it is extremely important for people to share moments of despondency and happiness with others. It will be useful to identify situations that contribute to the manifestation of strong emotions, imagine them and concentrate on the feelings. This will help you more accurately determine your reactions and understand what to expect in the next moment. Thanks to this training, suppressed feelings will not accumulate and will not cause another nervous breakdown.

Still, it’s nice to meet sincere people who are capable of touching emotions and empathy. Sentimentality, shown in moderation, brings bright and rich impressions into everyday life, allowing you to acutely feel sad and sad things. Isn't that what life is all about? And what do closed, gloomy and stingy people say about expressing their feelings - who cares!

March 31, 2014, 09:25

Sentimentality is special kind sensory mood, when external events and impressions influence a person’s feelings and emotions to a greater extent, practically without affecting the mental sphere, the tendency of the psyche to increased receptivity and daydreaming. A feeling of sentimentality can manifest itself as touch, tenderness, delight or empathy in moments that do not cause such reactions in the majority of others, and in its extreme manifestations it can be expressed in increased tearfulness or cloying enthusiasm, bordering on ignoring shortcomings.

The presence of such a worldview does not negate the fact that a person can be aggressive, angry, cynical and skeptical, since sentimentality has a selective meaning and does not apply to all life events. A person can be overly touched by animals and empathize with them, while hating people; he can be moved by a film, but remain indifferent to the events in the store line. Most often, this feeling and sentimental character lends itself to criticism, both in society and in literature, and in society borders on weakness, recklessness and stupidity.

What does sentimentality mean?

Being a property of the psyche, sentimentality is an innate quality, but at the same time its expression and direction can be adjusted, since the prerequisites are exclusively increased sensitivity. When such sensitivity is combined with logical reasoning and accepted responsibility, it takes on the image of sympathy and complicity, helping to better understand people’s behavior, but if it is deprived of the control of reason, then what remains is an exclusively sensual, uncontrolled sphere of sentimentality. In such a state, a person will empathize with others, but also easily succumbs; his experiences are usually devoid of effective activity to change the situation.

In perception different people Sentimentality can take on completely different meanings - for some it is a sign of humanity, but for others it is stupidity and inadequacy. This division is caused by the fact that this personality quality immerses a person in the full experience of any feeling that has arisen, to one hundred percent saturation, while absolutely not involving the mental sphere. No matter how it may seem, sentimentality is akin to sympathy, they are radically different, since the main focus of sympathy is on another person, his needs and problems. In the case of sentimentality, all attention is directed to oneself and one’s experiences; a person seems to revel in one’s feelings, leaving unattended what caused them.

Striving for constant living and enjoying the experience of feelings, a sentimental person easily catches the mood of others and joins in, while he may not completely share the reasons that caused such a state, but this is not the main thing. Roughly speaking, going to a funeral is absolutely stranger, and finding himself among those crying, a sentimental person can also sob avidly with everyone present. The difference is that for others the sadness will remain for a few more days, but for such a sensitive nature it can be lost when confronted around the corner with other experiences and stories.

Pity during sentimentality arises quickly and sharply, so much so that a person may not hold back his tears, but the moment of relief comes just as quickly.

Sentimentality is not an active motivating feeling; this is due both to its transience and to the direction of the vector of attention on one’s own experiences. In a combination of such factors, a person can remain cruel in principle, even just crying over the fate of a stray dog ​​(in ten minutes he will most likely forget about it or may even kick it, but he certainly will not go to the store to buy the dog a sausage).

Sentimentality has a destructive effect both on the establishment of social contacts and on the health of the person himself. Such sensitivity can cause irritation among people around you, and lack of action can cause misunderstanding. The person himself usually tries to restrain excessive manifestations, and even more so tears, which leads to the appearance of psychosomatic diseases or exacerbation of chronic conditions.

Sentimentality in women

The feeling of sentimentality is more characteristic of women and has a completely biological justification for this. Since the woman always remained in the house and had to monitor the slightest changes not only in the surrounding space, but also in the condition of the offspring, developed sensitivity was consolidated at the hormonal level. It was this increased compassion and the ability to vividly experience someone else’s pain as one’s own that ensured the survival of the offspring for many years. Even now, such sensitivity helps maintain health and relationships.

It is natural to consider cases when it is sentimentality that destroys relationships and success in a career stands alone, and here we will talk about increased sentimentality, which makes sense to reduce a little.

When assessing your condition, remember that it is your success and inner sense of self that are the markers normal level sentimentality. Women are more sensitive and show their emotions more often, this is normal, and moreover, a woman who tries to constantly keep everything to herself eventually turns into a stone statue or acquires a huge number of diseases, the basis of which will be excessive stress.

