Family well-being. Family well-being is the key to a healthy child Family well-being

There is nothing more important in our life than family, which provides support, warmth and happiness. Any disagreements, troubles, quarrels and separations in a loving family are very difficult to experience. To avoid this, you need to read prayers for family well-being.

The role of family in our life

God gives us parents. We do not choose them, we only accept what the Creator gave us. In Christianity, great attention is paid to the family, since honoring parents is one of the most important rules that should be followed.

For various reasons, family well-being can leave us, this happens to many families. You can return happiness and God's grace only through prayers and faith in God. If everything is fine with you now, also remember the Almighty. Prosperity does not mean that you can forget about prayers, since truly the strongest of them are thanksgiving. Thanks to God for the fact that he does not leave us with his mercy, we can avoid most troubles.

Prayers for family

If you have a problem in which only God’s hand is able to pull you out of the abyss, the following prayer will help:

Lord Jesus Christ, awaken Your mercy on my children (names), keep them under Your roof, cover them from all evil lust, drive away from them every enemy and adversary, open their ears and the eyes of their hearts, grant tenderness and humility to their hearts. Lord, we are all Your creation, have pity on my children (names), and turn them to repentance. Save, O Lord, and have mercy on my children (names) and enlighten their minds with the light of the mind of Your Gospel and guide them on the path of Your commandments and teach them, O Savior, to do Your will, for You are our God. Amen.

Everyone reading these lines will be able to receive the mercy of God, which we sometimes lack so much. Read this prayer more often, not only in times of acute need, and then happiness awaits you. Here is a prayer of thanksgiving:

Most Blessed Lady, take my family under Your protection. Instill in the hearts of my husband and our children peace, love and non-questioning of all that is good; Do not allow anyone from my family to experience separation and difficult parting, to premature and sudden death without repentance. And save our house and all of us living in it from fiery ignition, thieves’ attacks, every evil of the situation, various types of insurance and devilish obsession. Yes, and we, collectively and separately, openly and secretly, will glorify Your Holy Name always, now and ever, and forever and ever. Amen. Most Holy Theotokos, save us!

Reading these lines from the bottom of your heart, you truly thank heaven for giving you peace, health and mutual understanding. This is a universal prayer that will save you in difficult periods. Miraculous words return spouses to the right path, heal parents and children, and smooth out any disagreements.

Ask God for happiness, because it doesn’t take much time. Spend at least five minutes a day in prayer - God can give you spiritual wealth, the highest good in the world. Be happy and don't forget to press the buttons and

11.02.2016 00:40

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It is known that any marriage union in the process of development experiences not only happy periods, but also stages of crises. There is no family that does not face various problems or misunderstandings in specific situations, and this is not an exception to the rule: rather, a pattern. It is simply important to understand that in order to achieve family well-being, it is necessary to fight such crises through joint efforts, as well as to build harmonious relationships in a marriage. In this article we will look at the main factors and conditions that promote mutual understanding in a married couple and strengthen a marriage.

Factors of family well-being

The first condition for family well-being, of course, is the love and affection of the spouses. And hardly anyone will deny the importance of such feelings in this matter. At the same time, it should be noted that a marriage based on love alone cannot last for a long time. After all, the mutual passion and romantic mood that characterizes the initial period of a relationship does not last as long as we would like.

This is explained by the force of habit, since sooner or later a person gets used to his partner and no longer strives to win his love with the same force. It is a mistake to believe that at this stage feelings fade away and harsh life begins. After all, in order to achieve family well-being, it is necessary to approach such a turn of events with understanding and confidence that it will not interfere with real feelings.

If spouses expect that mutual passion at the beginning of a relationship will be enough for them to live a happy life together for many years, they will very soon doubt their beliefs. After all, a marriage is not only romantic walks in the evenings and beautiful declarations of love: a family also involves a common life, and, consequently, worries and problems. Not everyone is ready for such a test, which is why many couples get divorced without living together for several years.

Experts have identified the main factors of family well-being that should be taken into account by everyone who is planning to start a life together with a loved one:

Focus on spouse;
Sympathy and trust;
Communication without conflicts;
Understanding;
Sexual satisfaction;
Material well-being.

Focus on the spouse is the most important condition for family well-being, since it serves as the basis for mutual understanding. It involves attentive attention to the interests, preferences, and habits of a loved one. Ideally, spouses should take their actions only taking into account each other's desires and needs.

Sympathy and trust are also necessary factors for family well-being, because if you don’t feel sympathy for the person you are going to live with, the marriage is doomed to failure. And when there is no trust in a relationship, love gradually fades away, as its place is taken by eternal suspicions, jealousy and discontent.

