Changes in life. How to decide to make changes in life? How to change yourself and your life? Where to start? How to create changes in your life Are changes necessary in a person’s life?

Everything changes - this is the immutable law of the Universe, and those who have realized and accepted it always ride on the crest of change and can get where they want. For those who deny changes, are not ready for them and are not open to new things, changes are covered by a terrible wave, after which they often have to rebuild their life anew. It is clear to the naked eye that the first option is preferable for every person, and anyone can master readiness for change at a deep level. It is this issue that our article today is devoted to.

Changes in life: instruction manual

The first thing you need to do is stop being afraid of change. - a negative force that constrains and paralyzes your resources, which you must deal with if you do not want to live your whole life trembling with fear for your property, position and established way of life. It will be much easier to do this if you understand that
Change is a natural and continuous process. They have always happened, are happening and will happen to everyone, including you. If you accept as an axiom that nothing can be immutable and permanent, you will see how unproductive attachments to the status quo appear. The more you want to keep today's reality unchanged (stability at work, in terms of income, personal life), the more changes will befall you. This will happen until you learn to accept change and let it into your life with a fresh breath of wind. How to do this?
Start viewing any change in your life as positive. Changes themselves do not carry a positive or negative charge, we assign it to them, and this determines not only our emotional state, but also what we ultimately get from the changes. Tune in advance to the fact that any changes will bring you benefits and new opportunities, and do not give in to the desire to fall into or as a result of particularly large-scale changes in life.
To practice, take any change that has already happened to you (or imagine) and break it down, preferably in writing. When you found out about the upcoming or already occurring change in your life, what did you feel - was your first reaction negative, were you afraid? How did events develop further - did you try to resist the changes or submissively bowed your head, like a defeated person and decided “let everything burn in a blue flame, and I’ll start over”? Try to step back and look at the situation from a different angle: every change is a choice, it presents several opportunities. It’s easiest to see the negative ones (that’s how our consciousness works), but positive, resourceful options are also always present.
The next time any change in your life happens to you (or you find out that one is coming), immediately emotionally separate from the process and do not get involved in it. Be an outside observer: there is a person, there are changes; the person knows that these changes are positive and bring new opportunities, but cannot yet see them. Help him (that is, yourself), because a look from the outside always has a different perspective. Find not just positive aspects in the upcoming changes, but also points of growth - options by choosing which a person will use the changes to his advantage.

It is very important to reverse the negative reaction to changes in life, otherwise you will continue to create additional difficulties for yourself. Think for yourself - when everything is good, a person is absolutely happy with everything, his development stops - why do anything if everything is already so wonderful? At such moments, changes come - in order to push us to the next step, and we grimace, get scared and cry, misinterpreting the purpose of life changes. If you are always open and ready for change, you yourself determine the direction in which your life moves and changes, in addition, you have more opportunities for self-improvement. This constructive approach not only opens up new possibilities, but also makes life easier - so much is freed from fighting the windmills of change, and you can channel it in a creative direction.

Change is always hard. And it’s even harder when it’s a big change - breaking up with a loved one, quitting a job, starting your own business and other situations when you need to make a difficult choice. But even when it's obvious that change will bring benefits, it can be difficult to implement, and here's why.

We are worried. How do we know if we made the right decision?
We'd like to know more. How can you make a decision without having all the information?
We feel stuck. How to overcome fear and move on, doing what you want?

Of course, I don't have all the answers. But there are seven tips that will help you decide to make changes.

1. Accept the lack of complete information

We often avoid making decisions simply because we want to know more before we take the next step. Yes, of course, you need to study all the details... But you will have to wait a very long time, waiting for a crystal clear answer. Life is a series of questions, mistakes and corrections. Make the best decision you can make at that particular moment and keep moving forward.

2. Start trusting yourself

We find various excuses to avoid change, but the main limitation is not trusting ourselves. We fear that when we find ourselves in a new situation, we won't know what to do or how to react. We worry that it will be difficult to navigate the uncharted territory of the future.

Believe in yourself. Have you dealt with surprises before? For example, when a tire blew out on the way to work, how did it end? Or when you suddenly fell? After all, you're fine now. Find the courage to trust yourself. No matter what happens, you will figure out what to do about it.

3. Imagine the worst possible outcome

Like jealousy, most fears live only in the head. When you imagine the worst case scenario, you will realize that there are very few risks from which you cannot recover.

You don't have to change the world right now, you just need to make changes in your own world

Ask yourself, “What's the worst that could happen?” Once you realize that even the worst is not so bad, you will be ready to overcome it.

4. Value the process as much as the result.

We get so caught up in the results that we worry that while we're working towards a big goal, we never reach the finish line. In fact, we have every right to change our minds. Even more: if you don't achieve your goal, it doesn't mean you've lost. You set this goal yourself, it was your choice. You have the right to change it halfway through. Failure is not a destination, neither is success. Enjoy the process of moving forward.