When trying to listen to your man’s reproaches for increased tearfulness, remember that the hormonal system affects not only our appearance, but also on behavioral and emotional manifestation. By trying to reduce their sensitivity (or its manifestations) to that of a man, women go against nature. It makes sense to learn to realize this quality differently than constantly crying into your own strong shoulder. Perhaps these will be meetings with girlfriends, or perhaps, when you feel that you have become hypersensitive, watching a melodrama alone will help relieve these feelings.

Sentimentality in men

Men's sentimentality causes a lot of controversy, and they are conducted both in women's circles and with various combinations of representatives of different sexes. The idea that a man should be an indestructible rock that will not move or cry, no matter what happens, continues to exist. Manifestations of courage and logical assessment of the situation are the main masculine qualities, but gentleness, indecision and tearfulness are rightfully given more for women. Here, not only the distribution was worked on public opinion, but nature itself.

Sensitivity and sentimentality are regulated hormonal levels, which is why with age, when male hubbub decreases, men become more sensitive and softer, for some this may be due to an initial imbalance. But all the other excesses were introduced by upbringing and the classic “boys don’t cry.” The truth is that men are not as insensitive as they appear to be. In addition, such a performance usually turns out to be of no use to anyone. Most women want more sympathy and warmth from their chosen one, and out of two candidates they will choose the one who, being touched, will take home a stray kitten, and not the one who will drive it away. A woman will not be next to a very courageous and strong, but heartless man who is unable to sincerely experience the pain of other people. The only good thing is that this stereotype is conditionally imposed and efforts are being made to implement it.

It is necessary, on a social and personal level, to give men permission to show their sentimentality, since most often we are talking about its lack in life. It’s another matter if male sentimentality begins to exceed even female sensitivity. Such cases are quite rare, but they do occur and then it is possible to say that the man is in an unstable condition or is going through a period of crisis, perhaps he received a serious injury. Take a closer look at your partner and if you notice a sharp increase in the level of sentimentality, be as careful and delicate as possible. If nothing serious happened and you initially have such a man in front of you, then there is a high probability of developmental and educational problems - perhaps he is simply accustomed to using an exaggerated expression of feelings for manipulation. Women are really touched by men's tears and experiences; this can quickly bring them closer together or force a woman to take actions to save a man's fate.

Before reacting to something like this from your sensitive-sentimental part, you should try to include logical analysis situations and evaluate what is happening fully. Cases of manipulation and artificial enhancement of sensitivity are truly rare, and men try to hide their manifestations.

How to get rid of sentimentality

By completely erasing sentimentality from your life, you turn into an insensitive and rather cruel person. The inability to empathize will clearly reduce the circle of your contacts and reduce the number of people who treat you well. It makes sense to reduce or get rid of excessive sentimentality when it begins to interfere with building adequate relationships and spoils your well-being.

To better control these manifestations, you will have to get to know your sensory sphere in detail. To do this, set aside a certain time period every day when you will immerse yourself in your own world and become familiar with the feelings that exist there. There is no need to try to cover everything that has happened to you in your life; focus on the present moment and track the feelings and thoughts that appear now. It is important not to go into the direction of only sensory or only mental experience, but try to perceive all this at the same time. Such training with the next situation that touches the strings of the soul will help you notice not only an emotional outburst, but also the arguments of the mind regarding the situation. In addition, the ability to navigate your feelings will also help you not to become immersed in other people’s feelings, because knowing your own nuances, you can already understand when it is sincere pity for a person, and when it is a similar situation and your own unshed tears. In the first case, it is important to help another, in the second it is necessary to take care of yourself and make the events of the past less traumatic by living through them, possibly in the presence of a psychotherapist.

An important point is to learn to distinguish between situations when it is appropriate to show increased sensitivity and when it is not. If you are at work, then your tears are unlikely to be appropriate, just like with your family during a joyful event. It is necessary to learn to notice these impulses, but not in order to restrain them and store them in a dark box, accumulating your own internal tension, but in order to communicate with them at a more appropriate time. You can set aside special times for this or simply take advantage of moments when you are alone in order to fully release what has accumulated inside. Then you can cry and laugh, scream and beat pillows - the main thing is that the feelings are poured out completely. The more often you carry out such events, the easier it will become to control periodic attacks, since the more pent-up emotions, the higher the likelihood that they will erupt in an unrecoverable avalanche at the most inopportune moment.

While learning such control, develop sensitivity to your emotional sphere, and if tears roll in from serious and real pain, then you should not endure it and hold it back. When a loved one dies, a loved one leaves, you are fired from work, or when your child has taken the first step, the examination results are good, an important project is approved - crying, screaming with joy, fighting in hysterics, hugging everyone who passes by is a normal and adequate reaction regardless of the situation and your location. It all depends on the relevance and real importance of the situation; there are living people around you who will understand and support your experiences regarding something important, but are unlikely to be accomplices of your more far-fetched experience.