Normal communication without constant quarrels and conflicts should be present in every good family. People need to share their emotions, impressions and experiences with loved ones, so you need to create an atmosphere at home that encourages spouses to have mutual frankness and trusting relationships.

Mutual understanding is one of the most important conditions for family well-being. In order to achieve it, the spouses will need a lot of time and trials. But the key point here is condescension and tolerance towards each other, which are excellent qualities for creating a strong family.

Sexual satisfaction also very often comes with years of marriage, since partners do not immediately recognize each other’s preferences: this takes time and desire. When people are connected by mutual strong feelings, almost all problems of a sexual nature are solvable. This is due to the strong desire of both to please their spouse.

An important factor in family well-being is also the financial security of the family. It's no secret that financial difficulties, which are chronic, very quickly affect the relationship of a married couple. Everyday problems that cannot be solved, debts and nervous stress caused by all this prevent people from enjoying their feelings and living in harmony. After all, the lion's share of family conflicts is related to the topic of money.

Symbols of family well-being

Recently, the teaching of Feng Shui has become widespread, with the help of which many people invite material security, harmony in relationships and love into their home. To do this, you just need to know what the main symbols of family well-being exist in this teaching:

Aquarium;
Turtle;
Dragon;
Phoenix.

The aquarium is one of the main symbols of family well-being in material terms. It is believed that it attracts money to the house, so it is best to place goldfish in it and, of course, do not forget to feed them and clean the aquarium on time.

The turtle is also a symbol of material wealth and health, so it is advisable to get a live aquatic turtle that will live in the aquarium: this combination should provide a double effect.

The dragon is a symbol of family well-being, success in business and career growth. In addition, experts believe that it gives the inhabitants of the house a special energy that develops qualities such as determination and endurance.

The phoenix acts as a complement to the dragon, since in Chinese mythology they are considered spouses. It provides the family with fame, success and strong relationships. In addition, if it is placed in the southern part of the house, then such a talisman will protect family members from all kinds of negative influences from the outside.

At the same time, it should be remembered that the best symbols of family well-being are, first of all, love and mutual understanding in a marriage.

Olga Nosul
Family well-being is the key to a healthy child

REPORT ON THE TOPIC:

« FAMILY WELL-BEING IS THE KEY TO A HEALTHY CHILD»

How, the word appeared: "FAMILY"?

It is there from the first moments of life

with each of us.

Family is home, parents, loved ones, relatives.

"IN family we are growing around you,

The basis, the basis is the parental home"

Law "On Education" (v. 18) places all responsibility for raising children on the family and all other social institutions (including preschool institutions) are designed to promote and complement family educational activities.

« Healthy children -

V healthy family,

Healthy families -

V healthy country.

Healthy countries -

planet healthy.

Health, –

what a wonderful word!

So let it be healthy planet,

Grow - healthy children!

A healthy family is a healthy nation

The task of the state is to raise healthy children and prolong the lives of its citizens. Today, issues of preserving and strengthening health people in Russia are given special attention, and they are rightfully included in the priority national project « Health» .

Our country is actively working to create healthy lifestyle among the population. Of course, a nation must be healthy. healthy a nation is a sign of a strong state. One of the main factors in the prosperity of a nation is healthy family. What's happened healthy family?

A healthy family is a family which leads healthy lifestyle, which contains healthy psychological climate, spiritual culture, material wealth.

Today, the family plays a leading role in shaping healthy lifestyle. The family is the main link where good habits are formed and bad ones are rejected.

First impressions baby, associated with the performance of a certain action, are drawn from home life.

The child sees, perceives, tries to imitate, and this action is consolidated in him regardless of his fragile will.

Habits, traditions, lifestyle, attitude towards one’s life developed over the years in the family health and wellness others are transferred child into adulthood and into a newly created family.

If adults teach children from a very early age to value, protect and strengthen their health, if they demonstrate by personal example healthy lifestyle, then only in this case can we hope that future generations will be more healthy and developed not only personally, intellectually, spiritually, but also physically.

The task is not only to prepare the child for life, but also to provide him with a full life now. And a full life can only be in prosperous family. Joint activities of parents and children to strengthen health and healthy management lifestyle can solve the problem health of the nation.

In our difficult times - a time of economic and social reforms, life values have changed. Today we spend most of our time at work, trying to earn as much as possible. Today, unfortunately, many of us have stopped taking care of our health, is a thing of the past concept « healthy lifestyle» . Many of us have lost "culture" healthy lifestyle, nutrition. The adult population often leads a sedentary lifestyle. The result is overweight or obesity, which many people have been fighting in vain for a long time.