5. Keep pursuing opportunities.

If you're on the fence about making a decision, you may be afraid of ending up in a situation where you have no way out. Think about it differently. New alternatives are rarely limiting, quite the contrary. One of the most rewarding things is that when you pursue a goal day after day, new opportunities open up for you that you never thought of before. If you don't miss them along the way, you can be sure that you will always have a choice.

6. Put in the effort - it's important

It seems basic, but one of the main reasons why change doesn't happen is because we simply don't even try. It's so easy to come up with excuses for why we don't get what we want. Did you fail the test? Are you stupid? “Of course I’m not stupid. I just didn't teach. I would definitely get an “excellent” if I had learned.” Stuck in a job you hate? So why haven't you found a new one yet? “Well, I haven't actually tried to find a new job yet. If only I wanted to, I could easily pass the interview.”

Why do we make up excuses? We are afraid that failure will make us failures. But if we don’t try, we can attribute everything to laziness. Get over it. Failures happen to everyone. If you take a chance - and most people don't even try - you will win much more than you thought.

7. Start with something feasible.

You can't climb Everest unless you start training early. Maybe finding your dream job is scary. Where to start today? For example, talk to someone who already works in such a position. Find out what makes them successful. Can you improve your skills to meet the right requirements? You don't have to change the world right now, you just need to make changes in your own world.

About the Author: James Clear is an entrepreneur, weightlifter, travel photographer, blogger and writer. He studies behavioral psychology and studies the habits of successful people - businessmen, artists, athletes - to understand what helps them be effective.

1. Don't fuss. Take time to sort out your life

To change your life, you need time. If you're always busy and don't have time to even think about how you can change your life for the better, you won't have time to take action. Stop, don’t fuss, take time to understand where you need to go, what to do.

2. Be ready for change

Willingness to change is very important. This is your life. No one can change your life but you. And since your life today was created by your own hands, in order for it to change, you, first of all, need to change yourself. If you yourself do not want to change, nothing in this world will force you to do it.

To find the willingness to take action, you must first understand that you can always change your life for the better. No matter how good or bad she is, she can always get better.

3. Take responsibility for your life.

To change your life for the better, you must take responsibility for your life. Do not blame other people, the country, the boss, or evil fate for your failures. Whether your life goes up or down is up to you. Once you accept responsibility, change will become available to you. Because this will mean that you are ready for decisive action and are not going to look for excuses.

4. Stay grounded in your values.

What do you think is the most valuable thing in life? What should the world around you be like for you to live happily? What can you do to change your world and make it like the world of your dreams?

Deep in your heart are your true values. Find them. These are the values and principles you can rely on. Find them and keep them in mind at all times. They will help you change your life for the better. This is very powerful support.

5. Find motivation

Answer yourself the question: “Why do I need to change my life? What will this give me? What will happen if you don’t change anything?”

Understand the most important reason why you want to change your life. Think about it... Don't forget about your vector. This is very important!

Change is not easy because there is inertia that you need to overcome. You will need a strong source of energy to overcome your life inertia. Your reason, your motivation, is your source of energy. And it will give you strength.

6. Replace limiting beliefs with promoting ones.

Limiting beliefs are the biggest obstacle to life change. You must identify them before you can fight them. To do this, track your thoughts containing phrases:

"I can't …"
“I'm not able to...”
“This is too much for me...”
“There is no way out...”
“This is difficult for me...”
“Others do better than me...”
“I don’t have enough capabilities for this...”
Write them down. After some time, look at your list. These are your limiting beliefs.

After identifying your limiting beliefs, you must replace them with promoting beliefs that open up new opportunities for you. Write down positive statements to counter the negative ones you wrote down earlier. It is best to write them down in the form of affirmations and repeat them daily. Until following them becomes a habit for you.

7. Replace bad habits with positive habits

In addition to identifying your limiting beliefs, you must also identify your bad habits. Which of your habits are preventing you from getting to where you will be happy? What habits are dragging you down? What habits would you like to break? List them. Write them down on a piece of paper.

Instead of trying to get rid of these habits, focus on creating new positive habits to replace them. For example, a bad habit is to watch too much TV. Create a positive habit to make the best use of this time. For example, start reading more.

8. Find a mentor

If you feel that you don’t have enough personal measures at the moment, you should find an assistant. It can be any person, a specialist, or just your friend who will help you systematically move forward. It will help you in difficult times and warn you about possible pitfalls on your way. Without a mentor, you will have to go through much more difficulties and trials. Having a mentor will save a lot of your time.

Getting a good mentor is not easy. Don't expect someone to easily agree to spend time and effort on you without getting anything in return. At the very least, you must show yourself to be an open and understanding person. Also, try to be helpful to your mentor. Help him, you can make his job easier. This way you will demonstrate your seriousness.

9. Set realistic goals

Having the initially correct expectation that matches your desires and capabilities is very important. Otherwise, you will easily become discouraged when things are not going as you expected. This can unsettle you and force you to retreat from your plans.