It must also be remembered that sport is the basis health.

Sport can and should solve certain social problems.

Sport can strengthen a family if adults and children spend their free time on the sports ground.

The art of leading healthy the lifestyle is accessible to everyone, you just need to have a great desire and willpower, you need to overcome your weaknesses and your laziness. Bad habits are easier to prevent than to get rid of them later.

People say: « Healthy - everything is great!» . This simple and wise truth should always be remembered. Today, every person must understand that he health and family health, first of all, depend on himself. First of all, it is necessary for everyone to take personal responsibility for their own health and health of your family.

Health and healthy lifestyle. Basic concepts.

Health, as defined by WHO, is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not just the absence of diseases and physical defects.

Health of a person and society as a whole depends on many social, natural and biological factors. Scientists claim that health people are 50–55% determined by lifestyle, 20–25% by environmental factors, 20% by biological factors (hereditary) factors and 10% – medicine.

Lifestyle is a set of typical activities of a person, a social group, society as a whole, which is taken in unity with living conditions. This concept is quite broad.

At every stage of its development, humanity has always had in its arsenal such norms of life, which, ultimately, were aimed at the creation and creation of material and spiritual values, at the transformation and prosperity of society, at the development of man, at the revelation of his moral traits, mental and physical abilities and capabilities. The progressiveness of humanity, in the final analysis, has always been predetermined by its ability to self-improvement, to the most complete development of man himself, to lead him (by humanity) normal and only reasonable healthy lifestyle.

It is necessary to understand the concept itself more clearly - healthy lifestyle.

Below we present some of the definitions of healthy lifestyle, which occur in the literature:

« Healthy way of life - a rational way of life, an integral feature of which is active activity aimed at preserving and improving health».

« Healthy way of life... can be characterized as the active activity of people, aimed primarily at preserving and improving health».

“A healthy lifestyle is a purposeful form of behavior that ensures the preservation and long-term maintenance of mental and physical health, as well as increasing the body’s adaptive capabilities.”

« A healthy lifestyle is, first of all, a cultural way of life, civilized, humanistic.”

"Under healthy way of life... is understood as one in which the body’s reserves are preserved or expanded.”

« Healthy way of life is a typical set of forms and methods of everyday cultural activity of an individual, based on cultural norms, values, meanings of activity and strengthening the adaptive capabilities of the body.”

« Healthy lifestyle is a mobile combination of forms and methods of daily life that comply with hygienic principles, strengthen the adaptive and resistant capabilities of the body, contribute to the effective restoration, maintenance and development of reserve capabilities, and the optimal performance of social and professional functions by the individual.”

Healthy way of life - a set of norms and rules of life historically tested by time and practice, aimed at to man:

He was able to work highly efficiently and economically, rationally spend strength, knowledge and energy in the process of his professional, socially useful activities;

Possessed the skills and abilities of recovery and health improvement body after hard work;

He constantly deepened his moral convictions, became spiritually enriched, developed and improved his physical qualities and abilities;

Independently supported and strengthened his health and completely rejected those harmful to health habits of self-destructive behavior.

Thus, health- a state of physical, mental and social well-being.

Conclusion: Only in the house, only in the family child gains invaluable experience. Family, allows child feel:

Stability of lifestyle;

Gives a feeling of confidence in the world around us and security;

Promotes optimism and a positive perception of life;

Creates unique childhood memories that child will someday tell his children;

Allows you to feel proud of yourself and your family.

The main thing for parents is to show their children what a hearth is, a home where you are loved and welcome, and healthy climate, an atmosphere filled with love, mutual understanding, and respect will provide good support for the rest of your life. After all, only in favorable environment child can fully develop physically and mentally, and you need to understand that adults and parents bear responsibility for this.

We must remember that any rules are good if they make life better and do not complicate it. Rigid traditions have a depressing effect on the spontaneous child’s psyche, so you need to work on yourself in order to once again assess your capabilities, prevent embitterment and alienation of children, establish closer contact, and give the kindness of your soul every day.

We wish families success in raising their children. After all, children are not only our future, but also our present.

A specialist in psychosocial work is familiar with the problem of analyzing factors of family well-being - adversity. The complexity of the family as a social system and psychological community of people of different gender, age, social and professional affiliation leads to the fact that attempts to identify a complete list of such factors may be unsuccessful. Therefore, when discussing this problem, we usually talk about attempts to identify the most significant factors and indicators of family well-being. One of the integral indicators is the psychological compatibility of spouses (family members in general).

People who create a family strive to satisfy a complex of needs - for love, for children, for experiencing common joys, for understanding, for communication. However, the formation of a family is not only the implementation of ideal ideas about marriage that future spouses have developed. This is the real life of two, and then several people, in all its complexity and diversity; it includes continuous negotiations, concluding agreements, compromises and, of course, overcoming difficulties and resolving conflicts that exist in every family.

Failure in marriage is largely determined by errors in choosing a partner: the chosen one in reality either does not possess the necessary personality traits, or the totality of his psychophysiological characteristics, views and values does not correspond to the ideas and needs of the chooser. Disappointment can occur regardless of the fact that the partner has many positive qualities. It is very important that the husband and wife are suitable for each other based on biological and moral factors, reflecting various aspects of upbringing, political, cultural, religious views, and also that the partners are tolerant of each other’s characteristics.

Let's consider the most important prerequisites for future family, including marital, well-being.

Psychobiological compatibility. We are talking about “indefinable inner sympathy,” which can be based on such clear reasons as admiration for talent, achieved success, social status or an external aesthetic ideal. A marriage without spontaneous attraction usually does not guarantee a successful marriage.

A harmonious marriage presupposes the social maturity of the spouses, preparedness for active participation in the life of society, the ability to financially provide for their family, duty and responsibility, self-control and flexibility. The most successful marriages are those of people who value reliability, fidelity, love for family and strong character in their partners. In an “ideal marriage”, spouses most often possess such personality traits as self-control, hard work, caring, dedication and flexibility of behavior.

Factors that have an indirect impact on the well-being of married life. It is important to know what the marital relationship of the chosen one’s parents was like, what the family structure is, the financial level of the family, what negative phenomena are observed in the family and in the character of the parents. Even a small family trauma often leaves a deep mark, forming negative views and attitudes in the child. Sometimes insurmountable conflicts are inevitable where partners are diametrically different in their worldview.

Education. Higher education does not always increase the level of stability of family relationships. Even in a marriage concluded between two young people who have graduated from higher educational institutions, conflicts may arise, which, if not resolved in a timely manner, will give rise to divorce. However, the intellectual level and characters of the partners should not differ excessively.

Labor stability. People who frequently change jobs are characterized by instability, excessive dissatisfaction, and inability to establish long-term relationships.

Age determines the social maturity of partners and their readiness to fulfill marital and parental responsibilities. The most optimal age is 20-24 years. The most natural age difference between spouses is 1-4 years. The stability of so-called unequal marriages largely depends not only on the character of both partners, on their mutual feelings, but also on preparedness for age-related characteristics, on the ability to resist the “slander” of others, etc.

Duration of acquaintance. During the dating period, it is important to get to know each other well, not only in optimal conditions, but also in difficult situations, when the personal qualities and character weaknesses of the partner are clearly manifested. It is possible, as is customary now, to live together for some time in order to get comfortable, get used to each other’s characteristics.

All these factors create the preconditions for the emergence of marital compatibility and incompatibility. Psychological incompatibility is the inability to understand a friend’s fugue in critical situations. In a marriage, each spouse can act as a “psycho-traumatic factor,” for example, when one of the spouses is an obstacle to meeting the needs of the other. Psychological compatibility is defined as mutual acceptance of partners in communication and joint activities, based on the optimal combination - similarity or complementarity - of value orientations, personal and psychophysiological characteristics. Psychological compatibility of subjects is a multi-level and multi-aspect phenomenon. In family interaction, it includes psychophysiological compatibility; personal compatibility, including cognitive (comprehension of ideas about oneself, other people and the world as a whole), emotional (experience of what is happening in the external and internal world of a person), behavioral (external expression of ideas and experiences); compatibility of values, or spiritual compatibility.

Thus, the harmony of family and marital relations from the point of view of personal parameters is determined by several basic elements:

the emotional side of marital relations, the degree of attachment;
the similarity of their ideas, visions of themselves, their partner, and the social world as a whole;
the similarity of communication models preferred by each partner, behavioral characteristics;
sexual and, more broadly, psychophysiological compatibility of partners;
general cultural level, the degree of mental and social maturity of the partners, the coincidence of the value systems of the spouses.

The value and psychophysiological compatibility of people is especially important in family and marriage relationships. All other types of compatibility or incompatibility are subject to dynamic changes and can be changed quite easily in the process of mutual adaptation of family members or during psychotherapy. Value and psychophysiological incompatibility cannot be corrected or is very difficult to correct.