Track milestones along your journey to ensure you're always on the right track.

Changing your life takes time, especially if you want the changes to last. Having the right expectation of a realistic goal will give you perseverance in difficult times.

10. Keep the energy up

The most difficult thing is the beginning. Once it is left behind, it will be much easier for you. The main thing is to maintain the momentum. This is the same mechanism as a car. The hardest part is getting the car to start moving. After this, it will move quite easily until you decide to stop it. The main thing is to refuel it on time, do a technical inspection, and take care of its condition. This way he will always be at your disposal.

We are worried. How do we know if we made the right decision?
We'd like to know more. How can you make a decision without having all the information?
We feel stuck. How to overcome fear and move on, doing what you want?

Of course, I don't have all the answers. But there are seven tips that will help you decide to make changes.

1. Accept the lack of complete information

2. Start trusting yourself

3. Imagine the worst possible outcome

Like jealousy, most fears live only in the head. When you imagine the worst case scenario, you will realize that there are very few risks from which you cannot recover.

You don't have to change the world right now, you just need to make changes in your own world

Ask yourself, “What's the worst that could happen?” Once you realize that even the worst is not so bad, you will be ready to overcome it.

4. Value the process as much as the result.

5. Keep pursuing opportunities.

6. Put in the effort - it's important

7. Start with something feasible.

They can go so fast that it seems as if nothing is permanent in the world. Friends appear and disappear. There is property today, but not tomorrow. Our childhood home is being demolished to replace it with an office building. The baby grows into an adult. People get closer and break up. People are dying.

At some point in our lives, we may decide that we are “heartbroken.” This could be due to the loss of a loved one, a deterioration in physical or mental health, or the loss of a job that provides us with the income we need.

Some cherished goals that we have set for ourselves may remain unfulfilled.

And if you look at the universe from a different point of view, you can see that everything lives and grows. Everything is in joyful movement. New combinations appear. A new beauty touches our soul. New opportunities arise. Adventures are waiting to happen to us!

When the stormy waves of change reach our lives (and they say that change is the only thing that is constant in life), their effect can be painful if we have become too attached to material things in our hearts or are too convinced of the erroneous idea that constancy exists . And in the absence of the ability to adapt to changes and accept them, they can painfully wound our hearts. How to endure the pain of losses that sooner or later touch everyone’s life? If we are open to the presence of God in every change in life, then we calmly ride the crest of the wave of change.

When a seed is sown into the darkness of the earth, its outer shell must be destroyed for new life to emerge. Jesus said:

“Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, then only one remains; and if she dies, she will bear much fruit” (John 12:24).

When our outer shell is painfully destroyed, when it seems to us that our heart is breaking, it is important to learn the lesson that Jesus wanted to teach us.

Every time we lose something, we can gain something at the same time.

In this case, we can understand and appreciate that life offers us inexplicable experiences that cannot always be interpreted through experience. This understanding becomes a precious gift in itself. We may feel that if only we could do everything “right,” we wouldn’t experience pain. But life often turns out to be much more complex and mysterious.

The gift can be received at the moment of loss. The very pain we experience can be caused by the shell of our understanding, our wisdom, our maturity and compassion being destroyed, releasing its gift, the new life hidden within it. This awareness is not morphine, which can dull or turn off the pain we experience. Rather, it is a means of opening ourselves up to the mystery of pain, what it can give us as well as what it takes from us. Perhaps we would welcome the prospect of change more joyfully if we remembered that the path of life always leads forward, towards progress.

And when you live and develop, change is inevitable.

Have you ever thought that saying, “Now is not the time for change,” is the same as saying, “I don’t have time to receive a blessing right now”? It is very important to grow - physically, mentally and spiritually. When changes come in our lives, this indicates that we must be ready to accept them - joyfully and with delight. Have faith in the capacity of your soul, realize that the fullness of divine love and wisdom can be present within you and serve as an inexhaustible source for you. By internally preparing for change, you can get used to the idea of it.

The next time you feel the shell that covers your heart being destroyed, feel it fully and deeply and take comfort in the fact that, through pain, you become more compassionate and wise, both towards others and towards yourself. Challenges can be a precious and rewarding gift. Challenges can be milestones in your mental and spiritual growth. Find the strength to welcome change and enjoy the opportunity to grow and develop spiritually.

From Pythagoras, the ancient Greek philosopher, we learn that “the man who cannot command himself is not free.” Through life experiences, often acquired during times of change, we can master our emotions, our mind and body, our thoughts and feelings - and become better people because of it.

In the time allotted to us, we must live and work so that what we got as a seed is passed on to the next generation as a flower, and what we get as a flower is passed on to them as a fruit. This is what we understand as code progress.

Henry Ward Beecher

By limiting one's activities to one narrow area, without taking advantage of the benefits of change or distraction, a person can come to such emptiness that sometimes kills the imagination.

Edward J. Uhl