Psychophysiological, and in particular sexual, incompatibility can lead to the breakdown of a marriage. And the mismatch of values in the interaction of people, especially in everyday contacts, leads to almost irreversible destruction of communication and marital relationships. What is important here is, on the one hand, how different the evaluative criteria of the spouses are, and on the other, how individual criteria correspond to generally accepted ones. We can talk about double harmony when the value systems of the spouses coincide with each other and with the generally accepted system of values; about the coincidence of views with the generally accepted value system of only one of the spouses; about the compliance of the value criteria of both partners with generally accepted values while simultaneously differentiating their points of view; about double differentiation, when value systems diverge and the interests of both are not identified with generally accepted criteria.

In the absence of any of these groups of prerequisites for compatibility, optimal adaptation does not occur or it occurs slowly, and the harmony of the marital union is disrupted.

The most common factors that determine success or failure in a marriage are the personal qualities of the spouses and their ability to solve all kinds of problems and be in harmony with each other. In the absence of these skills, conflict situations often arise as a consequence of the incompatibility of any forces within one person or between spouses. It is important to take into account the individual psychological characteristics of each spouse. A rational and comprehensive indicator of their individuality can be their personality type: the most common cause of marital conflicts, as well as divorces, is “dissimilarity of characters”, incompatibility of spouses.

The source of difficulties in family life may be the personality traits of one or both spouses. We are talking about traits that initially corresponded to the norm, but were not quite adequate to the personal qualities of the partner, or the partner did not find the right approach to communication, was unable to cope with some features of his own psyche. In addition, these may also be pathological personality traits, which in themselves pose a problem in interpersonal relationships, and even more so in marital relationships, making them initially potentially conflicting and complex, requiring special skills and attitudes for more or less harmonious coexistence among family members (R. Vulis, 1999). When studying the personality of spouses, the following properties deserve special attention: extroversion - introversion, dominance - subordination, rigidity - flexibility, optimism - pessimism, carelessness - responsibility, rationalism - romanticism, irascibility - lability, ability to social adaptation.

There is no answer to the question about the influence of similarity - homogeny or opposition and complementarity - complementarity of personality traits on the harmony and success of a marriage. In some cases of polarity, homogeny has a positive effect, in others - complementarity, and in some cases (usually related, for example, to such a dimension as dominance - submission) only one of the polar properties is more beneficial for both partners. The character traits of the spouses are evidenced by their attitude towards work, people around them, property, themselves and relatives. Basic moral principles, interests, outlook, lifestyle, psychosocial maturity and value scale are important. These indicators reflect the fact that in addition to the personal qualities of the spouses, marital interaction is associated with the expectations and experiences of their previous lives. In order to help spouses having problems in their marriage, it is necessary to find out what some of their expectations are based on and what the real state of affairs in the family is. For this purpose, the marriage of their parents, brothers or sisters is usually considered; dynamics of development of marital relations.

The concept of duplication of properties of brothers and sisters suggests that a person strives to realize his relationship with brothers and sisters in new social connections. More stable and successful marriages are observed in cases where relationships between partners are built precisely on this principle, taking into account gender. In this sense, marital relations can be completely complementary (the husband finds an older sister in his wife, and the wife finds an older brother) or partially complementary (both have older brothers or sisters).

A complementary marriage is a union in which each partner occupies the same position as he had in relation to brothers or sisters in the parental family. Partially complementary relationships arise when one or both partners in the parental family have had several types of connections with their brothers and sisters, of which at least one is established with a partner. In a non-complementary marriage, disagreements and contradictions may arise on the basis of primacy or subordination in the family.

The concept of parental duplication suggests that a person learns to perform a masculine or feminine role largely from his parents and unconsciously uses the parental attitude model in his family. He learns the marital role on the basis of identifying himself with the parent of the same sex. Identification, identification is an elementary psychological reaction, which consists in the fact that an individual mentally equates himself with another person (parent).

Sometimes without noticing, he adopts a way of thinking, ideas and values, and most importantly, emotional reactions and internal states, unconsciously or consciously tries to become like his parent, therefore he approves of his standards of behavior and adapts to his assessments. The personality of the individual and the parent merge. This scheme also includes the role of a parent of the opposite sex: the forms of parental relationships become the standard.

In marriage, both partners try to adapt their relationship to internal expectations. Under the influence of falling in love, a person for some time may show “compliance” or, more accurately, “myopia”, partially refusing to implement his program for the sake of his partner, wanting to adapt to him. Usually this causes internal contradiction, so there is a desire to return to the programmed path.

The social inheritance of personal properties and behavioral patterns also determines the similarity of marital relationships, which are also inherited, so we often repeat not only the choice of a partner, but also many of the mistakes and problems of our parents. Two critical dimensions of the parental relationship largely determine the success of a child's marriage. The first important dimension is dominance in the family (which of the parents “commanded” and which obeyed), the second is the general well-being (balance and mutual acceptance) of the relationship. A comparison of relationships in prosperous and conflicting married couples shows that the balance of relationships is significantly influenced by a favorable marriage model of parents, a good relationship between father and mother, and a happy childhood. Balanced spouses were calm in childhood, they were rarely punished, and were often caressed.

There are also symmetrical, complementary and meta-complementary marriages. In a symmetrical marriage, both spouses have equal rights, none of them is subordinate to the other. Problems are resolved through agreement, exchange or compromise. In a complementary marriage, one gives orders, gives orders, the other awaits advice or instructions. In a meta-complementary marriage, the leading position is achieved by the one who realizes his own goals by emphasizing his weakness, inexperience, ineptitude and powerlessness, manipulating his partner.

Thus, with a dynamic approach to family problems, marital disharmony (violations) in relationships are analyzed from the point of view of the internal motivation for the behavior of both spouses. Current family conflicts are examined taking into account past conflicts, as well as examples of previous emotionally charged relationships. At the same time, the influence of the family in which each spouse grew up is assessed, its inherent atmosphere, balance, calmness, division of rights and responsibilities between father and mother, and reference to the experience of parents are taken into account.

The main prerequisite for change is the ability to understand this connection, to control one’s behavior, and to make comparisons. The comparison is presented as an evolutionary comparison: the early sources of each spouse's current behavior are taken into account. Everyone must understand why he is the way he is, what he expects from a marital union, and why he reacts to his partner’s behavior this way and not otherwise. Marriage is viewed as a consequence of the action of forces contained in the characteristics of the past experiences of the spouses, mainly in their previous personal connections.

When studying the problems of a married couple, special attention should be paid to the study of factors in the choice of the husband and wife of each other. The choice of a partner and interpersonal attractiveness in marriage are supported by factors that are of particular value to the individual or that arouse his hopes that social contact with a given partner will be favorable.

The impulse or the first phase of communication: “What is he like?” External attractiveness and demeanor play a significant role. The assessment of others is also important.
Advantages: “Who is he?” The center of gravity shifts to the area of similarity of interests, points of view, and scale of values. If significant discrepancies are revealed and the discovered shortcomings are not compensated by any advantages, the partners separate, believing that they are not suitable for each other.
Role, status: “Where is he?” Role compatibility is assessed. Partners determine whether they can take complementary roles in the marital union, which will allow them to satisfy their needs. Both the similarity of characters and inclinations, as well as the opposition of complementary traits, are assessed.

In all phases, the principle of commensurability of exchange operates: equilibrium is achieved only if such an exchange, from the point of view of the partners, is equivalent.

So, the problem of family well-being is primarily related to how psychologically compatible family members are with each other. Compatibility as a multi-level phenomenon is associated not only with the current state and personal characteristics of the spouses, but also with their past life experience, the experience of interpersonal relationships in the parental family. The most optimal situation is when the experience and learned type of relationship between spouses are generally positive, similar or complementary (complementary), and do not contradict the general social system of rules and norms of interaction and relationships.

In the process of studying family functioning and organizing psychosocial assistance to the family, it is necessary to take into account normative (correlated with a specific stage of family life) crises. The diversity of family systems significantly complicates the problem of analyzing the stages of marital and family relationships, however, some of the most typical options can be identified.

Researchers assume that marital relationships are constantly evolving and changing. From time to time, some “unforeseen” changes may occur in the relationship between spouses, but there are also a number of natural, “normative” changes that are typical for the development of a marriage over time. Romantic love during the period of courtship and newlyweds is replaced by a realistic understanding of marriage. Often it comes to a confrontation between idealistic ideas about marriage and a partner with the real “little things” of everyday life. After the birth of children, new joys and worries appear. Certain stages in the development of marital relationships correspond to the periods of raising children, their separation from their parents and possible leaving home. The best known is the system of “stages”, where the presence or absence of children in the family and their age are used as the main sign of their delimitation. E. Duval (E.M. Viuan, 1957), for example, identified the following phases in the family life cycle.

Meeting of future spouses, their emotional attraction to each other.

Acceptance and development of new parental roles.

Adoption of a new person (child) into the family. The transition from dyadic relationships between spouses to relationships in a triangle.

Introduction of children into non-family institutions.

Acceptance of children's adolescence.

Experimenting with independence.

Preparing for children to leave the family.

The departure of children from the family, the acceptance of their departure, the life of spouses “eye to eye.”

Acceptance of the fact of retirement and old age.

When analyzing the stages of development of marital relations, the following are distinguished: young marriage, middle-aged marriage and mature marriage.

A young marriage lasts less than five years. The age of the spouses is from 18 to 30 years. During this period, they get used to each other, buy furniture and household items, often do not have their own apartment and live with the parents of one of them. Over time, an apartment appears, which is gradually furnished, and their own household is built. The spouses are expecting children, with the birth of which arise responsibilities associated with their care and concern. In the professional field, young spouses are just acquiring some qualifications; gradually they reach a certain position and adapt to the new family environment. My wife has been on maternity leave for some time. Living together requires considerable costs, including psychological ones, so their parents support them financially and “morally”.

A middle-aged marriage lasts 6-14 years. During this period, people are economically active, occupy a stable social position and are freed from the need to purchase an apartment, furniture, etc. There are no small children in the house anymore; children – schoolchildren or students – are becoming more and more independent. In addition to household responsibilities, a wife can devote much more time to professional activities.

Marriage of mature age begins after 15 and lasts up to 25 years. The family already has adult children, the spouses are left alone or are getting used to living with their families and raising their grandchildren.

Older marriages are characterized by decreased productivity and increased health problems. Marriage is usually stable. The spouses need help and are afraid of losing each other. The relationship between them is the same as it developed during their long life together. At this time it is already difficult to change anything. Narrowing social contacts sometimes increases pressure on adult children, especially when they live together, which can cause conflicts. Conflicts between old people may reflect their conflict with the “young people” due to different attitudes towards them.

A crisis situation in the family can arise without the influence of any external factors that determine the everyday and economic situation of a married couple, without the intervention of parents, betrayal or any pathological personality traits of one of the spouses. The presence of these factors accelerates the creation of a crisis situation and aggravates it. The feeling of dissatisfaction grows, differences in views are revealed, silent protest, quarrels, a feeling of being deceived and reproaches arise.

There are two main critical periods in the development of a marital relationship.

The first occurs between the third and seventh years of married life and lasts, in favorable cases, about a year. The following factors contribute to its occurrence:

disappearance of romantic moods, active rejection of contrast in the partner’s behavior during the period of falling in love and in everyday family life;
an increase in the number of situations in which spouses find different views on things and cannot come to an agreement;
more frequent manifestations of negative emotions, increased tension in relations between partners.

The second crisis period occurs approximately between the seventeenth and twenty-fifth years of marriage. It is less deep than the first one and can last for several years. Its occurrence often coincides:

with the approaching period of involution, with increased emotional instability, fears, and the appearance of various somatic complaints;
with the emergence of a feeling of loneliness associated with the departure of children;
with the wife’s increasing emotional dependence, her worries about rapid aging, as well as the husband’s possible desire to express himself sexually on the side “before it’s too late.”

Thus, crisis situations have certain patterns that underlie the foundations of marital relationships. To effectively solve problems that arise, you should not look for blame only in the behavior of one of the partners. These patterns must be known and taken into account, adjusting your behavior in accordance with them.

A special issue is the stage of remarriage. During a divorce, a feeling of loss almost inevitably arises, a feeling of rejection, abandonment, and uselessness arises. At first glance, it may seem that only those for whom the divorce was a “surprise” feel abandonment, but the initiator himself experiences the same negative feelings long before making the final decision on divorce. Like any grief, divorce is experienced in several stages: the first shock, depression and rebirth. Each stage requires time and active reaction. Having missed one of them, for example, “closing your eyes” with the help of alcohol or superficial love, a person dooms himself to an unexpected return to an unexperienced stage.

Divorce as a phenomenon is often associated with the experience of interpersonal relationships that spouses learned in their parental families. It has been noticed that the mistakes of relatives “one would like to repeat,” and children of divorced parents often subconsciously provoke divorces in their families. You can try to break this “vicious circle” by analyzing your and your parents’ styles of family relationships. This analysis is easier to do with the help of a family psychotherapist. But first, it’s a good idea to find and explain your mistakes yourself. This will help not only to see them, but also to understand them in order to avoid repetition in the future. The experience of those who have found family happiness on the second or third try encourages those getting divorced. In addition, there is even an opinion that every new marriage is like a new life, and therefore a person who has had several spouses has lived several lives.

The advantages of remarriage compared to the first one are that partners no longer count on “eternal” romantic love and approach marriage more rationally. They are more likely to feel grateful for all the good things that their second marriage provides them, try to preserve it, and protect it more actively. If disharmony in family relationships arises again, the spouses are more prepared, motivated to correct their relationship and, if necessary, are more likely to break off the relationship.

However, neurotics and people with pathological character traits in their second marriage experience the same unsuccessful choice of a partner and make the same mistakes that led to the breakdown of their first marriage. Normal, adaptive individuals are more likely to draw correct conclusions from a previous failure, choose a more adequate partner for a second marriage, or behave more meaningfully.

So, the marriage union in its development goes through a number of stages, accompanied by so-called normative crises. The general nature of these crises, however, does not determine their severity and severity. Much depends on the desire and culture of interpersonal relations of spouses, their ability to reconsider their erroneous views, and the desire to maintain psychologically prosperous, healthy relationships with other family members. Having a conscious attitude toward drinking together with a partner and timely detection of changes in relationships allows spouses to adjust their behavior. Inattention to each other's development processes, changes in the partner's needs and interests puts the family on the brink of collapse. Divorce as an extreme option for resolving emerging family contradictions can become a constructive experience if a person realizes the need to change his own ideas about himself, other people, and family life.

To make your family happy, you need to study factors of family well-being and follow them. Those people who are looking for happiness in life will never find it until they understand the factors influencing it. Family is the most beautiful miracle and event in a person’s life, but not everyone understands this without trying to make their family more prosperous. Psychologists decided to help you find these factors of family well-being, and how to start using them in life.

It is enough just to read the article to understand this question and find the answer to it, since psychologists have spent considerable time studying those families who independently found the factors of well-being and used them in their family. These families are happy today. Accordingly, you can also put all the tips given here into practice and make your family happy.

What does happiness mean to you?

Before you start studying factors family well-being, it is advisable to realize what happiness actually means to you. According to research by psychologists, each person has his own opinion about happiness, so you also need to have your own opinion about happiness. This will help you in the future to find this happiness in the family and thereby improve the well-being of the family.

Mutual understanding in the family

The most important factor in family well-being is mutual understanding in the family, which needs to be developed. Without mutual understanding in a family, it is impossible to build happiness and love. If a family does not understand each other, then this is a problem and needs to be solved as soon as possible. To do this, become an initiator and start looking for ways to begin to understand your family. Try to listen to everyone’s opinions, and with common efforts come to a common opinion. There is no need to argue, since the dispute is not causal family well-being and the problem of conflicts. You need to calmly listen to or even write down everyone’s opinions, and then come to a common, thoughtful decision. If there is no understanding in your family, find the source, it is different in each family.

Support in difficult times

Factor family well-being, without which a family cannot be called happy, it is support in difficult times. Your family should be as a single whole, and if someone is feeling bad or having a hard time, support them in this difficult moment. This should be done as a matter of course. If a family does not have such a habit and principle, it is dysfunctional. Start not just saying empty words, but understand the one who is feeling bad, in order to feel how painful it is, then you will begin to understand the problem more and solve it together.

Problems and solutions

Every individual has and will have problems, just as every family has problems, factors of family well-being are always associated precisely with problems and the reaction to them. Each person or family perceives problems differently, some run away and are afraid of them, believing that having a problem is bad. Others believe that problems only bring knowledge and experience if they are solved immediately as they appear, without running away from them. In fact, the success and well-being of every family does not lie in the absence of problems, but in the fact that such a family solves problems as soon as they arise, realizing that every problem has its own benefits.

Any successful person will answer you that his success is associated not with victories, but with defeats, since problems carry more benefits, experience and knowledge than victories. Therefore, be glad that there are many problems in your family, and finally begin to solve them. If you are interested in the power of problems and want to learn more about them, read the article:, which describes in more detail a list of popular problems and how to solve them, gaining positive experience.

Love and attention in the family

We must not forget that all factors of family well-being are integrally connected with love and attention, without this it is impossible to build a successful and happy family. A family in which there is no love and attention is considered dysfunctional. But there is no need to be upset, because according to statistics, there are 80% of such families worldwide, and this is a big problem. All this depends only on those who created this family. Today, views on life, opinions, values and priorities have changed, so families are most often created not for love, but for profit, or for other reasons.

If you want to create a prosperous family, create it with the person you really love. If you cannot yet accurately understand whether you are loved or loved, then do not rush into starting a family. Psychologists recommend that in such moments, take your time and live together for at least 2-3 years without being married. Thus, if you did not love, then after 2-3 years, your couple will separate, which is safer if you had a family and children.

Money in the family is a tool for well-being

If we look at statistics, 90% of people and families have problems with money. This is not due to the fact that people receive small salaries and their incomes are small. It all depends on the principles and habits of a person. All people and families who have a money problem have developed the habit of spending 100% of their income, and borrowing another 20% from friends and acquaintances before payday. This habit is dangerous and it is what causes problems associated with lack of money, which leads to poor family well-being. In order to solve this problem, just read the article: